http://yakkoyaks.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] yakkoyaks.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] fandomhigh2012-06-11 12:58 am
Entry tags:

Steven Spielberg Presents: History!, Monday, Period 4

"Hello, class," Yakko said, with an almost alarming sense of calm and control. "Today, I'll be talking about a figure who goes down as one of the greatest human monsters history has ever known. A person whose name is synonymous with evil and - more importantly for this class period - a specific kind of facial hair."

"It used to be called the Toothbrush Mustache," Yakko said, holding a toothbrush above his lip as a demonstration. "It first became popular in late 19th Century America. But it first became iconic when silent film megastar Charlie Chaplin tramped it up throughout cinemas while wearing one."

"Then Hitler came along and ruined the toothbrush for everyone by being really really evil. If you don't know how, please refer to any Steven Spielberg movie from the late 90's, because I'm not touching that with a ten foot stick. I know what happened to those Bugs Bunny cartoons. I may be zany, but I'm not risking getting locked up in that cartoon vault."

"But the only person who could get away with that look once Hitler ruined it? Chaplan, who spoofed Hitler in movies, and used the mustache to help do it! Now that's comedy." Yakko suddenly wrote a check for $20 to Slappy the Squirrel, which he would mail later.

"But then nobody wore it again, not even one-time Fandom High Journalism teacher, J. Jonah Jameson, probably because the Hitler 'stache was too 'edgy.' But that all changed when former greatest basketball player in the world and current worst basketball owner in the world Michael Jordan decided to wear one in commercials. On the other hand, he has more money, fame, and success than any of us could imagine combined, and I don't know about you, but I've got a pretty active imagination. So if he wants to wear a Hitler 'stache, dress like a cartoon character, and run a basketball team into the ground, he can probably survive it."

"So, what have we learned from this?" Yakko asked as a string lowered from the ceiing next to him. "That's right. THAT I HAVE FAKE FACIAL HAIR FOR EVERYONE!" Yakko yanked down on the string and fake mustaches, beards, and sideburns fell onto the class. By the time the class would have recovered from surprise, Yakko was already wearing a fake beard that could only be called 'The Volstagg.'

[OOC: I forgot about class until I was almost asleep and won't have time to post in the morning. So... apparently this is what happens.]
ext_1340895: (weapons || rocketlauncher)

Re: Sign In

[identity profile] upmysleeve.livejournal.com 2012-06-11 04:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Ace McShamelesslyusingthispostasachancetouseallmyanimatediconsever
whenshewasnice: (Medusa gaze.)

Re: Sign In

[personal profile] whenshewasnice 2012-06-11 04:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Natalie Adams

Re: Sign In

[identity profile] showmetheproof.livejournal.com 2012-06-14 05:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Dana Scully
ext_1340895: (class || reading)

Re: Listen to the Lecture

[identity profile] upmysleeve.livejournal.com 2012-06-11 04:32 pm (UTC)(link)
The lecture was not at all what Ace had expected.

That said, honestly, she'd already heard enough about the topic she was expecting when the words synonymous with evil came up to last several lifetimes. An incredibly silly report on facial hair? So much less likely to make her want to go find a building to blow up after class.

Re: Facial Hair

[identity profile] ihavediabetes.livejournal.com 2012-06-11 01:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, Stacey figured she could look at the facial hair. Which meant she could pick something at random and fuss with it so much that she'd "forget" to actually put it on.
ultron_junior: ([pb] brown t-shirt)

Re: Facial Hair

[personal profile] ultron_junior 2012-06-11 01:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Victor kept prodding his fake beard with a fingertip. He didn't trust it not to start moving.
ext_1340895: (animated || dalekbat)

Re: OOC

[identity profile] upmysleeve.livejournal.com 2012-06-11 01:34 pm (UTC)(link)
I applaud you for managing to introduce bears into an FH scene in an entirely new way: via typo.

Ace: *steals one before you correct it and raises it as a pet*

Re: OOC

[identity profile] alreadyisbeyond.livejournal.com 2012-06-11 02:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I came so close to leaving it....
ext_1340895: (animated || jumpforjoy)

Re: OOC

[identity profile] upmysleeve.livejournal.com 2012-06-11 04:24 pm (UTC)(link)
"Squished by fake bears" is such a fun way to die!