http://certaintrouble.livejournal.com/ (![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
certaintrouble.livejournal.com) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2007-01-30 10:51 pm
certaintrouble.livejournal.com) wrote in fandomhigh2007-01-30 10:51 pm
Entry tags:
U.S. History- Wednesday 1/31, Period Three
The bell rang.
Do you think that Mr. Noblet was in the classroom when it did?
If so, you haven’t been paying attention these past few weeks, have you?
About a minute after the bell rang, Chuck entered at a leisurely pace, engrossed in a thin book, one no bigger than a script. He set it gently on his briefcase, and looked at the class.
“All right. Today we are going to discuss the most important period in our nation’s history. Namely, the Revolutionary War.” He picked up a piece of chalk and wrote the title on the board, then turned back around. He had a weird, rather intense look on his face.
He actually seemed interested in what he was teaching.
“If you’ve done the reading for this week, then you’ll know how things began. For those of you who have been slacking and are depending on me to make sure that “No Child is Left Behind,” be sure to remember that I’m only doing a little review for your sake. And because it’s required by federal law.
The British were up to their eyeballs in debt by this point. Nationally, they’d racked up quite the tab for German beer, and it looked like Deutschland was gonna collect real soon. So they instituted taxes on the American people. This was bad enough without representation, but what rally ticked the colonists off were the tax forms, which were extremely complicated.
It wasn’t long before some saw the need for change. The few that saw were members of the colonies’ useless governing body; the Continental Congress. This group, far from aiding their nation, swamped our founding fathers in endless litigation, and for years denied to grant a single proposal of independence, even the courtesy of open debate.” Mr. Noblet looked peeved. “Do you know how long they were kept away from their families and their loved ones? Months! Locked up in that stuffy Philadelphia heat! And later on, when they were drafting the constitution, they were again stuck working for months on end, unable to return home!
John Adams and Ben Franklin got fed up the fastest. They spent months garnering support, fighting for a united front for independence. After much hard work and effort, they convinced enough people to join and sign their Declaration of Independence. Truth be told, they had difficulty getting the thing written in the first place. John Adams had to threaten Thomas Jefferson with physical harm before he could force Jefferson to do it.
"And still they were kept away from their loved ones, leading the country, arguing and arguing! Can you imagine how desperate some of them might have gotten? How much they would have yearned to go home to their lovers and wives? They would have given anything to see them, if it weren’t for the hundreds of miles between Philadelphia and their hometowns!” He pounded his fist on the desk. “And it’s just too far a distance between New Jersey and Virginia! How can I be expected to put up with this?!”
Mr. Noblet stopped, almost red in the face. He looked at his desk, taking a second to calm down.
“Right. The Revolutionary War.” He looked up again, and the lecture was back to the regularly scheduled truthiness.
“The Continental Congress knew that they were in for the fight of their lives, and assembled an army. They needed an experienced leader, a battle-scarred, admired, beast of a man. Of course, the man they wanted was Chuck Norris, but as he would not be born for well over a century, they made do with George Washington.
“As we all know,” Mr. Noblet lectured, “George Washington was approximately six foot twenty, and often killed for fun. But who was the man behind the legend? Well, a true story about his youth gives us insight.
One bright morning, being the reckless scamp that most children are, he decided to chop down his father’s cherry tree.
When his father asked him, later that day, Washington responded ‘I cannot tell a lie. I did it.’
Thus, it was evident that Washington would never be a truly great politician. For one thing, politicians must be able to lie. If they cannot, they eventually climb into a pork barrel and die.
“In the end, it was really due to Eli Whitney’s timely invention of the cannon that the American soldiers were finally able to grasp victory over the English.”
Though Mr. Noblet was mid-lecture, time was running out, and he figured that it was time to let the kids ask questions. Not that he really felt like letting them toss in their two cents. Chuck Noblet didn’t need their filthy spare change. “Okay, that’s where we’ll stop for today. Any questions?”
