How To Avoid Misadventure, Monday, Period 4

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Class today met outside in the preserve, where students would find their teachers with a small pile of dead animals. And some not-so-dead, which were cocooned by what had to have been a giant freakin' spider.

Morrigan had needs, people. And sometimes that need was to be a very large scary spider and run around terrorizing the wildlife.

"Please don't pay attention to the barrel of creepy that Morrigan dropped off here," Alistair said, pointing at the cocoons. "We're doing a quick class on 'cooking in the wild' today. You can forego those things and take a dead one, by the way."

"How do they expect to eat, if they do not properly know how to kill an animal?" Morrigan argued, for what was probably the thousandth time knowing them. "'Tis only best they learn how to do it humanely now, rather than in the throes of hunger."

"There is a vast difference between hunting and killing your own food, and trying to get at it through-- did you squirt that out of your own--? No, ewwww, I don't want to know."

Morrigan rolled her eyes, picked up a cocoon, and sliced it open with a knife to reveal a sleeping rabbit. "So much for the famed Grey Warden bravery. See? They're fine."

She turned her attention back towards the students. "Since he needs his sword to compensate, Alistair can give you the basics of properly skinning. Over there, I have a batch of mushrooms, berries, and other plants that you can sort through, and I will assist you in knowing edible from deadly."

"Then you are on your own to cook dinner."

"I'm brave," Alistair replied, rolling his eyes, "I just don't want to root around in anything that's come out of your bottom, that's all."

... please ignore that bit, class.

"Right, first half of the class, over here with me. The rest of you can go bug Morrigan. Then we'll switch."

Just for that, Morrigan was going to shift in to her spider form and amble over to her baskets of goodies, taking a perch on a low branch so she could direct the students. If spider-eyes could be described as laughing at him, hers very much were.

[[OOC: You know the rules, wait for the OCD!]]

Comments

Sign-In

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

As the next Top Chef!

Re: Sign-In

[withasword.livejournal.com]

Kate Daniels

Re: Sign-In

[wwiii]

Warren Worthington III

During the 'Lecture'

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Hopefully you aren't vegan, because today is hands-on. While your teachers talk, take notes or chat quietly amongst yourselves.

Re: During the 'Lecture'

[wwiii]

Well... There were worse things Warren could be doing with his time than learning to skin a rabbit. He had a sneaking suspicion that if he didn't learn how to do it here, someone in Kaeleer was going to end up giving him a difficult time about it, sooner or later.

But still. Bunnies.

Re: During the 'Lecture'

[shes-got-legs.livejournal.com]

Ariel wasn't really vegan, though she was pretty sure this class was going to bring her one step closer to wanting to be.

And this was why she was now going to make sure she had plenty of Cheetos on hand when she went adventuring, yes.

Re: During the 'Lecture'

[i-am-the-rat.livejournal.com]

Hank was a confused jumble of "Whoa, that's awesome!", "Ew, that's gross!", and "Hey, that's mean!"

This was why, when he was stuck in the wilderness without food, he usually let Brock do all the hunting and cooking.

Re: During the 'Lecture'

[notmyownage]

Claudia really didn't want to learn to skin her own food. She wondered if she could get away with telling them she was going to be an urban adventurer. She could totally hunt for food when it meant dining and dashing at a greasy spoon or something.

Re: During the 'Lecture'

[glacial_queen]

Karla was mostly eying Morrigan's web. That was a lot of spidersilk. She could use some, too. She wondered if Morrigan would mind sharing.

Split Up!

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Half of you will go with Alistair to start, half with Morrigan.

Alistair: Group One

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Wait until he tags in!

Re: Alistair: Group One

[badnewsandwit.livejournal.com]

"Right," Alistair said, gesturing at the dead rabbits lying about (and... just trying to ignore the ones in Morrigan's arse-webbing, thank you very much). "Today, you're going to learn all about skinning a rabbit." He held up one of the rabbits, head-up. "This is going to get messy. You're going to want to empty the bladder first, before the urine spoils the meat..."

And it got worse sexier messier (http://dtulkin.posterous.com/how-to-skin-a-rabbit) from there on in.

"...and then you just peel away the fur," he finished. "After that, there's a few ways to chop it up. You're going to want to keep the fur as well. Never know when it's going to be useful for something, and it's always a waste to toss out too much of an animal."

He demonstrated a few quick cuts you could make to produce food, then finished it up with a, "And that's about it. Now it's your turn. Watch out so you don't get any blood on you - I am not messing you about about the messy."

Morrigan: Group One

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Morrigan was perched in a tree, still in spider form when the students came over. Baskets of various mushrooms, berries, and greens at the foot of the tree.

She waited for everyone to arrive before shifting back in a swirl of smoke. "The first rule is to cook everything she began. "To prevent mushroom poisoning (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mushroom_poisoning), mushroom gatherers need to be very familiar with the mushrooms they intend to collect as well as with any similar-looking toxic species. In addition, edibility of mushrooms may depend on methods of preparation for cooking."

She then went on to talk about which other plants (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_poisonous_plants) were also poisonous, as well as pointing out the safe versions. "'Tis a lot to learn, 'tis true, but 'tis something that should be learned."

Re: Morrigan: Group One

[wwiii]

Teacher was a giant spider wut?

That was going to kind of stay on Warren's mind while she went over what could and couldn't be eaten, but at least he was paying enough attention to not inadvertently kill anybody by just grabbing leaves and roots at random out of the woods.

SWAP

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Chat with your friends in passing, hope the next lesson is better than the previous one, and/or wish you'd picked another class.

Alistair: Group Two

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Morrigan: Group Two

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Morrigan was perched in a tree, although in her natural shape so that she could speak. Baskets of various mushrooms, berries, and greens at the foot of the tree.

She waited for everyone to arrive before shifting back in a swirl of smoke. "The first rule is to cook everything she began. "To prevent mushroom poisoning (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mushroom_poisoning), mushroom gatherers need to be very familiar with the mushrooms they intend to collect as well as with any similar-looking toxic species. In addition, edibility of mushrooms may depend on methods of preparation for cooking."

She then went on to talk about which other plants (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_poisonous_plants) were also poisonous, as well as pointing out the safe versions. "'Tis a lot to learn, 'tis true, but 'tis something that should be learned."

Cooking!

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Now it's your turn! Prepare your meat or your veggies under the watchful eyes of your teachers. Hopefully you won't try and kill yourself.

Re: Cooking!

[wwiii]

Warren looked at his rabbit carcass. And then at the veggies he'd gotten earlier. And then at his rabbit carcass. And then back to his veggies again.

"Does somebody want a rabbit?"

Yeah, his appetite was long gone.

Re: Cooking!

[walkswithcoyote]

Mercy quickly threw together some rabbit kebabs with native root vegetables and safe mushrooms.

Re: Cooking!

[notmyownage]

Vegetable soup. Right-o.

Talk to the Teachers

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

They're around.

Re: Talk to the Teachers

[badnewsandwit.livejournal.com]

Alistair was most certainly there. He was looking a little distracted, though. There was something in the air that just didn't feel right...

...Yeah, his Grey Warden senses were tingling.

OOC

[ofthe-wilds.livejournal.com]

Links may not be safe for the weak of heart, but it's nothing graphic.

Re: OOC

[badnewsandwit.livejournal.com]

And: first to ping in goes with Alistair first, Morrigan second; second goes with Morrigan first, and so on.