fandomhigh | Advanced Negotiations

Advanced Negotiations

Today we’re going to discuss this topic:

Slim odds: What do you do when there is a lot of them and very few of you.

I think we should split you up into small groups for discussion today. We could even turn this into a debate it you feel up to it.

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"Like ohmigawd! We could like totally braid each others hair and eat raw cookie-dough and have pillow-fights in out undies!" Jack took a small moment to laugh at the mental image. "That's because people are replacable apparently while machines? Notsomuch."

Jack smiled at the image of a random system lord (Baal) spinning in circles until he got sick. "Sounds like a really good trick."

Anakin had a mental image of the guys in the dorms braiding each other's hair and began laughing so hard he almost couldn't breathe. This school was so much more fun than the Temple.

"The 'oh the expense' lectures are especially hypocritical from an organization that's devoted to the worship and study of life," Anakin added. "And the floating thing really is a good trick. Lots of fun at parties. Although it certainly has less benevolent applications as well."

Jack tried to hold his laughter in but when Anakin cracked he couldn't help himself.

"You're tellin' me, it costs like seven hundred millio dollars to turn on the lights at the last place I came from. The floating trick probably can't be taught easily, can it?"

"Seriously. The run an intergalactic organization. Replacing a single Starfighter is, like, budget-dust to them." He yanked on his braid. "I think the whole 'no possessions' part of the Jedi Code is taken just a little too seriously by the beings working in the Accounting Office."

He let the pen drop back onto the desk. "Yeah, the floating thing is a bit of a Jedi mind trick. You kinda have to be born with the gift." He looked apologetic. "Sorry. I wish I could teach you how."

"See now I just wouldn't be able to do that whole no possessions thing, that'd be a deal-breaker for me."

Damn. "I was afraid you were gonna say something like that. Was worth a try though."

Anakin smiled. "When I joined the Jedi I was nine years old, so it wasn't like I owned anything anyway. When you don't have stuff to begin with, it's easy not to get attached to it."

He crossed his legs and shifted in his chair. "It never hurts to ask, right? Except if it's some kind of forbidden thing in a culture, and then we're right back where we started with the hostile beings and the misunderstandings and the lectures."

"Yeah I guess I can see that, you can't really miss what you never had."

"Nice segway. How do you really know what's going to offend someone though? I once went somewhere where the natives didn't have to piss and found it disgusting to the point of anger that we did. That was an uncomfortable four days."

Anakin grinned. "Thank you. And my old teacher said I never paid attention when he was talking." He sighed. "You really never know what's going to set someone off, do you? For us, the Archives are full of ten thousand generations of information on every group the Jedi have ever encountered. You can do some extrapolating based on similar government structures or species, but at the end of the day, the only way you find out is by making a mistake and learning from it."

He winced at O'Neill's story. "Never had that experience, thank goodness. We did run into a group who was offended we breathed oxygen, though. Talk about irreconcilable differences."

"At least you had that we were always going in blind and keeping our fingers crossed."

Jack blinked. Wow. "How the hell did you handle that?"

"Blind and with your fingers crossed?" Anakin winced. "That's the hardest way to go. I admire your courage."

He grinned. "We ended up sending transmissions back and forth from our ship, which was in orbit safely out of the range of their guns. It took nine months of negotiations to come to an agreement."

"It's not so much courage as it is blind devoation and stupidity."

"Wow. That was creative though. I think you deserve an A+ for that."

"It was mostly my old teacher's idea," Anakin said. "I was in favor of leaving, especially around month seven."

"I'd'a left after the first week probably."

Anakin snorted. "I wish." He looked around at the students packing up their bags. "I guess it's time for the next class. This has been fun, though."

"Huh, that passed quick. It was fun though. See you around."

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Advanced Negotiations

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