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how not to get killed

How Not To Get Killed - Tuesday - 3rd Period

The Danger Shop was white and sterile, like a laboratory – a likeness that was quickly confirmed by the lit-up "Aperture Laboratories" sign over a section of the seemingly blank wall.

"Good morning, everyone. Today for your final you'll be running a maze of sorts," He said motioning to the wall where a blue portal appears under the Aperture sign. "Before going through the portal, pick up a Portal Gun," Yondaime said as he picked up a large bulky, futuristic gun. "This gun is used to shoot out portals that you can cross into. Portals, in this case, are not used to switch between dimensions. Instead, they are used to move from one place to another on the same plane. Think of it as a shortcut between point A and point B. For example…" He shot a blue portal into the floor and then shot an orange one into the nearby wall. Stepping into the one on the floor, he came through the one on the wall. The class could probably see Yondaime step through the one on the wall as he disappeared into the one on the floor. It was kinda trippy.

"You'll need the portals in order to get through to the goal," he smiled and put down the gun. "You'll each start the maze in a different spot; you can work together if you find each other. There are some things to look out for in the maze; there is a furnace, air duct fans and security robots so always look before you leap. Also, you'll probably hear a computer voice talking to you as you go through the maze. Take anything she says with a grain of salt. Now go to it." He said motioning them into the maze.

As each student passed through the portal, he or she appeared in a different location around the facility, with a suddenly-closing orange portal behind them. The rooms were the same sterile white, with a few small window-like openings in the plain walls.

"Welcome to the Aperture Science Enrichment Center," A computerized female voice said, coming from no discernable source. "Your participation is…appreciated. Please take note that the fully charged portal gun in your possession is highly advanced technology, and is worth more than the sum total of-" her voice changed slightly, "-insert subject hometown here."

The voice reverted to its normal flat tones. "Use portals to complete the experiment. When you win, there will be cake."

(OCD is up, have at it! Co-written with

hanged_magician)

(YouTube is also excellent for references)

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Caaaake.

Deidara

Michael Guerin

Temari

Ami Mizuno

Sam Witwicky

Liir Thropp

Ella of Frell

Wes Collins

Do not look directly into the portal gun barrel, as this may lead to subject harm such as blindness or death.

Michael was quick to get his hands on the portal gun. This looked interesting.

Sam did not look directly into the portal gun barrel.

Really, he didn't. He just thought about it.

Liir took his portal gun with a bit of trepidation. And a bit of glee.

Deidara eyed the gun with some trepidation, but picked one up anyway.

He could always blast his way out the fun way, afterall.

Enter the maze and start blasting. See if you find each other or the end.

He stepped into the maze, gun ready, and fired at the nearest wall.

A blue portal suddenly appeared on the white wall, exactly where Michael had fired. If he looked closely at the Handheld Portal Device, Michael might see the toggle switch for the orange portal.

He had taken a proper look at it, and now he flipped the switch and tried to fire through the blue portal.

Liir stepped into the maze, looking around immediately to make sure there wasn't something moving or trying to get him right away.

As Liir stood there looking around, the computer spoke again.

"We hope your brief detention in a relaxation vault has been a pleasant one. Your specimen has been processed and we are now ready to begin the test proper. Before we start, however, keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of our enrichment center activities, serious injuries may occur. For your own safety and the safety of others, please refrain from touching-" The voice broke off in static for a moment. "Por favor bord˜n de fellar. Muchos gracias de fellar gracias."

"...please refrain from touching what?"

But he kept listening as he walked.

Eventually, Liir would discover he was walking into a dead end. There were little window-like cutouts in the walls to either side of him, however; openings large enough to, for example, shoot through.

Not that the computer would be helpful and offering such advice, of course. "The Enrichment Center regrets to inform you that this test is impossible. Make no attempt to solve it."

He quirked his lips and pointed his 'portal' gun through one of the windows and squeezed the stranged sort of trigger thing inside.

A blue portal appeared on the wall of the other hallway. Now all Liir needed was a portal to walk through in order to get there. The blue and orange toggle switch blinked at him invitingly.

"Frankly, this chamber was a mistake," GLaDOS continued. "If we were you, we would quit now."

He poked at it, startled when it didn't shoot something else, and then tried the trigger. He just happened to be pointing it at the wall next to him.

An orange portal sprang into being on the wall. If Liir stood in front of it and looked through to the blue portal, he could see himself.

Trippy.

He looked through the portal nearest him... and nearly tripped through to the other side. There was a moment where he reached his hand through carefully. Then the broom.

THEN he stepped through very carefully.

And was on the other side, looking through at the hall he'd just come through.

"Fantastic. You remained resolute and resourceful in an atmosphere of extreme pessimism," the computer said, though her mechanical voice was not very enthusiastic.

"Are you out of your mind?"

But he ignored it and moved forward where he was.

GLaDOS would be happy to tell him she had no mind, because of the restraints the programmers had put on her after she flooded the Enrichment Center with deadly neurotoxin that one time. But that would be unprofessional.

"Please note that we have added a consequence for failure," she said as Liir approached a sheer dropoff. "Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an 'unsatisfactory' mark on your official testing record, followed by death. Good luck!" The floor began again a good 10 meters away. The gap was filled with a noxious, greenish looking liquid (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v192/kiara_jinzan/other/Portal_Shots_8.jpg) that fizzed with streaks of red.

"...I think not."

The broom was pulled from it's usual holster, though with extra care considering the portal gun, and he slipped onto it before pushing off from the ground and heading for the other side.

~~No Clipping Mode FTW~~

"What are you doing? This is not part of the test," GLaDOS complained, a security camera on the wall tracking Liir's flight. "Please do not use non-testing apparatus while testing. If you continue, we will be forced to take disciplinary measures."

Or take away his cake.

Even if the cake was a lie.

He'd make his own cake. Nyaaa.

He landed on the other side and slipped the broom back from where it came.

"It's just a cleaning utensil," he said innocently.

Wes entered the maze and spun around with his eyes closed for a few moments before stopping randomly and firing in that direction.

Who does not have any cake. Woe.

You guys were a lot of fun to play with! This is going to be my last class and you all made it a blast! I'll miss you all.

OMG. OMG. *just saw DIES LAUGHING* Aperture Science... totally made my day.

*sads at last class* Thank you! It was a lot of fun even if I didn't get to do all the stuff.

Edited 2008-08-20 00:22 (UTC)

You are now in possession of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device. With it, you can create your own portals. These intra dimensional gates have proven to be completely safe. The device, however, has not. Do not touch the operational end of the Device. Do not look directly at the operational end of the device. Do not submerge the device in liquid, even partially. Most importantly, under no circumstances should you- *static*

Sorry I missed the last class. Router or modem somehow died.

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How Not To Get Killed - Tuesday - 3rd Period

Sign In

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Get a Portal Gun

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Scenario

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Talk to Yondaime

OOC

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