fandomhigh | Childcare For Idiots, Thursday

"Now first we're gonna clear up a few things," Deadpool informed the class when they arrived. "Today is Thursday, not Saturday. As yesterday was Wednesday, not Friday. And if anyone uses autotune in my presence, I will have to murder you. Got it? Good!"

Ah, the start of a new day with Deadpool.

"Today we're gonna discuss how you need to supervise a kid at all times because sharp things always seem way nicer to run with and or put in your mouth when you're a three year old," he informed the class cheerfully. "Little known fact: grenades and a Dora the Explorer DVD gone missing equal the same amount of destructive force in a house. The more you know and all that crap."

Unfortunately, Jan wasn't listening to a damn thing concerning the lecture. She was, however, singing. Loudly. "Fri~day, Fri~day!"

Because it was an awesome song when you still thought My Little Pony was an amazing cinematic achievement. Without being stoned.

Deadpool ignored the singing, steaming on through that lecture. "Break off into groups of two and figure out what you have just laying around that's bad for kids. YouTube counts."

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And maybe her cookies were seen as cuisine on Jim's planet!

"They don't trust you to be able to handle it," Karla said, thinking back to a certain spanking she'd gotten from a certain head groom when she was very young. "They see you doing something that scares them and they figure you're too young, too immature, too stupid to do it properly."

Of course, in Karla's case, they'd been right. Just because she'd brought the horse back without injury to either of them had had very little to do with her control of the situation.

Hey, her cookies couldn't be any worse than some of the stuff that Jim's mother served at the Benbow. Mmm, food that wriggles.

"And you're not stupid. You're far from it. But it's just... what else is there to do? Settle for the bottom of the heap? If all you have in the world is what you can prove you're worth, then shouldn't you be able to get up and scream, 'I'm still here?' without people getting angry about it? Being young doesn't have anything to do with it!"

Okay, so maybe flying his surfer in restricted areas wasn't quite the same thing.

But it certainly made him feel alive whenever he did. He couldn't say that about the rest of Montressor.

Karla regarded him with a long look, thinking a bit about the conversation she had with Luke the day before.

"If you're looking for the cynical answer--and I don't have much else to offer right now--it's because most people like to live with their head down," she said quietly. "Without jumping up and demanding attention or even fighting for what it is that they want. Sometimes it's just easier to sit back and accept what you have instead of striving for what you can get. And most people who sit back and just accept don't like seeing someone else jump up. It destroys the illusion that there's no sense in trying."

"Well, too bad for them, then," Jim mumbled, frowning and tearing the corner from the top of a piece of paper in his notebook, rolling it around between his fingers into a little ball. "What else is living for, if you're not going to experience it?"

It seemed like one hell of a waste, to him.

Karla shrugged. "Let me know if you figure it out," she said.

Of the many, many words that could be used to describe her life, 'boring' wasn't one of them.

Childcare For Idiots, Thursday - 5/19

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