Adventures in Literature, Wednesday, Period Three [Class Six]

[carpe_demon]

Drake had recreated the walls of Troy around his desk this morning. Whether it was purely for atmosphere or to protect himself from Karla was anyone's guess. He was also snapping his fingers to change the attire of each student as they arrived so that everyone looked much like the cast of Troy, only with less oily muscles and abs because Drake didn't have a death wish, thank you very much. There was also a large wooden horse tucked in a corner with a sign around its neck saying "There are no Greeks here, move along."

"If you read the Iliad or the Spark Notes," Drake began, "you're probably expecting a lecture about the major themes of the Iliad, including kleos, meaning glory earned in heroic battle, or the concepts of wrath or fate. If you watched Troy, you're probably wondering if Patroclus and Achilles were really just cousins." He paused. "OK, that second one I'll answer -- they were cousins all right, but more than just kissing ones, if you know what I mean. Brad was just afraid if he started kissing boys on screen that Angie would like it too much. Anyway! I'm going to skip over that first part, though, and get down to the main theme of the Iliad: men are dumb.

"The Iliad, as told by Homer, covers the last year of the Trojan War. This war began after Eris, the Goddess of Discord, decided to shake things up by making a golden apple inscribed 'For the Fairest.' The goddesses Athena, Hera, and Aphrodite all laid claim to it, and Zeus wisely decided he didn't want to get into the middle of that heavenly catfight. So he picked Paris, a prince of Troy, to decide who got the apple. Each of the goddesses tried to bribe Paris -- Hera offered to make him a king, Athena offered wisdom and skill in warfare, and Aphrodite offered him the love of the most beautiful woman in the world, who just happened to be Helen, wife of King Menelaus of Sparta. Paris was thinking with something other than his head and chose Aphrodite -- who should've won anyway without bribery, being the Goddess of Love and Beauty, but hey, I didn't write the thing.

"So in one fell swoop, Paris pissed off two goddesses and the entire Greek kingdom, kidnapped a woman, and started a war that lasted ten years and ended with his father and brother being killed and his kingdom destroyed. Dumbass is not a strong enough word. I'm all for love and fighting for it, but this really can't be called a love story. And to be fair, Paris wasn't the only dumbass in the story. The Iliad starts with a priest of Apollo, Chryses, demanding the return of his daughter, Chryseis, who Agamemnon had claimed as a war prize. Aggie refused to give her up, so Apollo came to his priest's aid and inflicted a plague on the Greeks. Achilles compelled Agamemnon to return Chryseis, so in a fit of pique Aggie took Briseis, Achilles’s war-prize concubine, for himself, causing Achilles to withdraw from the war. Then Patroclus dresses himself up as his cousin to lead his men into war and gets himself killed by Hector, Achilles kills Hector, there's a horse involved, Troy falls, he dies, she dies, everybody dies. And throughout the story, the sister of Paris and Hector, Cassandra, keeps trying to tell them they're all going to die, but no one believes her because Apollo cursed her when she rejected him.

"So for today's discussion, you can either go back to the beginning and put yourself in Paris's place: what do you do with the apple?" He snapped his fingers and conjured up a trio of women in white gowns. "Aphrodite, Athena, and Hera await your decision. Or you can pick a character and either justify their actions or pick who you think that character believes to be the biggest idiot and why. Feel free to choose any character, except for two. Karla, you're Helen, and Gabrielle, you're Cassandra. Mostly because I think I'm funny."

[Syllabus | Class Roster]

Comments

Sign In [AiL: Class Six]

[carpe_demon]

With a face that will launch a thousand ships.

Re: Sign In [AiL: Class Six]

[icecoldfrost]

Emma Frost

Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[carpe_demon]

Who's the winner of the No Brain Award?

Drake was totally conjuring up popcorn when it was Karla's turn to speak.

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[onlysmokesnics.livejournal.com]

"Gee, I wouldn't mind having a golden apple, myself," Hayley said, adding her stellar commentary on the matter.

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[cutsthestrings.livejournal.com]

Fiona looked like she thought everyone was stupid (in the story) but she picked one after a few minutes.

"Discord. I think she thought Paris was the dumbest because he actually accepted the job instead of ducking out. What kind of moron puts themself in line to piss off two goddesses?"

Really.

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[icecoldfrost]

"The award goes to Zeus, for thinking that it would all be OK if a mortal did the choosing," Emma replied acidly. "If he'd had half a brain in his head, he should have known there would be a divine temper-tantrum no matter who did the deciding."

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[thatsamilkshake]

"I think the three goddesses were dumbest for making him choose. If they shared they could all be the fairest."

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[awakestheghosts]

"T-they s-shouldn't have made him c-choose," was Chloe's opinion on the whole thing.

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[shyest-eyes.livejournal.com]

"Did he h-have a timelimit to choose who got the apple?" Hinata asked, frowning. "If I w-were him and I had the three of them upset with me, I would f-find away to put off the choice until I were dead and my choice no longer mattered."

"O-Or pick someone not of the three," she said, staring at her desk. "And claim th-that as they were goddesses I could not choose between them being mortal and u-unworthy."

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[stylin-wizard.livejournal.com]

"Paris shouldn't have accepted that task," Alex shook her head. "He should avoided the whole thing and told Zeus to choose someone else."

