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fandomhigh2008-08-05 04:31 am
canadianpopstar.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2008-08-05 04:31 am
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Enjoying Those Teenage Years [period 5, Tuesday]
Today, when the students filed into the Danger Shop, they'd find that it was set up, weirdly enough, like a playground and a park, with a trampoline, Frisbees, and picnic tables with crayons and other art supplies on them.
And Robin, even more weirdly, was dressed far less professionally and more relaxed than usual, in a comfortable-looking (and very stylish AND cute) short tunic dress, with her hair wavy and loose. And off to the side, there was a little table set up with an array of sandwiches and sandwich-makings, and all kinds of chips, sodas, crackers, cookies, and sweets,all of which were totally moddable.
"Hey, kids, what's up?" Robin said, very mellow. "Today, we're covering good old marijuana. Cannabis, pot, reefer, weed, Mary Jane -- call it what you want. Except please don't call it Mary Jane. That went out about the time I stopped smoking, which was years ago.
"Now," she started, passing out a handout, "I want to note that I was never a regular smoker. I dated a bunch of potheads in college, and I experimented with it, but it wasn't a super-regular habit, before you guys start thinking you're learning from some giant ex-stoner. I know what I'm talking about, but I didn't spend all four college years in a cloud of smoke, either.
"Also, that handout's not bad. It's not as full of the anti-pot rhetoric as the PSAs you'll see on TV a lot, or in magazines. But, the thing is, those guys don't account for the fact that pot's readily available, and being told you shouldn't be doing it only means that you probably will want to do it more. So let's all learn how to do it properly, okay?
"First of all, guys, you're going to want a wee nifty container for all your paraphernalia and...stuff. In college, I was all about the Altoid containers, because the metal won't hold the smell and it looks totally innocuous. As far as containers for your product itself, you want to use the little baggies, not the big ones, because you can just tilt them into whatever you're going to use to smoke, and the bigger bags are clumsier.
"I highly recommend keeping a lighter with your stuff at all times, because trying to light these things with matches is a pain in the ass and a half. Also, rolling papers, and bowl? All together. Less chance Mommy's going to find it. Also, guys, if you don't have anything to smoke it with, make a penhitter. Totally easy: get a papermate pen. First, unscrew the metal bottom part. Remove ink cartridge, and light that end of the plastic on fire to make it softer. Push the smaller end of the metal part into the melted pen and make sure that its firmly in and won't fall out. Now stuff some product in the metal part, and you're good to go! You can also make a bong out of an apple, but that absorbs too much smoke to bother with." Robin shook her head, sighing the sigh of someone who'd tried that years ago and failed.
"Now, prices: for the love of cute little puppies, do not get ripped off. If you're a new to this, get an experienced friend to help you with buying. Also, try to find a good dealer and become his friend. Or, you know, flirt and be as cute as possible. They'll be more likely to hook you up. If you're meeting a dealer you don't know, then bring a big friend with you. Can't hurt. Also, always try to buy eighths (one eighth of an ounce). You get more bang for your buck that way.
"Okay, so now you have your product, and your own nifty little kit. Get a good buddy or two -- it's kind of lame to do it alone but you know, to each his or her own -- and find a good place. Try to choose a place where you have an extremely small chance of getting caught, which should go without saying but if no one was this stupid I'd be out of a job, and set up everything.
"Try not to take a hit that's too big, cause you'll end up either coughing like a bitch and blowing it all over the place and wasting it, or you'll swallow it, and cough insanely and just kind of be sick all over the place most of the night. Also, it's best to try to light up as little as possible. And if the bowl's roasting, don't hoard it! Pass it on to your next friend. Keep the smoke in your lungs as much as possible, and shotgun (blow the smoke into the person's face while they suck in) to the person that's in front of you in order to conserve. I wouldn't recommend this in mixed company, but with friends, you should be good.
"Now," and here Robin started to look a little shifty, "if a cop or any authority fgure ever finds you, I don't know what to tell you but to run like hell and deny. Remember, I haven't smoked in a long time, but true story -- I mentioned that I smoked in colleg to Be -- Constable Fraser and I got a very, very stern look and was told that if I did it nowadays, he'd be forced to take action. And I'm the guy's girlfriend. So, guys, don't get caught. Try to keep a lookout, and always be on your guard. You can never be too paranoid. If you're stuck holding the product, run, and hide it somewhere nearby if you can. Toss it if at all possible, really. Also, try to have someone with a cigar or cigarette so it covers the smell, and you can also try to say that you were smoking those, which will get you in virtually no trouble.
