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fandomhigh2008-07-30 01:41 am
brandyforapples.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2008-07-30 01:41 am
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Basic Cryptozoology - Wednesday - First Period - 7/30
Lucky for her class, Abigail Irene Garrett was in fact in a lovely mood for the day. She had a date set for Friday, there was a play on the island which sounded very interesting, and her patchwork terrier Mike was up on her desk, insisting on getting a scritch from under her hand.
"Today, as I told you last week, I'll be asking each of you to present a few minutes on the subject of a creature, perhaps a cryptid, from your own world. I'll start things off for all of us...
[ocd up!]
"Today, as I told you last week, I'll be asking each of you to present a few minutes on the subject of a creature, perhaps a cryptid, from your own world. I'll start things off for all of us...
[ocd up!]
Re: A Creature From Your World
It wasn't like he was lacking for creatures to choose from, here.
"The Malboro," he said, standing up. He wasn't going to be the center of attention sitting down, dammit. "Could be a plant with teeth. Or maybe it's an animal that looks like an artichoke with tentacles. Whatever the hell it is, it's freakin' huge, freakin' smelly, and freakin' nasty. The best thing to do if you see one of these things? Is just don't be anywhere near where you might see one of these things. You probably don't have to worry. Where I'm from, they're really only found in remote places. An underground cave where Banora used to be, and in colder mountain areas. And if you're stupid enough to go wanderin' around the Northern Cave, you probably deserve to be attacked by these things anyhow, yo.
"You'll know a Malboro when you see it, trust me. They're usually green, taller than the average human by at least a half-meter, and mostly round with tentacles at the bottom to move around with, and a giant mouth cuttin' the main body in two with a row of razor-sharp teeth. You don't ever wanna be on that end of the Malboro. The safest place to be if you are stuck in a fight with one is at the rear, hackin' the hell out of it with a sword, if you got one handy. They recoil a bit when you hit 'em from behind. If you're fast enough, you might be able to kill it before it can even manage to turn around.
"If it does turn around? Been nice knowin' you. It's armed with a bunch of freakin' nasty biological attacks aimed at tearin' you down bit by bit, so you die nice and slow before it eats you. What you gotta worry about the worst is its Bad Breath attack."
Reno rolled his eyes and smirked faintly.
"Okay. Sounds like a joke. Give it a breath mint, whatever. That ain't how it works. If you get hit with bad breath, any of a bunch of things can rip you apart. You could be poisoned, put to sleep, stripped of any ability to cast magic against it, or even shrank to a couple of inches tall or turned into a frog."
Yes. Gaia was a weird place.
"If you do happen to be wanderin' around where there are Malboros crawlin' around, a good plan is to bring along accessories to help you fend off the nasty effects of its bad breath. A ribbon'll do just that, yo. And I mean, not your run of the mill freakin' pink ribbon that you can pick up at any slum market. I mean a ribbon. The kind you need ain't easy to come by. You might never see one of 'em your entire life. But they'll protect you from any status issue that might hit you on my world, from that stupid toad thing to petrify to poison, yo. From there, it's probably just a matter of bringin' along breath mints. And a sword."
Re: A Creature From Your World
"Have you encountered them frequently then?"
Re: A Creature From Your World
Because Reno liked not being dead.
Re: A Creature From Your World
"Is the strategy you shared the one you used in the situation?"
Re: A Creature From Your World
"I don't work with swords," he replied. "I prefer to keep off to a distance if I can, and the company I work for rarely sends me off on solo missions." Back in the good old days. "Lemmie tell you, standin' back and throwin' fire and lightning at one of those buggers is a real bitc- ... Pain, yo." Heh. Oops. "In the time it takes to cast, they're already on top of you. I don't got the proper armor to deal with one of 'em anyhow. Best I leave the Malboros to people better suited for the job. If I was stuck face-to-face with one, I'd be beatin' on the back of its head with a metal stick for the rest of my life."
Re: A Creature From Your World