How to Be a Really Famous Actor (And Other Acting Tips), Friday, Period 1

[nosefullofsnot.livejournal.com]

As the students walked into the class, Lucas - still wearing his leather jacket, for the record - was standing in front of his desk, holding a skateboard behind his neck with one hand, staring down at his phone in the other hand, and laughing occasionally. "Ha ha. HipHopGroceries. That's a great hashtag. Flavor Flav-or-ice. I remember that stuff. I gotta retweet that." It wasn't until a little bit after the bell rang that he finally looked up at his class.

"Hey. How're you doing? Great? Good. I'm fine, bro, thanks for asking. This is How to Be a Really Famous Actor (And Other Acting Tips)," Lucas said, really pronouncing the hell out of those parentheses. "I'm Lucas Lee, but you knew that already. And if you didn't, what's wrong with you? Don't you like movies? Then why the hell are you here? Hopefully, it's because you want to be a really famous and probably good actor. Or maybe you want to be just an okay actor who's kind of famous with nerds and gets millions of twitter followers because they love when you talk about video games or something. Or maybe you just want to be a nobody who will never amount to anything more than local theater because you suck." He didn't have anything against local theater. He was just better than it. His bank account was proof of that.

Lucas put the skateboard on the desk, then pounded the desk with a fist for emphasis. "Well, this is the class for you! Except for the last person. Shove off, loser. We've only got time for potential superstars here. But those first two people are more than welcome to learn from me, a master of the craft. Also, if anyone wants to learn some sweet skateboard tricks, I'll be behind the school after classes. Bring your boards. I'll give coupons for some of the gear I sell from my skate company."

"We're going to start with some simple stuff today. Introductions..." Lucas paused until the drama had built up to its boiling point, "and improvisation. The first thing is when you tell me your name, your age, how much you love me, and something about yourself that you're going to repeat every time somebody does an article about you when you're famous. The second thing is when I pretend to care." Lucas laughed a little bit at his little joke there, but just enough to make it clear that it didn't have to be a joke if you sucked. "But then you also have to make up a character on the spot and introduce them the same way. Maybe I'll ask you some questions for your character to answer. Maybe I won't. I want to keep you on your toes."

Comments

Re: Introductions

[vanillajello]

"Kate Gregson, seventeen." Was that not the name she'd given someone in this class before? Too bad, she didn't care, and she was sure he wouldn't either. "And... I'm from Overland Park, Kansas. That's interesting because I'm way too awesome to be from there."

She was feeling a little better today, and that little statement just seemed to fit the tone Lucas was setting for the class.

Re: Introductions

[nosefullofsnot.livejournal.com]

"Kansas. Never been there," Lucas said. Why would go to Kansas? "But that's good. The public loves when famous people come from small towns in the middle of the country. It makes them 'relatable'-" Yes, he finger-quoted, "even when the famous person is a whole lot better than them."

Re: Introductions

[vanillajello]

"So, that's about the only thing being from Kansas is good for," Kate nodded. It wasn't much of a revelation, since she'd been thinking that for years and years now. "And I suggest you keep staying out of Kansas, it's no good."

Re: Introductions

[nosefullofsnot.livejournal.com]

"Thanks for the tip. Just don't say that in the press. People get touchy when they're near corn for too long," Lucas said.