How to Be Awesome: Period 1, Week 1

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

[Workshop Roster]

When students gathered in the Danger Shop, they would notice it was set up much like the dressing room area of a large department store, except there were tables, chairs, and a podium. A drape covered an oblong object near the dressing room door. Barney stood at the podium, dressed in a Dolce & Gabbana green-grey pinstriped three-button suit with silk shirt and tie. His blonde hair was perfectly coiffed as he peered around the classroom. Barney noticed that his roster hadn’t lied about female students signing up for his class. Barney simply assumed they were lesbians, regardless of what Aly had told him.

"Listen up losers and lesbians!" Barney paced in front of the tables, shuddering as he noticed the manner in which the students were currently dressed. “Over the next several weeks, you will be enrolled in the most LEGEN- wait for it -DARY workshop to ever grace the halls of Fandom High. You will learn new concepts that you will need should you value your awesomeness and ever want to get laid.” Barney paused, looking pointedly at certain students.

"Today you will start your journey down the path to awesomeness. Our first roadblock is to rid you of your lemming-style jeans, t-shirts and,” Barney shuddered, “cargo pants. If you are to be taken seriously by women as a force to be reckoned with, you must SUIT UP!" With that, Barney grabbed the drape, dramatically uncovering a rack of expensive-looking suits in all shapes (yes, even female ones) and sizes. "These suits are yours to keep, and I expect you to suit up for every class this semester. If you don’t wear a suit to class, you will earn a special seat in detention. I promise you’ll be thanking me for this before the semester is over."

Barney waited for student reaction before continuing his version of a lecture. “Why should you wear a suit outside of class, you ask? That’s simple, people. Any man serious about the art of consistent layage needs to comprehend the following truism: Chicks love suits. Why? Because men look hot in suits. See Example A,” Barney gestured to his own incredibly hot, suit-clad body. “Wear your suit on a date and your date will be awesome, guaranteed.”

“Now lemmings, I want you to pick out a suit and put it on. There are trick suits on the suit rack. Your first challenge is to select a suit that will work for you. Then, I want each of you to introduce yourself, tell us why you’re in this workshop, and give your level of experience with women." Barney paused and looked around the room. "What are you waiting for? SUIT UP!”




[ooc: Please wait for OCD is up! Barney is providing all students with suits, so there should be no issues with students wearing them to workshops unless they want detention. When you sign in to future classes, simply tell about your suit or mention you are wearing one. Extra credit for suit icons, omg. If you are a girl and don’t want Barney to assume you are a lesbian, feel free to tell him so in the experience thread. Also, one line totally stolen borrowed from Barney's Blog.]

Comments

Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

Who are you and why did you sign up for this class? Also, describe the suit you chose. If you pick one of the uglies, he will make you get another one and try again.

Re: Why are you here?

[imissmydolphin.livejournal.com]

Lucas sceptically picked out a gray suit with a red collared shirt. Rather like in the icon, actually. "I'm Lucas Wolenczak and the name caught my attention. It looked like it would be fun without insanity and the mafia."

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"Good job suiting up, kid," Barney said, giving Lucas' suit the once over.

"They let the mafia teach classes here?"

Re: Why are you here?

[twohalvesofaphd.livejournal.com]

"I'm Zack Addy, and I'm pretty sure I didn't," Zack said, wearing a very conservative black suit that looked slightly too big on him.

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"It seems that god knew you needed this class, or at least the administration suspected as much. It's a damn good thing I'm teaching or you might never get laid." Barney looked over Zack's hair and slightly baggy suit. "We're gonna have to work on this."

Re: Why are you here?

[imcalledandros.livejournal.com]

Andros had picked out a black suit with a red shirt, "I'm called Andros," he said, "I think there's been some sort of mistake. I don't remember signing up for this class."

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"It's a good thing you're here," Barney said. "This class is the best public service you're ever gonna get!"

Re: Why are you here?