"And guys, don't be idiots. Do not smoke and drive. You're trapping it in the car with you, not to mention impairing your ability to drive," she added quickly.
"Some final tips -- try to sleep over at a friend's house, so as to avoid good ol' Mom and Dad. I mean, not so much an issue here, but remember. Stock up on body spray, and eyedrops sometimes help. Try not to keep your bowl on you, because that's what'll smell the most.
"I do not recommend this, but if you have to transport some pot with you on a trip, cut a piece of soap in half, cut the inside out, and fill the bar with the weed (in a bag of course). Close it back up, and rub the soap so the line disappears. Place it back in the container, put it with your shampoo and other stuff and you're good. I've never tried this, but it supposedly works. I don't think it's a good idea, though, and guys, if I don't think it's a good idea, that says something.
"Also, you don't have to smoke it. You can bake it into brownies or whatever, too, but I mostly just smoked it so I can't swear to much else," she admitted.
"Some ways to keep this a habit, not a stupid-ass way to spend your younger years: first off, take the stems and seeds out of your pot, because they contain no THC. Unless you're in it just to be smoking, which is stupid. Don't smoke to feel better if you're depressed. That's how we get those fun psychological addictions. And always remember, the PSAs aren't all wrong. Your friends may stop hanging out with you if you abuse it to the point where you've changed, driving under the influence applies to pot just as much as alcohol so you'll need a DD, you do lose braincells and some of you guys can't afford that, and you probably will gain weight. Where do you think the freshman fifteen comes from?
"And finally, remember: no one randomly quizzing you, like your parents, can tell for absolute certainty that you're high unless you actually tell them. Just seriously, avoid people if you're really high. It won't end well for anyone if you don't."
She sighed, making herself comfortable perched on the edge of one of the picnic tables. "So, um, if you guys have any more questions, feel free to ask me. Our activity today is kind of fun. First of all, you guys get snacks." She pointed at the table. "Because I was all about the Oreos and Pringles when I got high back in the day. I got the worst cravings when the munchies hit me. Oooh, and Timbits. Which are a Canadian thing, not an anatomical thing. So, yes, food. And then, you get to play with this list. Basically, just follow the list, and interact with each other doing crap that's on that list. Mostly because people who are high and are really aware of it are hilarious. And then remember how annoying you were while doing this, for the future, and try not to act like this when actually high."
And Robin, even more weirdly, was dressed far less professionally and more relaxed than usual, in a comfortable-looking (and very stylish AND cute) short tunic dress, with her hair wavy and loose. And off to the side, there was a little table set up with an array of sandwiches and sandwich-makings, and all kinds of chips, sodas, crackers, cookies, and sweets,
"Hey, kids, what's up?" Robin said, very mellow. "Today, we're covering good old marijuana. Cannabis, pot, reefer, weed, Mary Jane -- call it what you want. Except please don't call it Mary Jane. That went out about the time I stopped smoking, which was years ago.
"Now," she started, passing out a handout, "I want to note that I was never a regular smoker. I dated a bunch of potheads in college, and I experimented with it, but it wasn't a super-regular habit, before you guys start thinking you're learning from some giant ex-stoner. I know what I'm talking about, but I didn't spend all four college years in a cloud of smoke, either.
"Also, that handout's not bad. It's not as full of the anti-pot rhetoric as the PSAs you'll see on TV a lot, or in magazines. But, the thing is, those guys don't account for the fact that pot's readily available, and being told you shouldn't be doing it only means that you probably will want to do it more. So let's all learn how to do it properly, okay?
"First of all, guys, you're going to want a wee nifty container for all your paraphernalia and...stuff. In college, I was all about the Altoid containers, because the metal won't hold the smell and it looks totally innocuous. As far as containers for your product itself, you want to use the little baggies, not the big ones, because you can just tilt them into whatever you're going to use to smoke, and the bigger bags are clumsier.
"I highly recommend keeping a lighter with your stuff at all times, because trying to light these things with matches is a pain in the ass and a half. Also, rolling papers, and bowl? All together. Less chance Mommy's going to find it. Also, guys, if you don't have anything to smoke it with, make a penhitter. Totally easy: get a papermate pen. First, unscrew the metal bottom part. Remove ink cartridge, and light that end of the plastic on fire to make it softer. Push the smaller end of the metal part into the melted pen and make sure that its firmly in and won't fall out. Now stuff some product in the metal part, and you're good to go! You can also make a bong out of an apple, but that absorbs too much smoke to bother with." Robin shook her head, sighing the sigh of someone who'd tried that years ago and failed.
