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The Swedish Chef comes into the cafeteria wearing a hat in the shape of a chicken and white and red checkered shorts. And only that. Upon closer inspection you see that the hat is really a chicken. His favorite chicken, Das Schnitzel. The Chef picked her up in Berlin back in the 60s.

It's Freedey leettle-a derleengs! I knoo yuoo ere-a ebuoot tu ureenete-a yuoor punts veet zee thuooght ooff zee veekend cumeeng tu yuoo. Und veet thet tudey's menoo fur September 23 is oone-a ooff my fefureete-a meels:

-Cheeckee in da baskee: cuuked oor livfe-a. Sume-a peuple-a seem tu vunt cuuked cheeckee in a plesteec besket veet sume-a putetu freees. Vhet is thet ell ebuoot?

-Shellffeesh. Vhet keend ooff shellffeesh? I dun't ifee knoo! Das Schnitzel deed zee shuppeeng fur me-a.

-Chuculete-a moose-a (Iff unyune-a vuoold leeke-a zee hurns pleese-a esk me-a. Thuoogh iff I get a lut ooff tekers ve-a meeght hefe-a tu pley ruck peper cheeckee tu deceede-a vhu gets zeem.)

The Chef pulls a live chicken from out of the breadbox and faces the direction of a basketball hoop he had placed othere this morning. He shoots...HE SCORES!

Cheeckee in da baskee! Bork Bork Bork!