fandomhigh | How To Not Do Things, Thursday, Period One

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how to not do things

How To Not Do Things, Thursday, Period One

For the record, April still hated that this thing took place during first period. She could be asleep right now, guys. Granted, she intended to go back to sleep immediately after class ended, so an hour-long break probably wasn't going to ruin too much.

However. Today's class was meeting in the Danger Shop, which was... loud. Very loud, in fact, because it was set up to look like a Six Flags, complete with long lines, large families, junk food, and... ninety-five degree weather without a water ride to be found.

Sorry, guys.

"This place is supposed to be fun," April announced when the whole class had arrived. "There's rides and stuff. People love it." In the background, a Danger Shop simulated NPC who looked about nine or ten threw up on his mother's shoes. "That kid loved it." Yes, thank you, April. "You guys can go do whatever you want. Go on rides or whatever. Everyone's gonna meet up here in an hour and figure out who had the best time, but if you're sunburned and exhausted we're all gonna laugh at you."

And... apparently that was it, because she was immediately stalking off toward a place that served food. With tables. And air-conditioning.

It was possible that spending the entire hour in a place with tables and air-conditioning was the only way you wouldn't wind up sunburned and exhausted in this here simulation, so that was April's advice to you all.

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Like it's your assignment to play in an amusement park!

Juliet Darling

Miriam Black

Jeremy Darling

Maeby Fünke

Bucky Katt

Richie Ryan

That doesn't sound too bad, right?

So, April has calibrated the Danger Shop simulation to give one hell of a Danger-Shop-exclusive sunburn to anyone who spends a significant amount of time, say, waiting in line for a ride, or playing those games outside. Doing anything inside is acceptable. Somehow managing to to cut to the front of a line so you can ride it quickly is acceptable. Getting food and doing nothing else is definitely acceptable. But anything prolonged outside is... probably not the best idea. Sorry, students?

Juliet found a ticket booth, harangued the agent until she agreed to sell Juliet a special membership pass that let her cut to the front of the lines, and then blissfully rode a couple rides before settling in to take in part of a performance.

She was looking pretty smug by the end of class.

Simulated or not, Miriam avoided crowds, especially in hot weather because there was way too much exposed skin. Also, free food. So there was little debate before she headed to the air-conditioned food area so she could sit down, kick back, and inhale a large amount of junk food.

"Is this shit even real?" she asked her plate of fries. "Am I going to be hungry an hour later?" Whatever. She was happy as a pig in shit for now.

It was super early. Maeby liked amusement parks, but it was super-early.

She was going to find somewhere to take a nap. Or at least, lie on the ground in the shade somewhere with her Game Boy.

Yeah, it was way too hot. Screw this.

Bucky found his way past a few "Do Not Enter" and "Employees Only" signs into some sort of dressing room, and spent his hour shredding Looney Tunes costumes into artistic masterpieces of velvet tatters.

Now, Richie hadn't spent much time in amusement parks in his life so he didn't really have any experience working the system. But he knew that people on crutches or in wheelchairs got to jump the line. He didn't have any crutches handy but he could fake a limp well enough and managed to rent himself a wheelchair with a story about recent knee surgery. If only he had someone to push it he'd be golden.

Talk. Are you sunburned and miserable, or was that awesome? And what have we learned?

"I beat level six," Maeby said, pocketing her Game Boy.

Helpful as ever.

She's a ball of sunshine.

Okay, Maeby decided she was actually going to pretend she cared about classes today. Why not?

"So, um, I wasn't here last week?" she said, without much (any) preamble. "It was early and I ... didn't feel like getting up."

... yup. Sometimes she bothered with elaborate excuses, but it was pretty early today, too, so ... yeah, she wasn't feeling it.

April... yeah, she just didn't have it in her to object to that kind of sound reasoning.

So she she shrugged. "Makes sense." Personally, she was surprised that anyone who had signed up for this class was voluntarily attending it at the time it was scheduled. "Scheduling's ridiculous."

"Can you just move it later?" Maeby asked. "Like, noon. I could be up by noon."

She wasn't saying she'd show up every week if it was at noon. Just that it'd be marginally easier to get here.

"You and me both." Sigh. "But the office is full of caribou or something and they don't care."

That required a bit of a stare. Sorry, April.

"Okay, I have to ask, because this island is completely insane," Maeby said. "Are there ... is there any chance that's slang I don't know about, or are there actual fucking caribou in the office?"

How hard was it to CGI caribou? Ugh, it was too early to think about work.

"Actual," April repeated, "caribou."

Or something. Look, she wasn't really up on the difference between different kinds of deer, okay?

"They're fucking rude."

Maeby was going to take this opportunity to rub her eyes.

"Would it kill this school to have people working in its office?" she asked. "People without wings or scales or ten extra faces or something?"

"Probably," April said. "Wouldn't be hipster enough."

April. Fandom High was not hipster. Good god.

"I don't get this whole hipster trend," Maeby admitted. "It seems like a lot of pretending you don't like things."

Said the girl who did her best to act like she didn't care about much of anything.

April rolled her eyes. "People."

That summed it up. You know. If you weren't particular on having either details or sense in your explanations.

"So hey," she segued. "You're like an expert slacker?" Blowing off a blow-off class sent a certain message, see.

"I really am," Maeby said. Modesty was not really her thing. "I once convinced my dad that it was Help Your Dad Follow His Dreams day so I didn't have to go to school."

Which spoke more to how dumb her dad was than anything. Still.

April snorted. "Good," she decided, thinking back to her and Atton's conversation from earlier. "You're the new minion." She shrugged. "TA. Whatever. Congrats."

"... okay," Maeby said, giving April an uncertain look. "Am I gonna have to do work?"

Priorities.

"Only when I don't feel like doing it." Which was almost always. So... "Sorry."

Edited 2012-09-06 12:22 (UTC)

... So I just discovered that the Great American Scream Machine was torn down, and that makes me all kinds of sad. I nearly blacked out on that coaster -- it was awesome!

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How To Not Do Things, Thursday, Period One

Sign In

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Listen to the Assignment

Go Play in Six Flags

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Meet Up

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Talk to April

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OOC

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