Adventures in Literature, Wednesday, Period Three [Class Sixteen]

[carpe_demon]

"All right, kids," Drake greeted the class. "It's time for your favorite part of a class, finals, the part where we make or break your grade." Who was he kidding, he was a softie, he'd pass everyone. "You've got three choices for essay questions and one hour to write it. Pick one, and on your mark, get set...go!"

He snapped his fingers, conjuring a blackboard with three questions written upon it:

A. What is so damn sexy about vampires? Feel free to use examples of people you know in Fandom or back home.

B. Pick two of the following characters and make them fight. Who would win? Robin Hood, King Arthur (not the one running around here, or he may sue you for libel), d'Artagnan, Achilles.

C. Quick! Invaders from Mars are on their way to destroy your town! What three books do you grab to take with you as you escape?


[Syllabus | Class Roster]

Comments

Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[carpe_demon]

Handwave, summarize, or write me a paragraph if you're bored. Feel free to pass notes or hand signal your fellow classmates. ;)

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[living_endless]

A. Nothing. They're pretentious and usually smell bad. It's a really lame way to cheat death.

B. I think Robin Hood beats everyone, because he's the only one who would fight dirty.

C. Alice in Wonderland, Confucius's Analects, and Heidi by Johanna Spyri.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[carpe_demon]

When Didi got her exam back later, Drake had written the following by answer #1 (in red pen, of course, as was traditional):

I think you're on to something here. The glittering ones -- that's totally scented body glitter to cover up the dead smell, isn't it???

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[icecoldfrost]

There was no way Emma could answer the first question with a straight face, or without getting in trouble with Jack if he ever found out. And since she didn't really want a migraine, that one was a no-go. And the second option was lame.

Which left the third option, which was really the only sensible finals question.

C. Frankenstein, The Iliad, Les Liaisons Dangereuses. I cover three genres, and three very different works, and I should be able to entertain myself for awhile.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[thatsamilkshake]

A) They're not.
B) Arthur. The one that's running around here. He won't sue me.
C) The Princess Bride, The Final Unicorn, and Elegant Waste (because it's the only book Katchoo likes).

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[oops-mbad.livejournal.com]

A. They're dark and edgy. Or at least they were 200 years ago. Now they just sparkle a lot. They're supposed to be dark and edgy though. And have an aura of fear around them.

B. Achilles had that unbeatable thing going for him. As long as no one got near his feet, he wins.

C. Three volumes of an encyclopedia - full of knowledge and doubles as a handy weapon.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[wantstodirect]

Tony picked the first question and wrote about how some completely hypothetical people might find strength and darkness in someone they could trust to be a turn-on. Plus, you'd have someone powerful to take your side in disputes and also, a little biting could be fun and he had mentioned that this was totally hypothetical, right? Good. And then he added a few sentences disparaging the sparkly sort of vampires.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[likethegun]

Sam picked the first option and wrote far more than necessary about fictional vs. real vampires, the allure of eternal life and kinky biting, and how the fictional versions would do nothing but set people up for disappointment.

Someone took the fight against sparkles as very serious business.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[formermayqueen.livejournal.com]

Cordelia giggled the entire time she wrote her first answer, and the other two were barely any thought at all.

1) It's the mystery of having lived for decades and having been a part of history while still looking young and hot. And the leather. Leather pants on a really hot body helps too.

2) Robin Hood and D'Artagnan, but Robin would win because he's not against cheating.

3)'The Complete Collected Poems' by Maya Angelou, 'The Sonnets' by Shakespeare and 'Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul'.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[bad-nose-job.livejournal.com]

A. What is so damn sexy about vampires? Feel free to use examples of people you know in Fandom or back home.

They're dark, beautifully mysterious, and certainly have that bad boy vibe that attracts most of us, unwittingly or not.

B. Pick two of the following characters and make them fight. Who would win? Robin Hood, King Arthur (not the one running around here, or he may sue you for libel), d'Artagnan, Achilles.

Robin Hood. No. Achilles. I'm sorry, I cannot seem to make up my mind.

C. Quick! Invaders from Mars are on their way to destroy your town! What three books do you grab to take with you as you escape?

The Dreamer, my journal (I consider this a very important book, indeed), and The Princess Bride.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[yakkoyaks.livejournal.com]

Yakko chose to write about C.

He ended up choosing The War of the Worlds (because of the subject matter), The Complete Miss Marple (the world record holder for thickest book, having a 12.6" spine) and The Alien Invasion Survival Handbook: A Defense Manual for the Coming Extraterrestrial Apocalypse (obvious reasons).

He somehow wrote eight pages on this within the allotted time.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[she-sheds.livejournal.com]

Joolushko had originally chosen question A but after several paragraphs essentially saying "because this planet is stupid and its people somehow think dead things make good mates" she opted to neatly cross those out and move on to question C. Naturally, her three books didn't even exist on this planet though she did at least describe them in some detail to justify her answer.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[onlysmokesnics.livejournal.com]

A. Is Elvis a vampire? I don't know. I don't think I know any. That lady that came in was pretty, though. But I don't really know her.

B. d'Artagnan versus Robin Hood. They're gonna wrestle. In oil. And the winner is the crowd!

C. Three books on how to kill Martians. D'uh.

Re: Take the Exam [Ail: Class Sixteen]

[glacial_queen]

B. Milady. Achilles spends too much time whining. Plus, she could take him to bed and stab him in the ankle and no one would be the wiser. King Arthur can't make up his own mind about what to do about his wife and best friend and would probably need someone to hold his hand the entire time. Also, Milady could take him to bed and murder him in his sleep. And if he's anything like his namesake here, he's an utter jackass. Robin Hood might be a match for her in cunning, but his innate 'chivalry' would probably blind him to her intentions until it was far too late.

And D'Artagnan was an idiot. As an appropriate citation, please see The Three Musketeers.