fandomhigh | Seven Easy Steps to Being Able to Convince People You're a Spy : Week 1, Period 1

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spies and spying

Seven Easy Steps to Being Able to Convince People You're a Spy : Week 1, Period 1

The class today was held in the Danger Shop for no other reason than it would make a list that Aly didn't actually have to write up. Which was good because she got to class just before the students and was carrying a larger box that she was glaring at upon occasion. She set the box down to the side with a strict admonishment to the inhabitants not to cry during class.

With a final glare at the box, Aly turned to greet the class. "Morning all," she said with a bright grin. "I'm Aly - which most of you already know, I think so I'll spare the usual speech about how if you call me Miss Aly, I'll be forced to make you very sorry." She wrinkled her nose. "It sounds like a Madam or something. Professor or duani is fine if you'd prefer a more formal title. The class we're in for the next seven weeks is 'Seven Easy Steps to Being Able to Convince People You're a Spy.' If that's not something you're interested in, you're probably in the wrong class so check your schedule or get interested fast."

"No one can learn how to be a spy in seven classes. Which is probably good because otherwise I'd be out of business both on the teaching end and the spying end. But we're going to talk about how to mimic a spy and some of a spy's basic skills that can help you give a certain impression. Unlike the class, last fall, we're barely going to touch on theory." She grinned. "Which makes me happy."

She hit a button and a list was projected by the

1. No matter where you are, act like you belong.
2. Behave purposefully. Especially if you have no purpose.
3. Blend in. Become a "gray man."
4. Develop assessment skills by practicing even in circumstances in which you are merely a bystander.
5. Learn to trust your instincts to make decisions. Right or wrong at first, they will get better.
6. Never second-guess your decisions at the time. Do analyze them later.
7. Be aware that you may be overlooking things in your surroundings, especially if they are familiar to you.
8. Accept the fact that some level of deception is a necessary part of the job.
9. Don't be embarrassed to be suspicious of other people's intentions.
10. Improve your memory.

"So here you go. The ten basic rules to being a spy. Easy right? Or maybe not quite so much. There could just as easily be twelve or seventeen or a hundred and fifty rules, but ten is such a nice round number. I'd like to spend today talking about these rules. Ask me questions or discuss them with a partner. Which one do you think is the most important?"

"Also so we all get to know each other, I'd like everyone to introduce themselves and tell a few things about yourself as well as your interest in spying. And if you know anything about cats? Throw that in too please." She eyed the box in the corner.

[OOC: The ten rules were taken with gratitude from the Handbook of Practical Spying by Jack Barth. OCD ~~will be coming~~ is up!]

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"My name is Karal Austreben, from the country of Karse, and I do not think I have any interest in spying," he frowned down at Altra, who was sitting next to him, looking smug, "but I am certain that will change after your class. As for random facts, umm, I am a Priest of Vkandis Sunlord, I have a horse named Trenor, and I know far more about certain cats than I would like to."

:I can deal with those kittens,: Altra told him, looking straight at Aly.

"And Altra can soothe your kittens, if you would like him to try," he added, trying not to sound surprised.

Aly glanced at Altra with an eyebrow quirked slightly then looked back at Karal. "A priest of a sun god?" she asked. "Those of my world are more interested in straightforwardnes. Spies are the purview of the Trickster"

"But I'd very much appreciate any help if Altra would wish to give it," she said with a bright smile to both Altra and Karal.

Karal ducked his head, smiling shyly, because this was the first time anyone had been so accepting of Vkandis' existence. "The Sunlord can be tricky," he said. "Though it is not His purview."

Altra was already trotting over to the kittens, ears slanted to the side. :Get them young, teach them proper respect,: he was muttering, and Karal stared after him as if he had lost his mind.

:Right, you two, behave.: He poked his nose in the box, and one of the kittens promptly bit it. :OW! What is it with the cats on this island?: One large paw flattened the kitten and Altra shook his head.

