fandomhigh | Dealing With Stupid People [Monday, June 11, 2nd period]

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stupid people

Dealing With Stupid People [Monday, June 11, 2nd period]

Josh leaned up against a desk in the Danger Room, hands in his pocket and a grin on his face.

"President Andrew Jackson, in the main foyer of his White House, had a big block of cheese and I can't believe I'm giving this speech," he began. "He did not, sadly, have a cracker the size of Lake Tahoe. I checked. My old boss, the White House Chief of Staff, used this folksy excuse to make us all talk to total crackpots once a year and today that privilege falls to you."

He waved his hands. "Pick a desk, make yourself comfortable, the computer'll drop someone insane off to talk to you. Try not to laugh in their faces--they're all based on real people. Um, sadly."

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"It's not a conspiracy," Zack said. "The presence of immigrants in our country has been widely publicised for a number of years."

"Huh? Oh, no, the crazy 'build a wall' people are coming in later," the man said, making a face. "I'm talking about real aliens. Spaceships. Roswell." His voice dropped to a hoarse whisper. "Probing..."

"Sir," Zack said. "Provided that all such acts are taking place between consenting adults, what people in this country get up to in the bedroom is none of our government's concern."

The man threw up his hands. "Not that kind of probing!" he squeaked. "I've seen all of the episodes of Galaxy Quest! and what two men do together is no one's business but their own. Especially if one of them is Commander Taggart. But I'm talking about real life. Crop circles. Military secrets." He waggled his eyebrows. "You know what I'm talking about."

"I'm afraid I don't," Zack said. "I'm attached to the civil services, not the military branches."

The man frowned. "But you're in the White House. Don't they answer to you?"

"I'm a lower level aide attached to the public relations department," Zack said. "I answer to people, not the other way around."

"Oh," the man said, disappointed. "Can you put me in contact with someone more important?"

"Of course," Zack said. "You're going to need to look for a Josh Lyman, that's Lyman spelt L-Y-M-A-N, he'll be able to answer all of your questions."

The man wrote the name down carefully. "Thank you, young man," he said. "You've been very helpful."

"Don't mention it," Zack said. "I'm just doing my job."

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Dealing With Stupid People [Monday, June 11, 2nd period]

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