"Now, prices: for the love of cute little puppies, do not get ripped off. If you're a new to this, get an experienced friend to help you with buying. Also, try to find a good dealer and become his friend. Or, you know, flirt and be as cute as possible. They'll be more likely to hook you up. If you're meeting a dealer you don't know, then bring a big friend with you. Can't hurt. Also, always try to buy eighths (one eighth of an ounce). You get more bang for your buck that way.
"Okay, so now you have your product, and your own nifty little kit. Get a good buddy or two -- it's kind of lame to do it alone but you know, to each his or her own -- and find a good place. Try to choose a place where you have an extremely small chance of getting caught, which should go without saying but if no one was this stupid I'd be out of a job, and set up everything.
"Try not to take a hit that's too big, cause you'll end up either coughing like a bitch and blowing it all over the place and wasting it, or you'll swallow it, and cough insanely and just kind of be sick all over the place most of the night. Also, it's best to try to light up as little as possible. And if the bowl's roasting, don't hoard it! Pass it on to your next friend. Keep the smoke in your lungs as much as possible, and shotgun (blow the smoke into the person's face while they suck in) to the person that's in front of you in order to conserve. I wouldn't recommend this in mixed company, but with friends, you should be good.
"Now," and here Robin started to look a little shifty, "if a cop or any authority fgure ever finds you, I don't know what to tell you but to run like hell and deny. Remember, I haven't smoked in a long time, but true story -- I mentioned that I smoked in colleg to Be -- Constable Fraser and I got a very, very stern look and was told that if I did it nowadays, he'd be forced to take action. And I'm the guy's girlfriend. So, guys, don't get caught. Try to keep a lookout, and always be on your guard. You can never be too paranoid. If you're stuck holding the product, run, and hide it somewhere nearby if you can. Toss it if at all possible, really. Also, try to have someone with a cigar or cigarette so it covers the smell, and you can also try to say that you were smoking those, which will get you in virtually no trouble.
"And guys, don't be idiots. Do not smoke and drive. You're trapping it in the car with you, not to mention impairing your ability to drive," she added quickly.
"Some final tips -- try to sleep over at a friend's house, so as to avoid good ol' Mom and Dad. I mean, not so much an issue here, but remember. Stock up on body spray, and eyedrops sometimes help. Try not to keep your bowl on you, because that's what'll smell the most.
"I do not recommend this, but if you have to transport some pot with you on a trip, cut a piece of soap in half, cut the inside out, and fill the bar with the weed (in a bag of course). Close it back up, and rub the soap so the line disappears. Place it back in the container, put it with your shampoo and other stuff and you're good. I've never tried this, but it supposedly works. I don't think it's a good idea, though, and guys, if I don't think it's a good idea, that says something.
"Also, you don't have to smoke it. You can bake it into brownies or whatever, too, but I mostly just smoked it so I can't swear to much else," she admitted.
"Some ways to keep this a habit, not a stupid-ass way to spend your younger years: first off, take the stems and seeds out of your pot, because they contain no THC. Unless you're in it just to be smoking, which is stupid. Don't smoke to feel better if you're depressed. That's how we get those fun psychological addictions. And always remember, the PSAs aren't all wrong. Your friends may stop hanging out with you if you abuse it to the point where you've changed, driving under the influence applies to pot just as much as alcohol so you'll need a DD, you do lose braincells and some of you guys can't afford that, and you probably will gain weight. Where do you think the freshman fifteen comes from?
"And finally, remember: no one randomly quizzing you, like your parents, can tell for absolute certainty that you're high unless you actually tell them. Just seriously, avoid people if you're really high. It won't end well for anyone if you don't."
She sighed, making herself comfortable perched on the edge of one of the picnic tables. "So, um, if you guys have any more questions, feel free to ask me. Our activity today is kind of fun. First of all, you guys get snacks." She pointed at the table. "Because I was all about the Oreos and Pringles when I got high back in the day. I got the worst cravings when the munchies hit me. Oooh, and Timbits. Which are a Canadian thing, not an anatomical thing. So, yes, food. And then, you get to play with this list. Basically, just follow the list, and interact with each other doing crap that's on that list. Mostly because people who are high and are really aware of it are hilarious. And then remember how annoying you were while doing this, for the future, and try not to act like this when actually high."
Re: Listen to the lecture [08/05]
Class, last summer? They said the weapon had the key to ultimate enlightenment and I got really, really Zen. ... You don't think ... ?
Re: Listen to the lecture [08/05]
Re: Listen to the lecture [08/05]