Karal was trying not to laugh, but at least the kittens seemed to have stopped crying.

She smiled at Karal. "And any knowledge is good for a priest."

Looking over at Altra, she beamed with pleasure. "Oh, they're quiet. That's fabulous. Are you a cat that likes shrimp or should I be insulting by offering?"

Altra just looked at her, the bitey kitten having squirmed out from under his paw to gnaw on his ear, and the other lying half-draped over his neck. :Shrimp. Lots. Or possibly a recipe for kitten stew:, he muttered, but gave the bitey one a surreptitious groom. Which he would forever deny doing.

"It is," Karal replied, still staring at Altra. "And he says shrimp would be acceptable." He was not repeating the other.

Aly smirked as she watched the cat grooming her kitten and thought just how much he reminded her of Faithful. Except bigger. And not black. And, you know, not a God.

"Shrimp it is then," she said. "With my gratitude."

Rikku gave the boy a sharp look. Gabriel was right, there was a priest here.

Great.

Karal was turning away from staring at Altra when he noticed the look and tentatively asked, "Is there something wrong?"

"Nope, I'm fine," she said brusquely. "I mean, unless you've got a problem with me."

She folded her arms, as if daring him to.

Completely bewildered, he tried to figure out what he'd done to give offence, and came up with nothing. "I don't think we've met," he said hesitantly. "Have we?"

Rikku shook her head quickly. "That guy downtown said you were a priest, too. I'm ... I'm an Al Bhed, you know." She stuck her chin out defiantly, trying to pretend she wasn't half-holding her breath already.

Oh well. Better to get this overwith now, right?

"Oh! You know Gabriel?" Karal perked up a little, though he did wonder what Gabriel had said about him to make her act so, after a moment's thought he went with, defensive. ""And yes, I am, as I told the teacher. A Priest of Vkandis, and no, I did not know you were an Al Bhed." He also didn't know what an Al Bhed was, but he didn't want to be rude.

"The guy in the temple? I fixed his fridge. Not really fixed, he didn't have it plugged in." She shrugged, pulling her arms in closer to hug herself. "Look, I've had a really bad week, so ... whatever you're gonna say, just say it, okay?"

The Judekitty caught the worried edge to her voice and poked his head out of the bag, stretching up to headbutt his Rikku with a mew.

"Yes, Gabriel. I have long suspected he was once a priest. Thank you for helping him," he said, smiling a little at the cat. Deeply confused he may be, but there was a nagging suspicion tugging at the edge of his mind. Maybe she knew of Karse? It could explain her reaction towards him. "I am truly sorry you are having a bad week," and she did look distressed, he realised, "is there anything I may do to help?"

"You think he was a priest?" she said hesitantly. "Look, that's not ... why I helped him, or whatever. He was a guy sitting somewhere and he needed food so I got him some. It shouldn't be, oh, hey, who gives a crap about that guy, wait, he's a priest, let's help him."

She folded her arms, almost sulky as she absently scooped the Judekitty out of her bag. "I don't need anything from you, okay? I'm ... my boyfriend's a cat and my big brother is ..." She closed her eyes. "I'm fine. I just wanted to know, that's all."

Whatever she was, she was far from fine, and it was distracting enough he didn't react to the feline boyfriend revelation. "I did not think that was why you helped him, and I am sorry I gave offence. I have no problem with you, I promise." Apart from the fact that he now worrying about her, training and inclination urging him to try and help. "And, forgive me, please, but I do not think you are entirely fine," he said carefully. "I am a very good listener, if you have need of such a thing."

"No, I didn't mean me, I meant ... would you even care if he wasn't? It's ..." Rikku shook her head. "You really don't know, about the Al Bhed thing? I mean, you're not gonna ... freak out or whatever?"

She took a deep breath, focusing on the cat in her lap, who was now headbutting her hands and mrowling lightly. "You ... you seem really nice and all, but ... I'm okay. I don't need ... I don't know what you're offering, but I don't do that whole ... thing."

