How to Be a Comic Book Superhero, Week 2 [Monday, in front of the Kwik Stop]

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

Punctuality was not a concept found in Jay's limited mental capacity. Making an entrance, however, was definitely up there.

"Check it, mothafuckers!"

Jay exploded onto the scene, boombox unceremoniously dumped on the small table sitting beside a propped-up white board. He moonwalked back and forth in front of them for a moment before grabbing his crotch in the general direction of, well, everything vaguely female. "Fuck, I got some fine little school girl pussy for me today - and you dude. I am Jay and you lucky little bitches get to learn the fine art of fucking like -"

Silent Bob popped up behind him, peeling duct tape off the sleeve of his jacket and giving him a reproving, sad look, spreading his hands as if to ask what he thought he was doing. Sulking, Jay shoved his hands in his pockets and slouched. "Fuck, fatass, ruin all my fucking fun."

Bob tilted his head towards the students. Jay scowled. "Fine. I'm Jay and this morose motherfucker is my black manservant, Silent Bob. He's the actual teacher 'cause apparently I'm not supposed to be left alone with minors. Fucking parole."

Silent Bob rolled his eyes and started writing on the board while Jay hopped up on the table beside the boombox, swinging his legs and never shutting up. "Don't know why this fatass gets to do all the teaching." Bob wrote 'introductions' and waved at the students. Jay sneered. "Like I fucking need to know their names when those tight little bitches -"

Bob glared. Jay sighed. "Shit. Name, age, fucking bra size, don't care."

Bob drew a familiar logo that looked like a bat.

"And whatever gay-ass names you fuckers picked for yourself last week."

Introductions finished, Bob erased the board and wrote 'POWERS'. Then he wrote 'UNLAME'.

"Powers? Fuck, Lunchbox, if I had a superpower I'd have, like, the power to make hot chicks' clothes disappear like fucking that." He wiggled his fingers. Bob rolled his eyes and added 'LIKE THAT'.

[[Back from vaycay, Deadpool-mun wins all, will be around to play after about 6EST. And . . . I'm sorry about Jay. I just . . . I'm sorry.]]

Comments

Discussion

[silent-robert.livejournal.com]

Of powers. Changing one's superhero persona totally acceptable. Bob won't be doing much discussing.

Re: Discussion

[the_merriest]

"You mean, what we can do?" Rikku shrugged. "Let's see. I can blow things up, and mix 'em up for better explosives, and I'm a really good thief, and I know a couple of magic spells but not anything badass. I kinda just picked up things from everybody else as we went along, you know?"

Re: Discussion

[by137.livejournal.com]

"My work has the ability to stop villains in their tracks and suddenly make them want to be art critics," A.J. grinned. "Which means they suddenly becomes pretensious to the point where they're completely worthless and, thus! Crime averted, thanks to...the Artist!"

That was his story and he was sticking to it, man.

Re: Discussion

[tatooine-doofus.livejournal.com]

Luke carefully suppressed a snicker, but his eyes twinkled as he looked over at A.J.

Re: Discussion

[by137.livejournal.com]

"What?" A.J. tried to narrow his eyes a little at Luke but ended up laughing instead. "It's a great power."

Re: Discussion

[morpherboy.livejournal.com]

"I can turn into any animal and crack a joke in any situation."

Re: Discussion

[ashockingbitch]

"I control electricity," Jenny said, "And I haven't managed to kill myself via alcohol yet."

Re: Discussion

[notthehulk.livejournal.com]

The name totally made sense. If you knew anything about his home.

Yeah, he doubted crazy stoner guy did.

"Um... super strength and shapeshifting?"

Re: Discussion

[pyroliz.livejournal.com]

"I can create fire," Liz said

Re: Discussion

[tatooine-doofus.livejournal.com]

"I'm a Jedi like my father," Luke said, frowning down at his broken arm. "So...the Kid. I have faster reflexes, telekinetic and telepathic abilities and got beat up by a giant dinosaur. Dammit."

Re: Discussion

[the_merriest]

Rikku stared. "A dinosaur!?"

That was it. She was never leaving Fandom again.

Re: Discussion

[tatooine-doofus.livejournal.com]

"A dinosaur," Luke said, with a pout. "There were a lot of them, too. I did fine the first day, but the second one...turns out Jedi can't fly."

Re: Discussion

[the_merriest]

Rikku was also pouting. "You know, the last time I left? That's when the school blows up. Why do I miss everything cool around here?"

Re: Discussion

[tatooine-doofus.livejournal.com]

"Maybe whatever weirdness watches the island fears your powers?" Luke suggested with a cheeky smile.

Re: Discussion

[robinthefrog.livejournal.com]

"We're glad you got away." Robin nodded.

Re: Discussion

[tatooine-doofus.livejournal.com]

"Eaten by a dinosaur is a really stupid way to die," Luke agreed.

Re: Discussion

[robinthefrog.livejournal.com]

"I managed to avoid that too." Robin nodded. "Those things were mean."

Re: Discussion

[tatooine-doofus.livejournal.com]

Luke sulked some more. "But I've taken out a rancor with a rock. Stupid dinosaurs."

Re: Discussion

[untouchableskin.livejournal.com]

Rogue... was pretty much speechless.

"Um... my power is to kill with a touch," she said.

Re: Discussion

[robinthefrog.livejournal.com]

"...Eep."

Re: Discussion

[untouchableskin.livejournal.com]

Rogue looked over.

And blinked.

Willow had said something about a talking frog, right?

"Hi?"

Re: Discussion

[robinthefrog.livejournal.com]

"Hi! I'm Robin." Muppets don't have skin in the traditional sense. It's possible her power wouldn't work on him.

Re: Discussion

[robinthefrog.livejournal.com]

"Mostly I hop. I'm still perfecting them but I used this skill yesterday to outwit to Raptors. Never did get my tent back though."

Re: Discussion

[halfshell-hero.livejournal.com]

"If being a giant talking turtle doesn't count, dudes, can I call being a ninja as a superpower? Or will I have to settle for super powers of party and awesome?"

Re: Discussion

[turnthisfrown.livejournal.com]

St. John Allerdyce blinked only twice during Jay's...introduction.
He'd gone through a phase of swearing and perversion not too long ago, and lived with Gambit...and a homocidal cat-man. Thus, he was not nearly so disturbed as any normal person would.

"Uh...I've got the ability to manipulate fire to do pretty much whatever I want it to. But I have to see the fire in order to do that....and...I can't actually...create the fire." God, he hated admitting that. It pissed him off every time the phrase left his lips.