fandomhigh | Wednesday: What was the school board thinking giving Jamie Madrox a teaching position?

Sometime earlier in the week, the students would have gotten a notice that swimsuits were optional for class today. And anyone fearing the reason why might feel relieved when they saw that the danger shop had been transformed into a cruise ship

But not just any cruise ship. It was a cruise ship staffed by Jamie Madrox duplicates in white uniforms.

"Welcome aboard students!" Jamie said as he doffed a captain's hat. "Today we're going to set a course... for LOVE!"

Suddenly the cruise ship was filled with music and song. The Jamies were singing and dancing around in a well coordinated choreography that included ballet, jazz, tap and lots of spirit fingers.

If the students weren't afraid now? They should be.

"Homecoming is coming up kids," Jamie said when the musical number was complete. "Which means... dating. And falling in love. Which for many of you might be a completely new thing. So to help you along I've used a scientific process to bring the most compatible people together in class and give you an optimal situation where you can interact."

Point of fact: Jamie's scientific process involved throwing darts at a dartboard. Possibly in the teacher's lounge and at his own face.

"Enjoy your cruise ladies and gentlemen... on the Love Boat."

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If she hasn't doubted the sanity of Jamie yet, today would be the day to do so.

Please, she doubted his sanity the moment she met him.

That didn't mean she didn't have the supplies he'd asked for. They were all labeled "RMS Lucitania". Which was a pretty neat trick, since effective sunscreen hadn't been invented until the 1930s.

"I should have stayed in Switzerland."

"Nah. Besides chocolate, neutrality and Ricola they got nothing going for them," Jamie said as he straightened his captain's hat. "If you want you can have a clipboard and be the cruise director."

"You're forgetting the distinct lack of crazy mutant high school teachers with a yen for butter cows," Claudia pointed out. ". . . Would I get to order people around?"

"Yes," Jamie said after pausing for a moment to think about it. "Go mad with power."

Behold. The all powerful clipboard. It is handed to her.

Claudia took the all mighty clipboard with all the reverence it was due.

"Sweet!"

Wednesday: What was the school board thinking giving Jamie Madrox a teaching position?

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