Dammit. She was being really rude to someone who was probably just a nice guy but he was a priest and Hamlet was dead and any minute now he was going to give her the "oh, you're an UNBELIEVER" look and anyway she was trying to be sort of civil and that was something, right?

Karal bit his lip and moved closer. "I am offering only to listen, to help, if you think I may. It has nothing to do with whether one is, or was, a priest, or a follower of the Sunlord. Vkandis tells us to help any who need it and look not to the naming of names," he said as simply as he knew how, speaking quietly. "And I have offered because it is my - my job? I suppose that is right. It is something I must do, as flying is something that a bird must do."

"The naming of names?" Rikku shook her head, confused. "I'm ... I'm not. A follower or believer or ... that's what I meant. We Al Bhed don't do that kinda stuff. That's why the Yevonites ... you know."

She let that hang and went back to scratching Judekitty's ears. "You don't have to ... I didn't mean to be rude or whatever. I just, if you were gonna start railing about having to have class with a heathen or whatever, I kinda wanted to get it out of the way now."

He smiled kind of sadly and looked at the ground. "I thought Al Bhed-- I thought it meant you followed a specific deity. And I think it is I who have been rude," he sighed. "I apologise. I am not going to rail against you because you do not share my faith, I give you my word, and I will leave you in peace. Just," he glanced up at her, "the offer stands, should you ever wish it. No belief in the Sunlord required."

Karal paused, about to turn away, then tentatively added, "And, given I'm the only member of the Kin on this island, then it might be me who is more properly described as the heathen."

"You're not rude," Rikku said quickly. "I'm ... the Al Bhed are my people. And back home they hated us and destroyed our stuff and ..."

She bit her lip. "I get jumpy. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be a jerk, I just ... I keep waiting for someone to say it and ... I thought it'd be you, that's all."

She stared at her cat very carefully. "Do people ... do they really find ... comfort, in that kinda thing? I mean, I know ... I know it's all made up, I just ... that must be nice, you know? If you could believe, or whatever. I guess."

He studied her, and decided she didn't want to hear about Vkandis manifesting in the world. "Faith is a comfort," he said, and smiled gently. "You were not a jerk, merely cautious, and I can understand that. If you have been subject to persecution, it is not surprising that you would expect it."

"I kinda was a jerk," she said, shrugging with a wry smile. "I, uh, maybe religion's different here, too. Professor Lyman said government was. I mean, maybe it's not ... as bad, or whatever." She was really skeptical on that one, but he seemed nice enough, and it wouldn't hurt to say.

"How is it ... a comfort? I mean, Yevon was all 'the dead have reached the Farplane, therefore it's okay' and you're still going, 'yeah, but they're dead and they should be alive and it's not okay, it's never gonna be okay, you can't just ...'" She swallowed hard as she realized that was probably louder than she meant it to be.

"Religion is, well, religion is what men make of a god's will. Sometimes they get it...very, very wrong," he said, voice carefully neutral. "And sometimes the god may not be a god at all, but a demon or a mage." He shook his head, not wanting to subject her to a lecture. "Let us call the matter even, yes? Either we were both a jerk or neither of us was."

Looking at her closely, he considered her words, her tone, finding it familiar. It reminded him of the time after Ulrich's death, when he had...No. "It is a comfort if you believe that they continue on, but it does not lessen the pain of losing someone you love. Only time, I think, and allowing people to care for you, can do that, but yes, I...it is never okay that they are gone."

"That's what Ares said. That since we killed Yevon, he must not have been a real god." She folded her arms. "Maybe they're all fake. If they're not, why does it even matter? What did not using machina and killing off Summoners have to do with him being fake? Would it have been suddenly a really good idea if he was real? No, it wouldn't."

She looked down, still flushed with anger. "I used to be better at this. You move on because you have to and ... that's all there is and I used to be better at this."

Seven Easy Steps to Being Able to Convince People You're a Spy : Week 1, Period 1

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