fandomhigh | Coping With Loss, Tuesday, Third Period

"Last week, we did a little introduction round to each other," Kaidan said. Well... sort of, anyway. He was in short order learning that for a teacher, he made a really great marine. Which was why today he'd be sticking to the book. "This week, it's time to introduce ourselves to ourselves. So to speak."

He walked past all the students, leaving a sheet of paper and a sheet full of questions on each desk.

"You'll find a couple of questions on here," he said. "They have to do with self-awareness. You can't learn to cope with your own grief - or that of someone else - without understanding who you are and how you tick. Now, I know this is a private thing, and some of you might not want to share, so. If you want, you can turn it in, and I'll be able to better adapt the class to what you need. If you don't want... well, I want you to write this out anyway. Then you can toss it in the trash, turn in only half of it, or take it with you and burn it - I don't care."

He paused.

Looked at the class.

"But I do want to see you writing," he said. "Take your time. This is for your benefit, not mine."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Like you're about to make a test.

Mercy Thompson

Evan Sabahnur

Flick

Cade

Well, instructions, really.

Cade would totally be taking the test with him to burn. Ugh, sharing.

If you want to call it that...

How comfortable and confident are you in your own ability to deal with grief and loss?

I've been dealing with it for years now. I'm not sure how well I'm coping, but I think it's a little better these days. How confident and comfortable am I with it? Not really at all. Is anyone?

Not very. I haven't really had to deal with it for most of my life. I default to anger at first... people get hurt.

Confident enough.

Nice and succinct.

Heh.

Very illuminating, Cade.

Haven't died yet?

Do you understand the impact of death on people of different ages, genders, cultures, and spiritual orientations?

I've seen an awful lot of death because of where and how I grew up. I've seen how it affects whole families. I don't know as much about different cultures or spiritual orientations, but I've read some about it.

I've read a lot about what death means to different cultures and spiritualities, but I would like to understand more. I don't know much about either of the other ones, though. I've seen a bit of grief from people of different genders and many different ages, but... it all just looks like pain, to me.

Yes. I understand it. It's different for everyone.

Still short but it could have been shorter.

No. I only understand it for me. Who would ask other people about it?

How familiar are you with other life events and losses that cause grief reactions? Have you lived through one or more yourself? Have you witnessed others living through them?

Like maybe finding out the guy you're in love with and who wants you to run away and marry him only wants you 'cause you can have kids? And because of him you lose your only home and get sent to your mom's where you find out she's got a whole other family she didn't bother to tell you about? Stuff like that? No, never.

I

Evan left his pen sitting on the page for so long that there was a large ink spot left behind when he started writing again.

I'm familiar with things besides death that cause grief, yes. Betrayal. Learning the truth after years of lies from people I should have been able to trust. Yes.

Familiar enough. Who hasn't lived through something like that? That's life.

Some, Cade admitted grudgingly. But that's what death sticks are for.

How prepared are you to respond effectively to those who are grieving around you?

I think I'm a pretty good listener and shoulder.

I can offer a sympathetic ear and a shoulder of support to lean on, but I'm still not sure, in every situation, if those are what people need from me.

They can take care of themselves.

He could barely take care of himself.

Crying and stuff? I'm not really great with it.

What types of grief reactions might trigger your own grief reactions and do you know how to handle them?

I have no idea. I mean, when people talk about losing their families it makes me sad, but... I guess you just deal with it when it comes up.

I don't know. I'm still pretty new at this. Other people's sadness hasn't triggered mine yet, I don't think. Feeling helpless does, though. A little.

I can handle my own emotions. I don't get triggered.

He was a professional at repression.

What the kark kind of question is this? I don't want other people having 'grief reactions' around me. Yuck.

Cade was the most sympathetic person ever.

How good are you at acknowledging your own grief?

I know it's there, but I don't necessarily like talking about it.

I try really hard to be self-aware about things like that. But... I don't let myself feel it sometimes when I maybe should. It bottles up. But usually I think it's safer that way.

It's there. That's acknowledgement enough.

There's a difference between acknowledging it and telling other people all about it, okay.

Who's... really hoping this is going to go better than last week.

I need this coming to come out already.

Hi, inexplicably half-naked Kaidan...

Edited 2013-07-16 08:31 (UTC)

Coping With Loss, Tuesday, Third Period

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