fandomhigh | Library; Wednesday [ 11/28 ]

Just one book. Adah settled in behind the desk with it opened to the first page. She knew it wouldn't make a difference to change the book. It would be the same problem. They took shake in her head, but she couldn't get meaning to be gleaned from it. She was going to sit there until they did.

Unseen fingerprints on the pages, as Adah repeatedly, repeatedly dragged her finger across the shapes, the curves, the angles of the letters, hoping that would help or, if not, that they would smear the ink and then she wouldn't have to worry about them anymore because they'd be just black mars on yellowing pages and that...that she could understand.

To know that a book was a book and words were words, but not that they were called such. To know they had names but their names were unnameable. A rose by any other name....might as well be a book, because it was all the same confusing, impenetrable things to Adah. She let out a soft sigh, curled over the book, still determined but her determination lessening.

The library is closed for lunch to everyone except the librarian and other aides. Because Adah actually does care this week. She needs a damn nap after all that frustrating work with no progress.

Rubbing her eye a little, Adah steeled herself to try again. It didn't last long before she started feeling it was inevitable and slouched slightly forward, frowning, and there she stayed.

While the rules of linguistic comprehension seemed to have failed Adah, she knew for a fact that she could always depend on other rules to continue to exist. Like gravity, as she'd discovered yesterday when she fell. She decided to tempt them now by building up a precariously balanced, perfectly planned tower of books for the person who worked tomorrow. The slightest bit of unbalance would ruin it all. After a day of failure, Adah wasn't about to let that happen.

Job interview today! Will be leaving for that shortly, but then around all day!

Although nervous, River had decided to see if Adah would be in the library today. She was determined not to move too fast again, and she had brought an apple as usual, hoping it would be less tiring than the drawings. Of course, she had taken a drawing pad with her too, with a few carefully chosen pictures, but that would have to wait.

Making an effort to walk slowly, she approached the desk.

*fingers crossed for job interview*

After a few weeks off the routine, Lee found himself slowly pushing open the door to the library and stepping inside. He wasn't really entirely certain what to expect but he couldn't stay away forever.

So, he smiled a little and padded slowly towards the desk.

Good luck! I just had one today!

The identification of River and her slow approach came in the image of a sudden gush of water cutting through the shapes of the nonsensical words in her brain, cutting through them a path as they swept some of them away, and Adah sighed, if only for the shift in perception. It wasn't as if she'd miss the words; she didn't know what they were anyway, and they were frustrating, but she wished they wouldn't. She blinked at the page she'd been focusing on and tiredly lifted her eyes. If this was how she felt only after a small amount of time, she hated to see how she'd feel later today.

She felt how tired everything made Adah, of course. River met Adah's eyes, and slowly took a seat on the desk, stretching out her legs. If she could do that - wash away the excess, the distractions - she would be content. Perhaps the sugar the apple contained would be useful. She held up the fruit, her other hand holding the knive.

If Adah had noticed the boy approach (she had), she showed no indication of it, her concentration very firmly on the tower of books, now just slightly taller than she so that she had to reach a little. She bit the corner of her mouth in concentration as her single hand moved side it on the other one, replacing its spot on top and, carefully, drew her hand away with bated breath and watchful eyes to see if it remained steady.

It did. She let out a soft breath and a small smile.

"Nice job," Lee remarked quietly, stopping just short of leaning on the counter so as not to disturb the pile. "That's quite a tower of books there."

[Forgive my slow tags omg. Work is equivalent to a punch in the face today.]

Adah's gaze shifted, slowly, dully, still blinking away words, from River to the apple to the knife, lingering on the knife with a tilted head as she worked through relating its shape to its use. Serrated edge, a balance to be worked from one end, like a lever, to pierce through a skin, be it the flesh of an apple (easier) or a flesh of a human (would take work). She dragged her eyes toward River, expectantly, because she knew her motor functions still wouldn't be good enough to handle a knife well. Then again, they never were.

He was saying something, words she couldn't understand in a language she knew she probably should, or, at one point, had, reminding her of how she'd figured how to walk again, to perceive and think (therefor, she was!), but not to read and not only not to read, but not to comprehend languages as a whole unless it came in colors or movement or shapes. The reminder left her frowning for a moment, eyes still locked on her town, but only a moment. The moment passed and she picked up another book to carefully add to the tower. Mostly ignoring the boy for now because she hadn't decided yet if she had any energy left in her to hopelessly try to interpret more things.

Lee frowned briefly and looked down at his feet. It was already hard but she was awake and that was so much better than just a week or so ago.

"Going to make it even taller?" Small talk seemed to be the best bet.

River could handle a knife, however. Slowly she began to peel the apple, creating the usual long spiralling strip of peel. She cut the strip in two, then sliced the apple in halves, placing two half things in front of Adah.

