fandomhigh | Don't Be Evil [Friday, Second Period]

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don't be evil

Don't Be Evil [Friday, Second Period]

Once again class was in an ordinary classroom. Unlike last week, Oz held out a lucky dip as the students entered. Those with sharp eyes may have noticed he had large squares of hair missing from his lower arms.

"Good morning, kids, good to see you all back here again," he greeted once the class had finished arriving. "Now last week you all gave an example of choosing not being evil, but what happens when you stop that? When you start that slow descent into villainy? What are the tiny little warning signs that you or someone close to you may be sliding towards evil? Well, here are some of them."

And wouldn't you know it, he had a power-point display ready.

After the slide-show finished, Oz turned back the class. "Now, not all of those in and of themselves can be taken as out and out proof of evil, after all, some of these apply to emos and goths, who are at worst merely annoying. They're also not the only ones, so I want you to find a partner or two and discuss both these potential warning signs of evil, and any others you can come up with."

"Also the position of TA is still open, anyone who applies gets something else from the pick-me-up box."

[OCD up]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Find a partner or two and discuss how to tell if someone is evil.

[Feel free to make the threads messy.]

Kate mostly took anything attacking her or anyone else for no good reason as evil, and left it at that, but she'd probably be open to discussion.

She was so far not eating her Java Pop, instead tapping it repeatedly against her desk while she waited for a partner.

If you asked anyone from home, they'd tell you that the source of Sam's possible evil was inside him and inherited by his absentee father. Sam guessed that made him lucky since he could keep that hidden.

He hadn't tried the Crackheads in his hand but he was thinking about it while he waited for a partner.

Since talking to girls made Butters pretty nervous (they were all mostly evil anyway, right?), he found it much easier to give his roommate a grin and offered, "I bet, if they have a mustache, and they go like this," he lifted a hand to his mouth and twirled an imaginary thread of a mustache between his forefinger and thumb, "that's a pretty good sign of evil."

"What if they're just bad at mustache grooming?" Sam wondered, snickering at that impression Butters had just demonstrated. "Maybe their lip's itchy?"

The snickering helped Butters to grin, chuckling a little himself as he got excited and encouraged by Sam's playing along. "Well, if they're pretty bad at groomin' a mustache," Butters reasoned, "it's pretty evil of 'em to keep one, y'know? And then you gotta ask why their lip is itchy in the first place. It's probably 'cause they were up to something, you guess it, evil."

"So, is it just the mustache that's evil?" Sam wondered, tapping his chin. "What about a full beard? Wouldn't that be extra evil or something? Epitome of pure evil?"

But Butters had to shake his head at this suggestion. "Naw, Sam, that can't be it," he reasoned. "I think it's just mustaches. I mean, Santa's got a beard, and he's not evil. Jesus kind of has a beard, too, and God definitely does, and they're not evil. So maybe that's how you can tell a person's evil. They can grow a mustache, but they can't move on to growin' out a nice, big bushy beard."

"Yeah, but evil goatees!" Sam pointed out, laughing. "If someone gets a long, pointy goatee going on, they can stroke it evilly just like a mustache that's able to be twirled."

Peter was in a good enough mood not to bitch about anything. Instead, he sat back, looked smug, and put in only the smallest amount of effort required to find a partner.

Just. Saved. The world.

Meanwhile, there was a bouncy and overcaffeinated former lemur who was more than willing to snag a partner.

"Hey! 'Sup? Want some chocolate?"

Hi, Smug Peter. Meet Sugar High Topher. You two should get along.

"Oh sure, why the hell not," Peter said. Smugly. He grinned. "I see you're back to your old self again. Good work."

Edited 2011-09-09 16:05 (UTC)

"Yeah, you know, there's only so much time you can spend under Tony's bed before it gets gross."

That... was not how he had meant it at all. Too bad he missed the accidental innuendo entirely, handing over not one but two Super Caffeinated Chocolate Pops to Peter.

Peter... was going to be kind and eat one of the pops first before he answered that. "Oh, I have no doubt," he said. "You must have had a horrible time of it, you poor thing - all that wanking."

He'd get around to the assignment! ... once he was done being evil.

ASDIGHPAOSIDGHPAISHGOI.

"THAT," Topher announced when he was done flailing, holding up one hand with impressive fervor, "is not part of the assignment! So. We can just dispense with that topic right now!"

So... that was that!

"Sorry," Peter said, ever so honestly, really. "Just trying to figure out how much emotional trauma we're dealing with here. So... signs of evil. What are they?"

Well...

Oh. Right. Someone had been too busy eating chocolate and wiping his hands on his shirt to pay attention to the topic of the day.

So he improvised.

"Um." He licked his fingers. Uncouth or not, there was chocolate on them! "Sexual harrassment! That... would be one."

"What, like squeezing girls' asses on the workfloor?" Peter asked, pulling a face. Seriously - you'd think old geezers that high up on the food chain would have better things to do. "I'll give you that."

OR TALKING ABOUT SEX TO TOPHER, PETER. GOD.

"Not what I meant!" Ew ew ew. "Yuck. Okay." Cringing! Totally cringing. "Your turn."

Edited 2011-09-09 16:45 (UTC)

Oh, please. You could garble the word 'naked' around Topher and he'd still have a meltdown. Peter was just toughening him up.

"Overblown speeches about your own superiority?" suggested Peter, who only had those in his head.

"Good! But passing references to it are okay, right?"

...Just confirming.

"Unless you cackle," Peter said. "I'm sure cackling's bad."

Topher rarely cackled.

"Seems to be, yeah," he agreed thoughtfully, then munched on another pop. "How about... calling people fourth-graders just for having fun with gelatin?"

That was a particular grievance, yes.

"...I'd call that being an adult faced with a bunch of fourth graders," Peter said, "But maybe that's just me."

Wrong answer! Topher was looking for solid proof that Quinn was evil, thanks.

"What about threatening to pluck someone's hair off 'till they're bald?"

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