Ethics & Etiquette - 1st Period - 7/20

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

There was a space cleared today and a boombox. No, Deadpool wasn't planning on a Say Anything moment, mostly because he hated Peter Gabriel. Hated him so freakin' much.

"Gooood mornin' kids! I'm Deadpool--" He paused, staring at his co-teacher expectantly.

"And I'm Captain America?" Steve said, his expression suggesting he wasn't sure that was what Deadpool wanted him to say, but he was willing to run it up the flagpole.

That worked! "And together we fight crime." A beat. "Wait... no. Just teaching. I don't think we've ever had a crime fighting team up. Well, other than that one time there was time travel involved and I think you were dead then."

Steve stared at him for a moment, then said, "Right. Of course. That time."

Hey, he was used to that response! And it wasn't his fault they were both pulled from before that happened. And that it was slowly being retconed by bad writers to create a new Wolverine. He blamed Ryan Reynolds.

"Today we'll be talking about how to behave out on the dance floor. No bumpin' and grindin' like you kids do and making sure to leave room for Jesus. Which is kinda pervy if you ask me, but hey. Who am I to judge?"

Steve didn't understand what Jesus had to do with it, but, "Dancing is, of course, important to know at least the basics of in many social situations. There are so many different types of dance I'm not even going to try to list them, but they all have their place."

"Now, when asking a girl--or boy, I don't judge unless it's funny--to dance, you want to be aware of their feelings and act as politely as you can." A beat. "Just drag 'em caveman style out onto the dance floor, I say. But first say something that makes no sense like 'Nobody puts baby in the corner' even though you're a good ten years older than them. You perv. I know what you all are thinking. And it's wrong. Twisted and wrong and you're all going to go to hell for it. Especially you," Deadpool said, picking someone at random. Because it was more fun that way.

Steve didn't know what to do with that, so he did what he'd found worked best with Deadpool: ignored it. "And now, since it's kind of silly to just talk about something instead of doing it, it's time to dance."

Pushing play on the boombox, they were graced with the soothing tones of The Spice Girls.

Deadpool made a face. "Okay, I'm killin' Tasky for this."

Steve looked horrified, but not undermining his fellow teacher's plans was part of his plan for getting through this class with as much of his sanity as possible. "Everyone dance to this...music," he said faintly. "I think we have a trophy for the best dancer. Don't we?"

"I made it myself!" Fear for your safety children. Fear. It was a discoball glued to an old bowling trophy and it might give you lockjaw. And not even the cool dog Lockjaw!

Comments

Wait to Dance/Talk

[mouthy-merc.livejournal.com]

Mock others, wonder about your teacher's sanity...

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[decoder-rings.livejournal.com]

Oh god, dancing. Dancing was ABOVE singing on his scale of 'things he did not want to do and yet seemed to do a lot.' He was just going to try and wallflower it up, yes.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[tasenburn.livejournal.com]

"... what the hell?" Elle tilted her head thoughtfully. "This song kind of begs for bumping and grinding, honestly."

She looked at Hannibal. "So! Sitting here and pretending we're invisible sounding like a good plan?"

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[decoder-rings.livejournal.com]

"That's my plan," Hannibal agreed with a quick nod. "I dance at dances at that's only with a lot of persuasion. Not dancing here."

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[tasenburn.livejournal.com]

"I haven't danced much, but this is so not the song I'm gonna change that with."

It was quite possibly one of the first times she was glad she'd been so isolated at the Company.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[trigons_child]

Raven stared, wide-eyed. She knew nothing of dancing and did not think it a good idea to stat learning.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Joan was... mildly amused by all of this. After the campfire performance last week, nothing was going to phase her.

But she noticed her friend's shell-shocked look. "Rachel? You okay?"

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[trigons_child]

"I have never danced," Raven said, which was shocking news, of course.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Yes, Joan was surprised to hear that. Or not.

She smiled. "It's not that hard. You can probably get away with just bouncing a little in time to the music. Maybe waving your arms around a little."

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[trigons_child]

"I have seen how people dance to music like this," Raven said. "I cannot do that."

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

"You don't have to," Joan assured her. "There are all kinds of dancing."

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[guardianborn.livejournal.com]

Right. Dancing. This was better than setting a table, true, but then the teachers reeeally needed better taste in music.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[tasenburn.livejournal.com]

"... Now can I stab someone with cutlery?" Elle asked with a pout.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[guardianborn.livejournal.com]

"Depends on who," Rose said instantly. "Don't get any of the hot ones in the face."

Cause that would just be a shame.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[tasenburn.livejournal.com]

"Well, that kind of goes without saying."

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[guardianborn.livejournal.com]

"You know, you'd think that," Rose said. "And yet..."

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[puppy_fair]

Zack was grinning again, yes. Dancing! Dancing, he could do!

Or, at least, he could make looking like an idiot look fun.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[life_inshadow]

Tara was wondering, if she concentrated very hard, if she could turn the color of the walls.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[flashesforinfo.livejournal.com]

Oh, this was definitely better than the singing, even if she wasn't really sure what they were dancing to (part of the decade or so she'd missed out on) she could still dance.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[jommetry.livejournal.com]

So far Esme seemed to be spending every class this time either frowning in disbelief or standing there with her arms folded. Or like now, both at once.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[awesomebigsis.livejournal.com]

Dancing was more preferable than singing, but Ellie still had to wonder about this class.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[1moredaytodance.livejournal.com]

Dancing? This just wasn't fair. Well, very fair to Eva, but not fair to her fellow students.

Eva was ready to go from the minute he put on the Spice Girls.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[icecoldfrost]

Emma wasn't quite sure what dancing to the Spice Girls had to do with etiquette; ballroom seemed more suitable, but she had long since given up expecting this class to make sense.

Considering this was only the third week, that probably wasn't a good thing.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[finding-x-dream.livejournal.com]

Agnes turned pink and tried to melt into the wall. That didn't seem to be working.

Re: Wait to Dance/Talk

[fabulous-secret.livejournal.com]

Adora loved to dance! Sadly, she was not wearing a party dress for the occasion. Nor did she bring her chipmunk prince with her. Woe.