fandomhigh | Home Ec 2, Fourth Period 1/12

There were more than just brooms today, so hopefully the students wouldn't be as bored. "So," Steve said with a clap of his hands, "now that you've got your space tidied up, you need to clean it. And keep it clean. You should vacuum at least once a week," he said, gesturing to the vacuum cleaner in question. "Yes. Really. If you're from another timeframe, the vacuum cleaner may seem alarming--it's pretty loud--but don't worry, it can't hurt you unless you do something extremely inadvisable." No, he was not going to elaborate on what that might entail, or at least, only in the most roundabout of ways: he demonstrated how to use the hose and said, "Don't stick your fingers or anything you might want to get back soon in here for any reason. For the same reason, you should pick up cords and small objects like socks off your floor before you vacuum."

Moving right along, Steve expounded on the virtues of a feather duster versus a dustcloth versus those Swiffer things that he wasn't sure what they were made of but they picked up EVERYTHING (fascinating stuff, right?) and then on to, "Now let's talk about how to clean your space and not poison yourself!" with a cheerful clap of his hands. This was important. "First off, there are different cleaners for different surfaces," he said, gesturing expansively to the vast array of bottles on one of the tables. "In my day, we mostly just used bleach and soap, but now..." another gesture to the bottles. "The first thing you need to know is that you should never, ever, ever mix bleach and ammonia-based cleaners, because you'll poison gas yourself. Some cleaners can be flammable, or poisonous. Some can be harmful to the skin, meaning you'll have to wear gloves to use them. The most important thing to do, as with anything in life, is read the instructions. If you can't read the instructions or don't understand them, ask for help. Caustic burns are no fun. You'll also want to store your cleaning chemicals in a cool, dark place away from anything you might, say, eat." Sometimes with the teenagers he felt like he had to state basic logic like that.

"So, your assignment for class this week is to pair up and clean something in the classroom--" there were kitchen stations, so they had options beyond their desks or worse, mopping "--with at least one of these cleaners. Your assignment for the week is to dust your dorm rooms and clean the windows. And don't forget to sweep and tidy up!"

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Once he pings in.

Now Tony was going to think about how to make that vacuum more effective, Steve. Unfortunate? Oh, you better believe it.

"There will be no tinkering with school property, Mr. Stark," Steve said. No, he couldn't read his mind, he just knew him already. Also, it was less weird if he didn't call him 'Tony.'

"How can a school have hard light holographic projectors and these old things?" Tony had to ask.

LOOK AT THE AFFRONT TO SCIENCE, STEVE. LOOK AT IT.

"I don't do the purchasing," Steve said. "And they're perfectly functional."

They so were not. "I'm surprised they even work," Tony grumbled.

"Things don't have to be brand new and top of the line to do their job," Steve informed him, without much hope he would actually believe it.

"Well, no." Somewhere, Rhodey was proud of him for having said that. "But they have to actually work for more than a month."

But not that.

"They work fine, Mr. Stark."

"But they could work better!"

"Or they could explode." Guess which one Steve thought was the more likely outcome here.

Tony rolled his eyes. "Nothing I make explodes."

Other than what he made for Kuukaku's class. And his first attempt at repulsor gauntlets.

"You'll have to excuse me if I have some trouble believing that," Steve said wryly.

"...hardly anything I make explodes," Tony amended. "Did Mrs. Rhodes talk to you about things that didn't happen or is this other me really bad at building things?"

Mrs. Rhodes? "Neither of the above. I just believe in exercising caution." Unlike some people.

"Now you sound like Rhodey."

Steve had had his disagreements with Rhodey Rhodes over the years, but, "I'll take that as a compliment."

Tony rolled his eyes like the mature teenage genius he was. "So, could I borrow one of these?"

Say no if you value that vacuum, Steve.

Of course he rolled his eyes. This did not surprise Steve in the least. "I believe we already established that the answer to that question is 'no.'"

"For actual cleaning!"

"Then yes," Steve said, "you may borrow a vacuum cleaner to clean your room. But if it comes back in any condition other than how it left..." better to leave that threat open-ended, Steve thought.

Besides, it wasn't like he cared as much about a school vacuum as he had those times original flavor Tony tried to 'improve' Steve's classic Harley.

Tony was going to take that as a 'go ahead and ask for forgiveness later!'

Which is possibly how the other Tony took protests regarding that Harley. Sorry, Steve.

"Really?"

Yeah, Steve knew what was coming. He just wasn't going to bother to try stopping it any longer, because he knew when to pick his battles. "To clean your room."

Home Ec 2, Fourth Period 1/12

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