fandomhigh | Survive Your Own Cooking - 3rd period

Today Deadpool was in mittens and had a nice, warm hat on. It wasn't cold enough to warrant that, really, but he thought it helped the class.

And it insulated his hands when touching hot things! It was a win/win.

"So, the days are getting shorter and chillier and you know what we all want to eat around this time of year?" A beat. "Other than donuts. Or fried chicken. Or turkey."

He could really keep going on this.

Deadpool shook his head. "Soup! I meant soup! The kind that is a bubbling cauldron of deliciousness that sits on the stove for hours on end! With bits of animal bones in it and smells vaguely of many a spice."

Now he wanted the damn soup.

"So, we're going to us that skill with boiling water today kiddos! You split up and pick what kind of stock you want your soup base to be--because we don't have the time to get you to make your own, even though Alton Brown is rolling in his grave with Betty Crocker-- and then you can make whatever soup strikes your fancy!"

A beat.

"But not Gazpacho. Even though it's delicious. It's a cold soup and that defeats the entire purpose."

He cleared his throat. "Try not to scald yourselves horribly during this!"

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"Just smile and nod, kiddo. Smile and nod. Nooothing here makes sense, why would I?"

"Because you're a teacher?" Hurley said.

Foolish boy.

"...something like that," Deadpool said slowly.

"Okay," Hurley said. "I guess that's... all I can, like, expect."

"Well, that and for me to not throw soup at you," Deadpool replied cheerfully. "Because that would hurt."

"Owww," Hurley said. "Yeah, please, like, no soup throwing. Thank you."

I'll try my best to resist." But now it was so tempting. All soupy and throwable...

"Though a class that's just a giant food fight?" Hurley said. "That would be cool."

Deadpool considered this. "Maybe for the final..."

"Dude. I will bribe you," Hurley said. "Because that would be the best thing ever."

"...bribe with what?"

This intrigued Deadpool.

"Uhhhh... I can... bake?" Hurley said.

"Is it edible?"

"Yes," Hurley said. "I just kinda... am messy."

"How about some nice, safe, pie then?" Deadpool asked after a moment.

"Done," Hurley said. "What kind?"

"Surprise me!"

That was just asking to get something gross.

Except Hurley wouldn't do that.

"Deal," he said. "Thanks, Mr. Teacher-dude."

Survive Your Own Cooking - 3rd period - (10/01)

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