"You have to go all the way to Chicago to shop? Isn't DC close enough? Right, I can see that that is not a persuasive arguement. All right. Why should I get off my lazy ass and go to one of the coldest cities in the country, riding herd on a bunch of teenagers -- present company excepted, of course, although the hormones still apply -- who are going to ignore what I say, generally get in trouble, and make me beg for someone to chop off my head?"