fandomhigh | Functional French, Tuesday, Period 2

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Functional French, Tuesday, Period 2

French class met around a large, circular table in the Danger Shop today, which had been programmed to resemble a bustling French bistro. Henry had to shout a little bit to be heard over the background noise.

//Welcome to the Bistrot du Coin//, he said. He'd decided this was the week he'd speak French for the entire class. //This is modeled after a real restaurant in Washington. I hope you're a little hungry even though this is a weird time for a meal, because your assignment this week is to order something off the restaurant's menu. Here's a vocabulary sheet for the day; the ~~moddable~~ waiter will be by in a few minutes. I'm getting the Confit de Canard, for what it's worth.//

//Make polite conversation while you eat, please.//

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//I think it does?// Emma shrugged. //Don't ask me how it works.//

//But is there nutrition?// Peter asked, thinking French was not the right language for this conversation. //Because this room could solve world hunger that way.//

Emma shrugged. //You'd have to ask whoever made it?// she suggested.

"It's so far beyond what is available at home, I try not to think about it too much, or I'll want to investigate where it came from, and if I can get a patent." Totally switching to English, because while Emma had a pretty good grasp on French, she didn't know the words for things like this.

//Good plan// Peter said, before switching to English himself. "I swear, for this thing to actually work there'd have to be a miniature nuclear reactor hooked up to it."

"Under the floor, maybe?" she speculated. "Or maybe giant hamster wheels, powered by gremlins."

"Well, if that's the case, we're going to find it hard to patent in our own universes. Gremlin power doesn't exactly translate well," Peter joked. //Care to tear the place up some day?//

//I am astonishingly adept with a crowbar,// Emma laughed, giving him a wink. //Just don't ask me to put it back together.//

Peter grinned. //Remind me to stay on your good side.//

He wanted that crowbar only used for good. //Though now I know who to get help from when I need to break and enter for prank.//

//Oh darling, I don't need the crowbar to get into places I don't belong,// she teased. //But staying on my good side is usually an excellent plan.//

//So what does it take to get into Emma Frost's good graces?// he asked, playing the smooth operator. //Hopefully there's no...// He paused, unsure of how to phrase it in French. Then he gave up. "Blood sacrifices involved. I've been burned on that kind of scheme before."

//Hardly. That would be tacky,// she replied dismissively.

"I simply require those around me to be intelligent, witty, and remarkably open-minded. Anything less, and a person simply isn't capable of keeping up with my whims."

"Good to know I have the resume," Peter said. "Assuming you don't dismiss open minds that come with a healthy dose of skepticism."

His smile was smug. Though this was usually the style of his smiles.

"Skepticism? For shame, Mr. Bishop," she scolded. "Next, you'll be telling me you don't believe in magic, aliens, or psionics!"

"I've met cases of all three," Peter said, gesturing with a finger. "Even skepticism will believe first-hand experience. Skepticism means you wait for proof, not that you outright disbelieve everything."

"All three, and we still haven't broken you yet? I must be slipping; I need to be more proactive in frightening the new and impressionable," Emma sighed. "Or did you encounter all this before you landed on our shores?"

"I can safely say that I encountered none of them before," Peter said. "But between Jool, Sookie, and Karla I've had plenty of new things to deal with. But you can only break what isn't flexible enough to bend with new situations."

Emma snickered, recalling what Sookie had said about Peter. "Sookie couldn't break a teacup without apologizing a million times, but if you've survived a bout with Karla's magic without your brain leaking out your ears, then you'll live."

"I'm glad to hear you're so flexible."

"It's something I pride myself in," Peter said, more than willing to keep up with this part of the conversation. "But I wouldn't say I completely understand Karla's talents. I do understand that they exist, though."

"Just keep that in mind if she ever starts trying to explain Kaeleer," Emma replied, eyes dancing. "I love my Sister dearly, but she's got a power to induce migraines in the male gender."

WHAT? SHE DID.

Peter nodded at that. "I'll keep it in mind. I tend to try and avoid any and all migraines. I get enough of one from Walter most wees."

"What is his thing with papaya, anyway?" she asked. "Everyone knows that mango is the superior fruit."

"I wish I knew," Peter said. "If I didn't like Sookie, I'd ask her to try and look into that mind of his. But I'm worried it might scar her for life."

"Why? Just because he's a little..." Emma waved one hand expressively. "It might be like a tilt-a-whirl ride, but he doesn't seem that scary."

"You missed the part where he started suggesting we start microwaving rodents instead of papayas so that we'd learn it wasn't just a wavelength that worked on fruit," Peter said, sticking with the example from what happened her on the island. The lab accident, that was still something he was reticent to share.

"Considering the high water content in most fruits, I would think it a safe assumption that anything that worked on the papaya would have similar results in most organisms with a similar tissue ratio," Emma put in dryly. "It's not rocket science."

She gave him a slightly crooked grin. "My best friend outside of Fandom is a bit of a mad scientist. Unless Walter starts vivisecting people, it takes a lot to weird me out."

Peter smiled. That demonstration of her knowledge was actually pretty impressive.

"I don't think we're in danger of that, yet. I hope."

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Functional French, Tuesday, Period 2

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