fandomhigh | How to be a Comic Book Superhero (Monday, outside the Kwik Stop)

Jay and Silent Bob were bickering loudly as they lounged in front of the Kwik Stop.

"Look, Lunchbox, it says right fucking here that you're the sidekick and I'm the fucking hero! I'm Morris Day, you're the fucking Time!"

Bob shook his head emphatically, taking the magazine from Jay and shoving it at the nearest student. Ignoring Jay's repetitive and profanity-laced list of why Silent Bob (or Bluntman) was, according to the article, the sidekick in this dynamic duo, he turned to his ever-present whiteboard and wrote 'QUALITIES OF A GOOD SIDEKICK'.

Following the discussion, the whiteboard was cleared to provide that week's homework assignment.

'FIND AND TRAIN A SIDEKICK. May be useful in final class in two weeks.'

[[Major thanks to

the_merriest, who reminded me that today is, in fact, Monday. While the article talks about Jay and Silent Bob (they're number, like 34 or something), the Fandom version is about Bluntman and Chronic. Yes? Yes.

ETA: I forgot the homework assignment. Yes, sidekicks will be welcome in the final workshop, coordinate with whoever you recruit whether or not they would like to take part.

OCD up, play away!]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

~~The chickpea is neither a chick nor a pea . . .~~

Read the Entertainment Weekly article on the greatest sidekicks of all time (26-50 (http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,1213384,00.html), 25-1 (http://www.ew.com/ew/article/0,,20041659,00.html)) and add to the list of qualities of a good sidekick.

Rikku raised her hand, bouncing. "Someone fun!" she said helpfully. "And superawesome badass. Except you don't want them too superawesomebadass or then you'd be the sidekick, not them, right?"

Jay looked smug. "I told you, Lunchbox."

Bob rolled his eyes but gave her a thumbs-up and added both ideas to the board.

"Well they'd have to be able to do things that the hero can't do." Robin said. "Otherwise what would be the point. For instance in my case they'd have to be able to carry the heavy stuff cause I can't." Then he tilted his head thoughtfully. "And, if the title is Bluntman and Chronic, doesn't that mean that Chronic is the sidekick? Otherwise it'd be Chronic and Bluntman wouldn't it?"

Silent Bob mentally gave the little guy an 'A'. With a beatific grin, he added 'heavy lifting' to the list.

I'd need a sidekick that could clean up later, after the fight. Take care of all the mess and reporters and such.

"I like the way this dude fucking things!" Jay crowed, pounding him on the back gleefully.

Bob, however, gave him a second glance before adding 'public relations' to the list.

"Someone who doesn't mind running out for food." Marco said, ignoring the growling in his stomach.

"They've got to be willing to drag you home from the pub and hold your head while you puke," Jenny said sagely. "Also if they'll set out the aspirin and water that's a plus."

How to be a Comic Book Superhero (Monday, outside the Kwik Stop)

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