Then quietly she pulled a few sheets of paper out of her bag and placed them upside down on the desk. They were drawings, but they were not meant for now, but for when Adah had the time an energy for them, if she wanted. The first one was similar to the one she had drawn this weekend: A long meandering river. The second bore a strong resemblance to the one she had drawn a while ago, of Adah in a yellow dress, this time without words. The third was another one of an apple cut in half - perhaps she was repeating herself? - and the fourth one of a vole skeleton with a collection of acorns. The fifth showed a black stuffed thing with blue eyes: The black plague. River had been reluctant to include that one, considering recent events. She had also had her doubts about the sixth one: It showed a wiggling eel. It was only fair enough, River thought, although she wasn't sure it was a good thing that the wiggling eel had a shape similar to the meandering river.

More words, unfamiliar, but as Adah reached for another book and carefully considered it's weight and density, she realize that, while she didn't know the words, there was something about the way they sounded that was familiar and she blinked, head tilting again slightly, thoughtfully. She realized that, while the tower was perfect, something else was off about this. More body memories, movements, slowly starting to burrow out of their hibernation to make themselves known. Like animals and phases of the moon, times of the day, things she'd otherwise be doing. She slid another book into place, and then left her hand hovering by it, fingers twitching back slightly as she looked at the stack. Almost as if anticipating the eventual fall, but also trying to figure out the tug at her brain that suggested she usually did other things with her hands at this cycle of the day.

His eyes caught her fingers, caught the movement and he couldn't help the small smile that appeared on his face. He raised his own hand, wiggled his fingers slowly at her while still keeping his distance.

"It's a nice tower," he said, turning his hand over to show his palm. He'd almost wished he'd written something on them. "Books made good foundation."

Adah's attention completely disregarded River's quiet movements and the drawings; she had been watching, carefully, because learning came with watching, on the movement of River's hands as she held the knife, peeled the apple, of the growing spiral of inconsistent red flesh that sprung from the workings of the blade. Her wide eyes fixated on it; now there was an image that seemed to stick. More so than just the apple. An apple did nothing for her, but the curl of the peel, the ability to follow it as it twisted, climbing up, up, until it disappeared in down another path, a long throat withing a long neck. The thought made her lift her own chin slightly, elongating her own neck as her eyes moved. River moved. To her bag, and as she extracted things from it, Adah followed an assumed path of the spiraled skin down her throat and her breath, quietly, caught a bit. The excitement came from more than just finally getting an image that stuck, that seemed to finally reveal some of what the breakdown had erased.

Hand remained, drifting, suspended between thoughts, Adah's eyes slowly drifted from the tower toward him. She blinked, leveling them for a moment at him before they notably went to his hand, the moving fingers, distracting her, that damn movement, but, for some reason, the distraction wasn't annoying her, possibly because, be it remembering or simple realization, she knew he was doing it intentionally to draw her attention to them and she grinned, slightly, looking at him with accusing eyes and a light tingling of familiarity.

River felt Adah's eyes, saw what she saw, and smiled. She had perhaps put too much effort into more permanent images, when in fact the image of the present was the most powerful tool. Shifting slowly, she pushed herself down on her back on the desk and raised a hand holding her half of the apple peel. She opened her mouth, stretched out her tongue a little, and let the peel spiral down her throat.

Edited 2007-11-28 19:17 (UTC)

His smiled widened a bit when he saw her noticing his hands and he moved his fingers slightly faster before opening and closing his hand a few times and resuming the wiggling.

"I usually tap them," he said quietly. "Tap them against things."

And he mimed tapping his fingers before just using his other arm as a solid object and tapping his fingers against his wrist.

Adah looked down at the other girl on the desk with everything quirked: eyebrow, head, the corner of her mouth on the left side. Confirmation of an image, a thought, an association in flesh and blood and intents that couldn't be further from their last encounter. There was confidence in this, where there had been none the other day. Adah watched the apple peel disappear with another little spike cutting deep inside of her and then, questions of potential memories or overactive imagination pulling her, she looked toward River's eyes. She might not be able to read words (or minds, she felt the need to remind herself for some reason), but she could read expressions.

Her eyes met Adah's and there was laughter in them. Not overactive imagination, certainly not, but even if it was that wasn't the kind of fantasies River would object to. She reached for her half of the apple and for the knife, and cut a thin slice. Holding it up over her open mouth like before, River stuck her tongue out and let it explore the shape before devouring it.

After the long day of mostly circles, it was encouraging to have made another development. The excitement drove Adah to not focus on the increased speed of the fingers, and, instead, to focus on him. He was talking again, and she knew she should be happy for her progress so far, but she just couldn't help trying, really straining to understand what he said, but it was all like mushy, pointless sounds to her still, and she shook her head.

Not entirely a loss. Paying attention to what he said and how he moved his mouth (maybe she could read lips if though not words, but no luck) had caused her to realize that she really recognized that jawline, another piece. So many pieces being discovered, she just hoped she could find out where to put them.

Then he started tapping her wrist, and she watched that carefully, too. The significance had not been drawn up yet, but she found a rhythm, blinked with it, found its pace. Tap, tap, tapping, rapping at my chamber door...