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[ancientbschamp.livejournal.com]

"Paris was an idiot," Gabrielle announced immediately. "Speaking from first-hand experience. Pretty, but an idiot."

Wait a second.

"WHY DID WE GET CUT OUT OF THE STORY? The next time I see Homer, oh, I'm gonna . . ."

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[oops-mbad.livejournal.com]

"Wow, they're all young." Diana blurted out, completely on topic there, really.

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[living_endless]

Desire was dumbest; it had been the one to prod Eris into making the apple and Zeus into letting a mortal have it.

But this wasn't Didi Talks About Her Family Hour, so ...

"If I'm Paris I toss the apple into the ocean. It's really not a game a mortal should get into the middle of."

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[glacial_queen]

Who was Karla to deny Drake popcorn? Besides, she did a lot of outside reading to understand events leading up to the Trojan War that she wanted to rant about.

She stood, taking in her Greek raiment with a smile. "I would have to say that of everyone in the story, it is Priam--noble, honest Priam--who is the biggest fool." She gave a little moue of distaste. "It's hard not to choose Menelaus for not leaving me better guarded when he was away, but he did have the oaths of the other Greek kings. And Paris is a child in an adult's body. He is promised a pretty thing by a goddess and he lack the wit to understand what consequences that possession of that bauble will bring." Scathing Karla is scathing. "But while he is probably the most stupid, I believe that the foolish actions of those who are smarter than Paris could ever hope to be hang heavier in the balance. Besides," she added with a sardonic quirk of her lips. "I'm pretty sure I love him through most of the story. It makes it hard for me to grasp just how fundamental stupidity is to his very nature."

"Priam, though, for all I came to care for him and look upon him as a father, much off the fault of the war could be laid at his feet. He had been warned that Paris would bring devastation to the kingdom and the Apollo's own priestess warned Priam to kill the infant Paris as he is born. I can understand his refusal to murder his own child, but rather than simply defying the prophecy, he gives orders to a herdsman to kill Paris. So it's not the act he objects to, but sullying his hands with Paris's blood. And he doesn't even have the decency to watch the deed be done. So he has no one to blame when Paris lives and comes back to cause trouble."

"Furthermore, when I was abducted by Paris--though if Aphrodite was involved, I almost certainly went willingly--Priam could have refused Paris entrance into Troy. Or forcibly separated the two of us and returned me to my husband, before he showed up with the armies of the Greeks. At any time, he could have left Troy to go to the Greeks' tents and taken me with him, throwing both of us on the mercy of my husband. He could go to Achilles and beg for Hector's body back, why couldn't he do the same for peace and the lives of his people? Assuming Paris is too stupid and I too besotted to do the right thing, it was up to Priam, as ruler of his people, to do what is best for them. So why didn't he? Pride? Kleos? A desire to make up for abandoning Paris as a child? Obliviousness to the best and only solution to the problem? Hell's fire--they have a chance to rid themselves of me when Menelaus beats Paris in combat. The only reason he lives is because Aphrodite spirits him away. Both wisdom and honor dictate that the agreed upon spoils of that battle--me--should be delivered to Menelaus after that victory. In the end, Priam is king and his failure to do his duty, for whatever reason, leads to the death of his people, his children, and his city."

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[awesomebigsis.livejournal.com]

"Zeus," Ellie said with a shrug. "For making someone else choose. Isn't he supposed to be king of all the gods or something? He shouldn't have just bailed on the whole thing."

Re: Class Discussion [AiL: Class Six]

[she-sheds.livejournal.com]

"I have to choose just one who was stupid?" Joolushko was not convinced that such a choice was even possible.

The Apple of Discord [AiL: Class Six]

[carpe_demon]

The goddesses have made their offers and await your decision.

And yes, the ladies in question look familiar to some -- Phoebe = Aphrodite, Paige = Athena, Piper = Hera.

Re: The Apple of Discord [AiL: Class Six]

[onlysmokesnics.livejournal.com]

"Can I keep it?" Hayley said. "I want to keep it."

Re: The Apple of Discord [AiL: Class Six]

[glacial_queen]

"Well, what will you give me, the most beautiful of mortal women, in exchange for my vote?" Karla asked, managing not to snicker as she said it. It was an impressive feat, really.

Re: The Apple of Discord [AiL: Class Six]

[formermayqueen.livejournal.com]

Cordelia stared at the goddesses for a moment and shook her head. "I don't know if any of them deserve it, so why not split it in three?"

Re: The Apple of Discord [AiL: Class Six]

[ancientbschamp.livejournal.com]

Gabrielle would happily tell anyone who came up to her that they were going to die. Well, at the moment she would -- but her expression said plenty of that for her.

This was so not how it went.

Talk to Drake [AiL: Class Six]

[carpe_demon]

He said all good things about you to your families, promise.

Re: Talk to Drake [AiL: Class Six]

[living_endless]

"My sister liked you," Didi informed him. "Well, actually she said you smelled like a memory of a daffodil but with funny froggies, but I'm pretty sure that's good."

Talk to the TAs [AiL: Class Six]

[carpe_demon]

When they ping in.

Re: Talk to the TAs [AiL: Class Six]

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Joan was around.

OOC [AiL: Class Six]

[carpe_demon]

Oh, those wacky Greeks.

Re: OOC [AiL: Class Six]

[cutsthestrings.livejournal.com]

I love that icon.