fandomhigh | a guide to getting past life's little quirks | wednesday | period 2

The class was taking place in the Danger Shop today and Loki kind of couldn't wait for this lesson. He waited till everyone arrived, got settled before he started talking.

"Welcome back," he started, nodding at them all. "Hope you all had a wonderful fucking weekend and no one's melted because of the fucking heat."

It was fucking hot, man.

"Anyway, today, we're doing something that should be fun." For him. "And you all should, at one point or another, have to deal with this. Whether you're a guy or a girl, you're all going to have to slink into a store one night and buy condoms. Or maybe you'll have to buy fucking your mom some new underwear. Or, if you're really fucking lucky, some adult diapers. Yes, children, buying shit that embarrasses you is a fact of fucking life. Best to get over it now before because it's going to fucking happen and turning a bright shade of fucking red because you're embarrassed is not going to fucking help."

It'd just be amusing.

"The easiest thing to do just do it quick," he continued. "Find the item, buy it, make no fucking eye contact with the clerk and leave. Of course, this might be difficult if the clerk starts talking to you and you don't want to be a rude shit and ignore him or her. Then, you have to suck it up. There's also the 'buy lots of shit and hide the embarrassing thing in the middle' trick. If you buy a shit ton of mundane stuff, maybe you can lull the clerk into not thinking anything of your embarrassing purchase, right? Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes it just puts more focus on your embarrassing item. You could also try to make someone buy it for you. In this class, you're not going to get to do that but if you find someone that doesn't give a shit about buying stuff like that, then you're golden."

Loki grinned because this activity was going to be awesome.

"Today, you're all going to be buying something embarrassing," he said. "I've assigned items and it's your job to buy the thing, pay for it and get out of the store without stuttering or blushing like a fucking idiot. Sound easy? I guess we'll see, right? Get going."

Loki stood back and waited for the the first student to take their turn.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

Like you're embarrassed!

Talk to each other, stare, take notes, wonder what in the hell Loki might make you buy.

Buy your embarrassing item!

Agnes - Athletic Cup (http://www.nuttybuddy.com/)
Blysse - Douche (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Douche)
Edmund - Adult Diapers (http://www.staydryproducts.com/)
Effy - Celine Dion CD (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000031XCR/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_2?pf_rd_p=304485901&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=B000002BHE&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=09V36SYFZWWXVY8BW73V)
Elena - Laxatives (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laxative)
Elle- Beano (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beano_%28dietary_supplement%29)
Emmett - Viagra (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sildenafil)
Fiona - Pregnancy test (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pregnancy_test)
George - Tampons (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tampons)
Griff - Granny panties (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=granny+panties)
Helen - Preparation H (http://www.preparationh.com/)
Jaina - Pubic Hair Dye (http://www.bettybeauty.com/)
Jenny - Monistat (http://www.monistat.com/)
Layla - Lice Kit (http://www.quitnits.com/head_lice_product_info/complete_lice_treatment_kit)
Prince Edward - Extra small condoms (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Condom)
Tara - Valtrex (http://www.valtrex.com/)
Yuffie - Genital wart medicine (www.genital-warts-help.org/genital_warts_medicine.html)
Zack - Risky viewing material (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pornography)
___

[Feel free to handwave OR ping in and I'll play a clerk for you!]

Edited 2009-08-12 11:04 (UTC)

Who hopefully don't embarrass easily!

He's so so so fucking amused.

I may have had too much fun coming up with those things to buy. And just ignore that I have the wrong thing in the class activity subject header. Stupid auto complete that I didn't notice.

Edited 2009-08-12 11:46 (UTC)

Effy Stonem

Layla Miller

Layla shook her head in amusement.

She didn't bother to take any notes.

Layla came up and slapped the lice kit down on the counter. "Yeah. I need it, Okay?" she said angrily. "This shit works right? By the looks of you, you should know."

She might be trying a different tactic.

The young girl at the register was smacking her gum and watching Layla with wide eyes.

"There ain't no reason to be rude, honey," she drawled, tone sweet. "And I wouldn't know, never used it. Haven't ever had the problem. Must be tough for you."

"Just ring the fucking lice kit up," Layla snapped. "And no fucking price check over the store intercom. If you don't know the price you can damn well get your lazy butt from behind the counter and walk to the aisle to find it."

Effy, wasn't one of those easily embarrassed types. She really, really wasn't.

And if anything was going to get her, it was someone touching on any emotions she might have buried in there somewhere, not making her buy condoms. She was feeling pretty confident of this one. Because that was so unusual for her. Really.

The girl continued smacking her gum and just eyed Layla, sizing her up. She'd had rude customers before but seriously.

"Them little buggers must be working their way into your brain and destroying all your politeness," she said. "I ought to just toss you out since you can't seem to show any respect. I'm sorry about your lice but gee whiz, just calm down. It can't be that bad."

Effy eyed the CD skeptically as she went up to pay for it. Looked like something her mum would buy. Ew.

She just glared across the counter, almost daring them to make comment.

"Interesting selection," the bored guy behind the counter said, picking it up. "Got a hot date tonight?"

The sarcasm was strong with this one and he'd been glared at enough that it just rolled right off him.

Edmund Pevensie

Edmund put the adult diapers on the counter, wondering (not for the first time) why on Earth he was taking this class. He didn't say anything to the clerk, preferring instead to go for the silent treatment.

Zack Fair

The girl behind the counter had been reading a magazine but when she saw Edmund and Edmund's purchase, she stopped to stare.

"Well, that's all right, hon," she said, trying not to laugh. "We all have our little problems."

Why yes, this was the first time in Zack's life he had ever held porn in his hands.

Zack Fair. Holding porn. It was going to take a moment to let that realization dawn before he shimmied toward the counter with it. No eye contact. None. Except he couldn't not make eye contact and avoid looking at the porn at the same time.

Damn it!

Okay. Fine. Eye contact.

"Hiya," the guy said, noticing Zack's discomfort and deciding to try and press that little button some more. Look, he was a damn clerk and he was bored. Had to get his fun where he could. "Virgin?"

He meant to buying porn.

"Nnn-Yy..." How do you answer a question like that?!

Consider the little button pressed, counter-guy. Zack was now not only twitchy, he was blushing a little as well.

So he shrugged. See? He totally didn't know if he was a virgin. Except, that wasn't quite right, either.

"I have no time for this," Layla replied as she pulled out her money and tossed it on the counter and then snatched the lice treatment box. "Keep the fucking change."

"Wow, must have been quite the experience to leave you confused," he said, checking out Zack's purchase and slowly ringing it up. "Tab A goes into slot B, if that helps. The porn should help too. There's all sorts of slots in there."

Page 1 of 7

a guide to getting past life's little quirks | wednesday | period 2 | august 12

sign in [llq 08/12]

chat | stare | take notes [llq 08/12]

class activity | alcohol management [llq 08/12]

the ta's [llq 08/12]

loki [llq 08/12]

ooc [llq 08/12]

Re: sign in [llq 08/12]

Re: sign in [llq 08/12]

Re: chat | stare | take notes [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | alcohol management [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrrassing item buying [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrrassing item buying [llq 08/12]

Re: chat | stare | take notes [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrassing item buying [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | alcohol management [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrassing item buying [llq 08/12]

Re: sign in [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | alcohol management [llq 08/12]

Re: sign in [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrassing item buying [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | alcohol management [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrassing item buying [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrassing item buying [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrassing item buying [llq 08/12]

Re: class activity | embarrassing item buying [llq 08/12]