fandomhigh | Public Speaking [Tuesday, January 22, 2013]

"Every January 20th since the 20th Amendment was passed in 1933--" Josh raised his eyebrow, "--because nothing says 'fantastic idea' like swearing a guy in on the steps of the Capitol in January because it's never cold then, we have inaugurated the President of the United States. It's an unbroken ceremony that stretches back to the dawn of our Republic and the significance cannot be overstated. On a planet where elections are rigged, routinely undermined or not held at all, we do this thing where every four years we run two extremely powerful people against each other and the loser goes home. He--because so far it's always been a he--doesn't grab guns and start a coup. He might throw an extremely epic tantrum behind closed doors, but he doesn't leave the country. He doesn't disappear off the face of the Earth in the middle of the night along with his family and is never talked about again. And that, my friends, is worth celebrating. So there's a parade and balls and pomp and circumstance."

He walked between the desks, handing out sheets of paper. "And an inaugural speech. Some--all right, most--are completely forgettable, but it's the first chance a president gets to set the tone of his administration, to address the challenges facing the nation. This one is Abraham Lincoln's second inaugural address, widely regarded as the best address ever given. It's short--Lincoln's speeches generally were--and the context is fairly obvious from the speech. We were finishing up our Civil War and trying to figure out how to put together the pieces of our broken country which for four years had torn itself apart and laid waste to an entire generation of young, and then not so young, men. Many in the North were calling for the South to pay even more heavily than it had, to impose huge restrictions and burdens upon them before they could rejoin the Union.

"Lincoln didn't want to do that. That final paragraph, 'With malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in, to bind up the nation's wounds, to care for him who shall have borne the battle and for his widow and his orphan, to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace among ourselves and with all nations,' is a line that has resonated from more than a hundred years. He was calling us to be better than our need for revenge, our pettiness." Josh shrugged. "And a month later, he became our first president to be assassinated. Because sometimes, and this is important, people are assholes."

He moved back to his desk. "Right then. Next week your assignment is to find a political speech--either from this country or your own--and put together a five minute speech about what parts in it you felt resonated. Examine the language and try to figure out why some speeches soar and some make you fall asleep standing up. Today's assignment, though, was to prepare an informational speech about the last twenty years in your dimension with a visual aid. Wow me."

He glanced up. "Oh, and our press secretary today is Lucrezia Borgia. So yeah, good luck with that."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Come on down! You're the next contestant on "What kind of insane things will my classmates ask me?"

To prepare for the onslaught!

Lucrezia squared her shoulders. She had once blackmailed an entire College of Cardinals; whatever her classmates held in store could hardly be as bad. She approached the podium, drew a deep breath, and waited for the onslaught.

Ask away!

"Why would you move an outdoor swearing-in ceremony away from early Spring to the middle of winter?" Josh demanded.

"We've just passed the new year," Lucrezia said. "It's far cleaner to have shifts in power align to calendar years. Early spring is still capable of snow and chill, after all."

"Continuing from the last question, if someone got hypothermia or frostbite from attending a ceremony in January, what would your official response be?"

Maddie didn't know if that was even possible, but you were supposed to try and trip them up, right?

"I would feel very sorry for the individual who chose to attend the ceremony without the appropriate winter garments," Lucrezia said. "I would advise said person to seek a physician's care for their malady."

Kate didn't really know Lucrezia, but she figured she'd throw her a softy.

"How do you feel about those cute little angel pins people wear?"

Lucrezia smiled at Kate, remembering their earlier conversation.

"I feel as though the person has an inadequate understanding of the nature of angels," she said, "but that people should by all means where whatever pins they may choose."

Gert just wanted to know, "What's the time difference between here and Barcelona?"

What, it was a hard question that she personally wanted to know the answer to.

"The time difference between this island and the Holy See is just over five hundred years," Lucrezia answered smoothly. "What time it may be in Barcelona, only God in His wisdom may say."

"Ms Borgia," Lex asked, all seriousness. "Did you write the book of love, and do you have faith in God above?"

Because it wasn't like Lucrezia knew where he slept or anything, oh wait.

Lucrezia bit her lip, to avoid bursting out into laughter at the absurdity. She would certainly plot some revenge later. For now ...

"I regret to say that I have never authored any titles," she allowed, "though I am able to read and write. As daughter of the Holy Pope of Rome, my faith is beyond question."

She would ask him what that was supposed to mean later.

"Ms. Borgia," Petra said, "do you endorse the controversial use of space heaters at an outdoor swearing in ceremony in the middle of winter, despite their potential negative impact on the environment?"

It didn't help that Lucrezia was not entirely sure of what space heaters might be. But admitting that felt like admitting defeat. Better to play vague.

"This office has already completed its preparations for the ceremony," she said, "keeping in mind the needs of the citizens as well as concern for the environment. What individual citizens wish to use to aid them is for those people to decide."

Public Speaking [Tuesday, January 22, 2013]

Press Secretary of the Day: Lucrezia Borgia [1/22]

For the Press Secretary! [1/22]

Re: For the Press Secretary! [1/22]

For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]

Re: For the Reporters! [1/22]