fandomhigh | DETENTION Saturday

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detention

DETENTION Saturday

ETA: ~~Mun jst got horrible news and will be AFK for a bit. I'm sure you can tell this is a pretty loose detention. Just don't blow anything up. I'll be back later to release you.~~ I'm back. Play this funny for me, ok? I need cheered up.

Visitors are welcome during LUNCH only.

The Danger Room has been programmed to resemble the press briefing room at the White House. On each chair is the student's name on an etched brass plaque. Make sure you only sit in the chair with your name on it.

At the ends of each rows are thick folders rubber banded to a large stack of books. Behind the lectern is a white pull down screen covering the seal of the United States of America.

CJ stands at the lectern, wearing her glasses. She looks up as the students enter the room and checks their name off the list.

Honor System, Gang. If YOU know you have detention, please serve it. Not all the teachers submitted information, or else there were late additions. Thanks.

demon_belthazor

joan_not_jane

kimberly_shaw

mparker16-

jayne_serenity

nightsmoonchild

teen_twin

2ls_in_oneill

chosenslayer_

psycho_jackass

future_visions

veronicamars1

egyptianlove

jayne_serenity

alchemy_4_arson

futurebucs_star

valentine_tart

sogothcally

Ok. It's Saturday. It's detention. I'm supposed to mention about your wicked, wicked ways...yeah, not going to do that. Work harder. Quit screwing around. In some misguided attempt to keep you all sane and alive I signed up for this gig, so let's make the best of a bad situation, and make CJ happy, ok? [She smiles]

All right gang, this is going to be as painless or as painful as you choose for it to be. I want you in groups of not more than four. You each have a different stack of information. These are reports that are sent to the government so we can decide what to give money to. We had an intern, Winnie, and she's read them all and briefed me on them.

Your detention, since most of you are here for not doing your homework, is to consolidate the information, come up with a coherant presentation, and then get up here and present your findings to the rest of us. If you do it well, single moms and garbagemen get to keep on making a living. If not, you damage the environment, poison the masses, and generally create hell on Earth and destroy our noble Democracy as we know it.

But first, we're going to watch a couple films to help orient you to politics as I know and love them.

[Walks to the back, flips off the lights, and starts an old fashioned reel projector. Footage of the Kennedy-Nixon debates flashes on the screen at the front of the room and the lights dim so they can watch.]

I will post sub threads for different detention activities through the day.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

First 4 to sign up. Your topic is--

Report on the economic feasibility of government subsidies for corn farmers and the wholesale marketing by the USDA of processed high fructose corn syrup.

*sits down at the Group 5 table, and motions for Anders to come over, before picking up one of the papers and starts reading*

*follows Cally over to the table and starts going through papers*

*is horribly distracted by the corners on the paper*

*starts folding over the corners of the papers*

*starts playing footsie with Anders under the table*

~~*wishes very hard for a pair of scissors to get rid of those frakking corners*~~

*reaches over and squeezes Cally's knee under the table*

. . . corn. This'd be a lot easier if I actually knew how this government worked.

[CJ comes over, with bunny!Logan in the crook of her arm. She's singing Little Bunny FooFoo to him]

Hey guys, do you have any questions?

~~Well, I was kind of wondering if it would be a problem for me and Cally to start making out under the table.~~

Well, uh. How much do I need to know about how the US government works to understand what I'm doing?

Have you read through that stack of source material yet, Anders?

I'm working on it. It's kinda a crash course for me though. Didn't really pay much attention to how Colonial government worked either.

When you get through the papers you ought to have a good enough grasp. Diligence, Anders. If Cally's a distraction, I'll seperate you two.

*gulps*

Yes ma'am. *reaches for the stack of source material and starts reading like a madman*

*shakes her head quickly*

Won't be a distraction at all, ma'am. We'll work very hard at ~~secretly cuddling~~ getting all this information sorted out. *nods*

Yeah, but it's not all that different, right? I mean, they have a president, and we have a president. But none of those guys in the movie were as cool as Adar, that's for sure. *fiddles with paper, sets one down in front of her and starts skimming it*

Wait... they're paying farmers to not grow corn? This is totally frakked.

To not grow corn? That doesn't make any sense.

*plays footsie some more*

Something about... *scratches the back of her head* how corn, otherwise, would be overproduced, and the farmers would starve or something. And that's why there's corn in almost everything.

'cause it's cheap, right?

*flips through a few more papers*

I guess that makes sense, sorta.

Yeah, sorta. But, it's like... weird. I don't get a system that pays people to not do things. I mean, could I get a subsidy thingy just to sit around and not do anything back at the colonies? No way.

So, the things at play here are corn farmers, corn prices, and corn products. I feel like I've got corn coming out my ears just from reading this.

Corn, corn everywhere . . . ~~That would hurt. Ow.~~

If I'm reading this right, there seems to be a problem with huge companies that can produce lots of corn for much less than, uh . . . family farms and stuff can afford to do.

*scratches his head* So it's like, they get paid money to not grow corn because it's driving the value down? Why can't they get paid to get equipment so they can grow stuff besides corn too?

Cause that would make more sense? Or maybe spend the money to create a better market for corn, or research other possible uses of corn so there's a need that meets the production?

*scratches her head, and starts playing footsie again*

I don't get it. If corn is this cheap there's gotta be a way to make, like, biofuel or something out of it. Can't they put money into researching that, and use all the extra corn for the research? Instead of paying people to not grow it?

*plays footsie back*

Biofuel... wait... *flips through some of the pages*

Hey, looks like they have a horribly under-funded and under-researched thing along those lines, actually. Ethanol. *scratches her nose*

So, should this be what we talk about? How pouring money into ethanol research?

Sure. I mean, the program's already there. It makes sense.

*shakes his head* Figures. Some things in governments don't change, I guess.

*reaches over and pats Anders on the shoulder*

Yeah, I guess so. Can always count on politicians to screw things up. Always thought it'd be better if, like, a school teacher or something ran things. Somebody who's not all about personal power and stuff.

*starts writing down some notes*

So, we're recommending that the entire subsidy system be slowly overhauled and fed into an Ethanol Research plan. Got it.

*thinks about the school teacher thing* You might be onto something there.

*plays footsie a little more*

Do we really want to say the entire system should be fed into Ethanol research, though? 'cause, I mean, aren't there other things it could go to, too?

Well, yeah, we wouldn't want to put all our eggs in one basket, sure. Investments to allow the small-business farmers to branch out or do things other than not grow corn should probably be worked in, too.

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