fandomhigh | Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day: Part I

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!event: welcome picnic

Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day: Part I

Well.

It was raining popsicles and suntan lotion today. Because Fandom liked to make the newbies cry sometimes. Yes, the island had a sense of humor about these things.

We've all learned to accept that and move on with our lives. Well, all of us except for Britta. But she's the worst.

[~~Please wait for~~ OCD is up! This is part one of the picnic, specifically for meeting siblings, roommates, and teachers. The rest of the picnic is happening here and here, in an effort to keep browsers from breaking for as long as possible.]

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Miriam took one look at the list and burst out laughing. "Holy fuck!" she howled. She wasn't sure if this meant God loved her or hated her.

"You'd better not snore," she said, a shit-eating grin on her face once she'd tracked down Stannis.

No, but Stannis did grind his teeth, and he was doing quite a bit of that right now as he affixed the person he had hoped to see very little of with the same hard glare he had given her before they boarded the bus.

"And you," he finally said, "hopefully can find at least a shred of decency, else you'd better learn to sleep with one eye open. Surely, this is a mistake."

A terrible, terrible mistake.

"Is that supposed to be some kind of threat?" Miriam snorted. "Do I have to worry about you crawling into bed with me at night? If you want to sleep with me, all you have to do is ask."

Forget worrying about Stannis grinding his teeth in his sleep. At this rate, he wasn't going to have much teeth left to grind.

"Trust me," he grimaced, "that will be the last thing you will have to worry about."

He hoped that it was a mistake and that he hadn't been paired up to room with Miriam as some sort of attempt to have someone make sure she didn't make any stupid mistakes or stay out of trouble. If he wanted to babysit, he would have stayed in Storm's End.

"Lighten up, Stannis," Miriam said, using his name this time instead of the movie quote because that had gone over his head earlier. "C'mon, this is going to be fun. Think of it as some sort of buddy cop movie. I'll be Murtough, you be Riggs."

Stannis tried to understand that. He did. For about five seconds.

"Next time you speak," he said, "I advise that it be actual words instead of nonsense, Miriam."

Edited 2012-06-30 13:48 (UTC)

"I think the first thing we need to do is bring your pop culture quotient up," Miriam said, rolling her eyes. "Your childhood must've been even more repressed than mine."

"I think," stated Stannis, "the first thing we need to do is recognize the fact that there is nothing we need to do. I have no desire to learn anything deemed important by a foul-mouthed harlot."

"Harlot?" Miriam slapped a hand to her chest in mock dismay. "Why, sir, how dare you disparage my character like that!" she said in a bad southern accent. "I'll have you know I've never charged."

"Slut, then, if you prefer," said Stannis, because he had the social graces of a lobster. Which was not fair to lobsters, really. "I disparage your character no further than you disparage it yourself."

He drew in a breath, lifting his chin, as though he had no intention of contributing anything more to the conversation.

Miriam shrugged. "Fair enough," she said, then grinned wickedly. "I'll be sure to put a sock on the door when I'm entertaining gentlemen callers."

She gave Stannis a salute. "See you around, Stanny. We're going to be wonderful friends."

A mistake. Surely a mistake. Stannis vowed to himself right then and there to have it rectified as soon as possible.

In the meantime, if looks could kill...well, then, the list of roommate assignments on the table was likely to burst into flame at any moment.

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Fandom High Welcome Picnic, Front Lawn of the School, All Day: Part I

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