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fandomhigh2011-06-16 06:42 pm
mouthy-merc.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2011-06-16 06:42 pm
Entry tags:
Childcare for Idiots, Thursday
"Today we're gonna talk about a very important part of being a parent. Whether its via normal means like havin' a kid, or adopting, or ending up taking care of the messiah after an editorial decision kills off their entire town to make it more edgy... or the always nice 'I woke up with spawn and am pondering surgery to insure this never actually happens'," Deadpool said cheerfully. "Finding yourself a babysitter before you go insane."
Er. Insane-er.
"Now, with Jan here, this process involves Nate being all creepy big brother and possibly bugging people before trusting them with her."
A beat.
"Though his mom did watch her a lot. But that's only because she has those kooky godlike psycho-kinetic powers and a hunger for stars."
Thank you for that, Deadpool. Thank you.
"So I wanna see you brats break off into groups of two a decide what you need in a babysitter. Make sure to take into consideration your spawn's potential magic, mutations, and/or alien abilities. Because not even Mary freakin' Poppins wants to deal with that crap with no warning beforehand."
Er. Insane-er.
"Now, with Jan here, this process involves Nate being all creepy big brother and possibly bugging people before trusting them with her."
A beat.
"Though his mom did watch her a lot. But that's only because she has those kooky godlike psycho-kinetic powers and a hunger for stars."
Thank you for that, Deadpool. Thank you.
"So I wanna see you brats break off into groups of two a decide what you need in a babysitter. Make sure to take into consideration your spawn's potential magic, mutations, and/or alien abilities. Because not even Mary freakin' Poppins wants to deal with that crap with no warning beforehand."