Something about, that, too, she should know, but one thing at a time...

Deciding to be bolder than he planned, Lee stepped closer to the desk and put one of his hands, palm down, flat on top of it.

He kept it still for a few moments, letting her get used to it, before he started tapping against the desk. This was better than his wrist because there were noises now, a pattern that he could use that wouldn't get disrupted by his other arm moving.

"I can be restless," he said quietly, looking at her. "And I do this as a habit or to get someone's attention. That last one was mostly for you, though."

Edited 2007-11-28 19:49 (UTC)

Couldn't read words, but she could read that, and the pieces of familiarity started to find where they fit, in terms that weren't at all appropriate for their placement, River sprawled with her back on the desk like that, thoughts of exactly how familiar Adah was with River.

Lots off pieces. Too many. Her brain lurched at the opportunity for progress, especially toward something good, filled in the holes too fast, and Adah had to draw back, close her eyes to hope that the swell passed. She imagined that the images revealed by these pieces put into place really wasn't helping, either. Warning lights flashing in her head. Too much again; everything was too much! It made her want to throw a book across the room in frustration.

Too much and too fast again. River's smile faded and she curled up on her side, quietly watching Adah, almost holding her breath, and waiting for the moment of overload to pass. She hoped she wouldn't have to leave this time, because even if no progress was made, being with Adah felt good.

Edited 2007-11-28 20:10 (UTC)

The shift, the stopping of the tapping for the hand to move, set Adah back a little, and she blinked, gave her head a sharp shake to allow herself to focus. But it seemed to have created a bit more of setback than just that, The tapping started again, and Adah's brain seemed to cling to it. Tapping she understood, rhythms, that it quickly, almost in an urge to compensate more for the fact that she hadn't done more earlier. It knew this. It was easy, and she stared, blinking occasionally (also a rhythm, every three seconds), and the concepts of numbers started filing in, measuring, dividing, timing, creating elaborate lists of figures. She didn't even notice that he had tried talking to her again. The numbers, seizing the opening from the shift in her gaze, had taken completely over.

"Sorry," he said quietly, stilling his fingers before slowly pulling his hand back. "Too much. I surprised you. Like someone put a crab on your stomach."

No idea where that'd come from.

He tucked one of his hands in his pocket to keep from doing that again today.

Although Adah's eyes remained closed, they lightened a little, not closed as much as she heard movement on River's behalf, tried to match what it sounded like to her mind, and let out a low breath, focusing on the rustling of clothes, the folding of limbs. Focus on one thing to force the rest out, a hectic high school kegger and those weren't warning lights, they were the pigs coming break it up. Focus on one thing, and her breath, threatening to derail, calmed. And she allowed a small smile. River was always moving...she coudl remember that, too, but, mostly, she just thought of how utterly appropriate it all was. It made things easier for her, if she didn't get too much, to have things connect like that, for a girl that never stopped moving to be named after a body of water that also never stopped.

It was...good progress. Hopefully a frame for the rest of Adah's day, but she worried, remembering the other day, that it wouldn't be enough again, and that movement was the same sort of movement from the other day. Disappointment...

Adah shouldn't be disappointed, River thought, but she had no way of expressing that without making things worse, so she lay still on the desk, not moving apart from curling her toes and letting her gaze wander along Adah's arms, up her neck and follow the curve of her chin. She didn't think Adah would mind.

The fingers stopped. The hand drew away, and the numbers rolling comfortingly in Adah's head came to a screeching stop, leaving her eyes widening before she blinked in confusion at the sudden empty space. Numbers in her head collapsing, like plague victims, like herself, like fallen soldiers and coconuts during a storm. She frowned, deeply, and looked with confused eyes toward him, almost demanding an explanation from him. Before she realized that even if he had one, she wouldn't understand it, so, the frown shifted, and she looked away again.

"Oh, geez, that was wrong too," he said, wincing and pressing the heel of his hand to his head.

"I'm sorry," he said, having to say it even if she didn't understand. With careful precision, he pulled his hand out of his pocket, tapped just one finger on the counter before he started swirling it around in random shapes and patterns.

Her eyes closing tightly, Adah lifted her hand to rub the lids with her thumb and forefinger. She was feeling annoyed, upset, frustrated. It had been a long, straining day. Any moment where she ended up making success, she was very shortly thereafter taken right back down. She grunted, slightly, and then, as her hand dropped, she let her shoulders fall, too, staring blankly down at the desk as if she didn't have the energy to do much else. Communication was impossible, and her head was getting the dull buzz of pain inside it.

"Yeah, my fault," he said and tucked his hand back away. "I'll...get better. Sorry about that. I'm still learning."

Even if words weren't useful right now, they still came.

"I should go so I don't bother you," he said, frowning. "I'll come back soon, I promise."

With that, he started walking backwards towards the door even managing a small smile as he walked.

Library; Wednesday [ 11/28 ]

First Period -- 11/28

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