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fandomhigh2007-09-13 09:53 am
certaintrouble.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2007-09-13 09:53 am
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US History- Thursday, September 13
Lesson 2: Columbus + Pilgrims
When the students arrived, Mr. Noblet was nowhere to be found. The bell rang, and there was still no teacher.
There was, however, the sound of footsteps. Someone sprinting. The sound grew louder, and Mr. Noblet, red-faced and panting from exhaustion, entered the room. He closed the door behind him and leaned back on it. He gave the class a dismissive wave, and managed to say, “Be right…with you…”
He took a minute for his heart rate to get out of the danger zone, then grabbed his clipboard out of his suitcase. “I believe you had some homework assigned on the syllabus. Pull it out; let’s have a look.”
As he took attendance, Mr. Noblet checked everyone’s homework. Afterwards, he put his clipboard down and moved to the chalkboard, where he wrote
Columbus
Chuck Noblet turned to the class. “I want you to forget all that junk people keep trying to feed you about Norsemen or that red viking getting here first. Ignore them. Those people are communists.
Columbus sailed to America with his fleet of ships: the Nina, the Pinta, and the USS Titanic. One of these ships did not make it to America, as it crashed on an iceberg. I am referring, of course, to the Pinta.
It was Columbus’ dream to discover the new world, where he would be able to open an Italian restaurant, thus bringing civilization to foreign lands. Ironically, his success was a problem at the beginning. Upon Columbus’ landing, the Indians declared a national holiday, “Columbus Day”. Columbus was unable to reach a bank, and could thus not get the money to put down a deposit on the land he wanted. This, compounded with a series of other misfortunes, prevented Columbus from ever establishing his restaurant. The pain of a dream unfulfilled would haunt him ‘til his dying day.”
The next successful colony was established by the Pilgrims. To quote a foremost expert in American History: “Plymouth succeeded because its inhabitants did not come to the New World searching for glory, adventure, or hot man-on-Indian-action. Rather, the Pilgrims had come to escape religious persecution, to create a society where they could worship as they pleased and one day, God willing, do some persecuting of their own.”
Chuck looked at the class. “Any questions?”
OOC:OCD will be up in a shortly. OCD is ready and willing!
When the students arrived, Mr. Noblet was nowhere to be found. The bell rang, and there was still no teacher.
There was, however, the sound of footsteps. Someone sprinting. The sound grew louder, and Mr. Noblet, red-faced and panting from exhaustion, entered the room. He closed the door behind him and leaned back on it. He gave the class a dismissive wave, and managed to say, “Be right…with you…”
He took a minute for his heart rate to get out of the danger zone, then grabbed his clipboard out of his suitcase. “I believe you had some homework assigned on the syllabus. Pull it out; let’s have a look.”
As he took attendance, Mr. Noblet checked everyone’s homework. Afterwards, he put his clipboard down and moved to the chalkboard, where he wrote
Columbus
Chuck Noblet turned to the class. “I want you to forget all that junk people keep trying to feed you about Norsemen or that red viking getting here first. Ignore them. Those people are communists.
Columbus sailed to America with his fleet of ships: the Nina, the Pinta, and the USS Titanic. One of these ships did not make it to America, as it crashed on an iceberg. I am referring, of course, to the Pinta.
It was Columbus’ dream to discover the new world, where he would be able to open an Italian restaurant, thus bringing civilization to foreign lands. Ironically, his success was a problem at the beginning. Upon Columbus’ landing, the Indians declared a national holiday, “Columbus Day”. Columbus was unable to reach a bank, and could thus not get the money to put down a deposit on the land he wanted. This, compounded with a series of other misfortunes, prevented Columbus from ever establishing his restaurant. The pain of a dream unfulfilled would haunt him ‘til his dying day.”
The next successful colony was established by the Pilgrims. To quote a foremost expert in American History: “Plymouth succeeded because its inhabitants did not come to the New World searching for glory, adventure, or hot man-on-Indian-action. Rather, the Pilgrims had come to escape religious persecution, to create a society where they could worship as they pleased and one day, God willing, do some persecuting of their own.”
Chuck looked at the class. “Any questions?”
OOC:
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And there are doodles of man-on-Indian action. Of the not dirty kind, omg.
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Lecture
*Snicker*
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Notes
After class
OOC
America: The Book by the The Daily Show writers (deep down in my mind, this is your textbook.)
Stan Freeberg’s United States of America
It’s the weirdest thing ever. Researching information to make sure I get History wrong. I love my life.
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And even if they were the dirty kind, Chuck would probably still not mind. Not at all.
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