http://ivejustinvented.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] ivejustinvented.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] fandomhigh2010-11-09 07:56 am
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The Mathematics of Quantum Neutrino Fields; Tuesday, Period 4 [ 11/09 ].

"I feel," Farnsworth said to his class today as things got started, "that today is a very good day to discuss a very important topic in the subject of Quantum Neutrino Fields, and that is what I like to call Let's Hope You're Not Your Own Grandfather."



"The Grandfather Paradox is a fun little quirk in the theory of time travel in which you are your own grandfather. Or grandmother in the case of you unfortunate ones who have female parts. Let's say, just for funsies, you wound up traveling back in time, accidentally, or perhaps intentionally, killed your grandfather, and then met your grandmother who, guess what, was actually a total babe. Unable to help yourself, you have a nice little fling with her and knock her up with, of all people, your father. Or, conversely, if one grandparent died, then one of your parents would never be conceived, and, therefor, unless you want to cease to exist entirely, you must man up and do the deed with your grandmother instead. Or perhaps you were meant to travel back in time and be your own grandparent the whole time, in which case not doing it will throw off the entire balance of the entire space time continuum.

"Luckily, there's a formula!"

Of course there was. And of course it was all seemingly nonsense, which probably wasn't helped by the fact that Farnsworth was discussing sex with your grandparents on a day like today.

"And before any of you tell me that this is impossible, I'd like to present to you Exhibit A." Here, Farnsworth pulled down a shade with the image of an awkward young man with red hair. "This unfortunate waste of human material actually somehow shares genetics with me, though I do not know and do not care to know which ones. His name is Philip J. Fry, and he is his own grandfather. He's my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great uncle, and I was there when it happened. Well, not there there, but in the past there, and I saw the morning after and it wasn't pretty. But, one could argue, as disgusting and immoral as it may be, without Fry doing to the nasty in the pasty with his own grandmother, I would not be here today.

"So what does this all mean for you? Well, we will be going to the Danger Shop for a simulated time travel space bar experience in which you will be thrown in with many other young nubile singles, some of who maybe your own relatives, some of whom may not be. It will be a hotbed of uncertainty and hormones as you try to figure out if this woman resembles that blue haired lush you call Nana or not, and if, by sleeping with her, you will be ruining your existence or ensuring it. Don't everybody get up at once, let's go."



Forget lectures on horrifying STD to scare a little bit of abstinence into these raging balls of USTs. Farnsworth was going to try to do it with Quantum Physics.

[[ wait for the ocd! ]]

[[ Previous Classes ]]

Re: Sign In -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] boho-to-be.livejournal.com 2010-11-09 02:35 pm (UTC)(link)
Christian

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] boho-to-be.livejournal.com 2010-11-09 02:37 pm (UTC)(link)
And now Christian had to deal with the sneaking horror that someone he'd met in this time was somehow descended from him. It wasn't his grandmother he was worried about, so much as his great-granddaughter, which might cause less of a paradox but was still distinctly squickworthy.

He tried to shake it off and look vaguely approachable.

vanillajello: (Talking to T.)

Re: Sign In -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[personal profile] vanillajello 2010-11-09 07:01 pm (UTC)(link)
Kate Gregson
vanillajello: (Standing.)

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[personal profile] vanillajello 2010-11-09 07:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, Kate was not going to look even as approachable as Christian. In fact, she was not going to talk to anyone. At all.

She was just going to lean against a wall and stare at her shoes.

Re: Sign In -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] knowsnokungfu.livejournal.com 2010-11-09 07:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Chuck Bartowski

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] knowsnokungfu.livejournal.com 2010-11-09 07:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Chuck was still twitchy because of whatever was in the air this week, and at the same time kind of creeped out by this whole exercize.

But he was at least trying to blend, and not think about the idea he might be related to the person he was supposedly trying to flirt with here. Because right now, he was liable to think that way, and it felt really, really wrong.

Re: Sign In -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] chic-harper.livejournal.com 2010-11-09 08:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Harper Finkle

Re: Sign In -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] onapalebicycle.livejournal.com 2010-11-09 09:51 pm (UTC)(link)
George Lass

Re: Listen to the Lecture -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] onapalebicycle.livejournal.com 2010-11-09 09:52 pm (UTC)(link)
George was pretty sure this wasn't even possible.

At least, she hoped not.

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] onapalebicycle.livejournal.com 2010-11-09 09:52 pm (UTC)(link)
George was giving off a "do not talk to me" vibe, as best she could.

While checking out the pretty people. She might be dead, but she wasn't .... hang on, what expression should you use if you actually were dead?

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] boho-to-be.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 01:40 am (UTC)(link)
Christian gulped, almost cartoonishly, before managing a smile for the redhead.

There was something about redheads ...

"I think I'd like that very much," he said. "Depending on what kind of drink."

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] boho-to-be.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 02:11 am (UTC)(link)
"Neither," Christian laughed back, bantering. "I just don't want to promise to buy you a drink and have you order something dreadful. It would wreck my image."

... he had no image.

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] boho-to-be.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 02:36 am (UTC)(link)
"I think just red wine," Christian answered, although not decisively. "I like the way it feels on the lips, don't you?"

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] onapalebicycle.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 02:48 am (UTC)(link)
"I ... am?" George said, raising her eyebrows at the newcomer.

George sucked at flirting.

"Okay," she said. "So what are you ... doing here?"

Sucked really hard. Seriously.

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] boho-to-be.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 02:53 am (UTC)(link)
"One of several," Christian said, gesturing to the bartender to place their order. "There's ... water on a hot day, too, isn't there?"

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] boho-to-be.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 03:10 am (UTC)(link)
"Oil," Christian said. "Fabrics ... I suppose you want me to say kissing, but I'm too clever for that."

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] onapalebicycle.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
"... Riiiight," George said. "Is that a pick-up line? It kind of sounds like one."

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] boho-to-be.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 03:28 am (UTC)(link)
"I didn't say I didn't appreciate a kiss," Christian said. "IO just think it isn't very clever to list that off first thing."

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] onapalebicycle.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 03:32 am (UTC)(link)
"Okay," George said. "I can't ... tell if I'm supposed to let you pick me up, or not."

The lecture had been a little unclear on that point. Never mind if she could tell if he was related to her. She tried to see if his face reminded her of Reggie's, but came up with nothing.

"... How old are you, anyway?"

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[identity profile] onapalebicycle.livejournal.com 2010-11-10 04:19 am (UTC)(link)
"Have you actually gone through puberty?" George asked.
vanillajello: (Idle talk.)

Re: Get your Time Travelling Flirt On -- M.o.Q.N.F., 11/09.

[personal profile] vanillajello 2010-11-10 07:04 am (UTC)(link)
"Yeah well everything above them is completely off limits for you, stranger," Kate drawled, eyes still on those shoes of her. "Move along."

Of course, she couldn't quite resist glancing up, briefly, and um. Hi, hot guy.

"And you're not getting my shoes either."