[izzyalienqueen.livejournal.com]

Isabel picked out a suit which looked just like her icon. "I'm Isabel Evans and apparently I didn't read the course description well enough."

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"Nice," Barney took in Isabel's besuited appearance and repeated his mantra. "You will bring up the level of hotness in the room."

Re: Why are you here?

[blessed_twice]

"I'm already awesome," Wyatt said, choosing a stylish black suit. "But I figured a refresher course would be fun."

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"Good choice, but who are you and why should I believe that you are awesome?" Barney raised an eyebrow.

Re: Why are you here?

[wannabe-pan.livejournal.com]

Andrew had a little trouble deciding between a gray pinstripe suit that looked pretty spiffy and classic and an all black number that he thought might make him incrementally more awesome. He would deffer to the teacher.

"I'm Andrew Wells. I signed up for this class because, well, I want to be the most awesome me I can be. And I totally think I could rock both these suits -- not at the same time, of course. That would just be weird. But if I can only have the one, um, which one do you think would be more awesome?"

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"I like your style, Andrew," Barney said thoughtfully. "Why don't you take them both. I'm sure you'll get a lot of use out of them after this class."

Re: Why are you here?

[fantastic-torch.livejournal.com]

"Black suit, pink shirt, silk tie," he said, adding with an eyebrow arch, "I'm not sure I can become more awesome than I am now, but I'm willing to try. Thus? Here I am."

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"I like the attitude kid! I have many awesome tricks to share," Barney grinned, he was pleased the student had picked a pastel shirt as it showed he lacked fear. "What's your name?"

Re: Why are you here?

[cantjossme.livejournal.com]

Mel glared at Barney as she eyed the suits. "I thought this was just a class about being Awesome. Not about picking up women."

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"They are not mutually exclusive activities," Barney replied. "You seem a little on the butch side. We'll get blondie over there to help you find a hot suit. I'm sure we can transform you, yet."

Re: Why are you here?

[by137.livejournal.com]

"Every girl's crazy 'bout a sharp dressed man..."

A.J. could really get to like this random music thing. He grinned as he pulled the centered his tie a little. He had picked a good suit; it was just a little too big and baggy for him, but he hadn't noticed.

"I'm A.J.," he said, "and how could you not want to take a class that's called How to be Awesome? I saw that and thought, 'Easy A.'" He laughed a little; it was said with more dorky conviction than any ounce of cockiness.

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"Hmm. I don't know how easy it will be for dorks who need a haircut, but I'll try my best to educate you in the ways of the awesome," Barney replied.

Re: Why are you here?

[surferboy-09er.livejournal.com]

Dick chose a black suit and a blue shirt to wear. "I'm Dick Casablancas. I'm actually pretty awesome already. But it can never hurt to get more tips."

Re: Why are you here?

[suit-of-awesome.livejournal.com]

"Dick! My wingman!" Barney was thrilled by the familiar face. "Here is a kid I can work with! He already understands the value of his awesomeness."

Re: Why are you here?

[willbedone.livejournal.com]

Willow went to pick out a suit, then frantically raised her hand when she didn't find what she was looking for.

Re: During the Lecture [7/12]

[chasingsnitches.livejournal.com]

"Cedric Diggory," he said, "and I'm here because I wanted to see if being awesome was something my former school took into account albeit via a different description."

Re: Why are you here?

[fat-halpert.livejournal.com]

Jim was wearing a basic light grey suit with a black tie. A very basic suit that you might find on a salesman at a mid-size paper company.

"My name is Jim Halpert and I just want to learn at the foot of the Master of Awesomeness. Samuel L Jackson refuses to answer my letters, though, so I thought this would help some."

Re: Why are you here?

[tiger-bouncer.livejournal.com]

"I'm Kou Leifoh," Kou said, having picked out a simple black suit and green tie. "I signed up for this class because I'm already awesome, I just wanted to confirm it." He shrugged, and frowned at how the suit moved. "And I just want to point out there's no way you can fight in one of these."