[ooc: The lecture is up,but where is the ocd? Hush and be patient, my muffins. and so is the ocd! Frolic in the joyful land of History!
Sorry. I'm feeling a little weird tonight.]
Do you think that Mr. Noblet was in the classroom when it did?
If so, you haven’t been paying attention these past few weeks, have you?
About a minute after the bell rang, Chuck entered at a leisurely pace, engrossed in a thin book, one no bigger than a script. He set it gently on his briefcase, and looked at the class.
“All right. Today we are going to discuss the most important period in our nation’s history. Namely, the Revolutionary War.” He picked up a piece of chalk and wrote the title on the board, then turned back around. He had a weird, rather intense look on his face.
He actually seemed interested in what he was teaching.
“If you’ve done the reading for this week, then you’ll know how things began. For those of you who have been slacking and are depending on me to make sure that “No Child is Left Behind,” be sure to remember that I’m only doing a little review for your sake. And because it’s required by federal law.
The British were up to their eyeballs in debt by this point. Nationally, they’d racked up quite the tab for German beer, and it looked like Deutschland was gonna collect real soon. So they instituted taxes on the American people. This was bad enough without representation, but what rally ticked the colonists off were the tax forms, which were extremely complicated.
It wasn’t long before some saw the need for change. The few that saw were members of the colonies’ useless governing body; the Continental Congress. This group, far from aiding their nation, swamped our founding fathers in endless litigation, and for years denied to grant a single proposal of independence, even the courtesy of open debate.” Mr. Noblet looked peeved. “Do you know how long they were kept away from their families and their loved ones? Months! Locked up in that stuffy Philadelphia heat! And later on, when they were drafting the constitution, they were again stuck working for months on end, unable to return home!
John Adams and Ben Franklin got fed up the fastest. They spent months garnering support, fighting for a united front for independence. After much hard work and effort, they convinced enough people to join and sign their Declaration of Independence. Truth be told, they had difficulty getting the thing written in the first place. John Adams had to threaten Thomas Jefferson with physical harm before he could force Jefferson to do it.
"And still they were kept away from their loved ones, leading the country, arguing and arguing! Can you imagine how desperate some of them might have gotten? How much they would have yearned to go home to their lovers and wives? They would have given anything to see them, if it weren’t for the hundreds of miles between Philadelphia and their hometowns!” He pounded his fist on the desk. “And it’s just too far a distance between New Jersey and Virginia! How can I be expected to put up with this?!”
Mr. Noblet stopped, almost red in the face. He looked at his desk, taking a second to calm down.
“Right. The Revolutionary War.” He looked up again, and the lecture was back to the regularly scheduled truthiness.
“The Continental Congress knew that they were in for the fight of their lives, and assembled an army. They needed an experienced leader, a battle-scarred, admired, beast of a man. Of course, the man they wanted was Chuck Norris, but as he would not be born for well over a century, they made do with George Washington.
“As we all know,” Mr. Noblet lectured, “George Washington was approximately six foot twenty, and often killed for fun. But who was the man behind the legend? Well, a true story about his youth gives us insight.
One bright morning, being the reckless scamp that most children are, he decided to chop down his father’s cherry tree.
When his father asked him, later that day, Washington responded ‘I cannot tell a lie. I did it.’
Thus, it was evident that Washington would never be a truly great politician. For one thing, politicians must be able to lie. If they cannot, they eventually climb into a pork barrel and die.
“In the end, it was really due to Eli Whitney’s timely invention of the cannon that the American soldiers were finally able to grasp victory over the English.”
Though Mr. Noblet was mid-lecture, time was running out, and he figured that it was time to let the kids ask questions. Not that he really felt like letting them toss in their two cents. Chuck Noblet didn’t need their filthy spare change. “Okay, that’s where we’ll stop for today. Any questions?”
[ooc: The lecture is up,
Sorry. I'm feeling a little weird tonight.]
Sign in
Re: Sign in
Re: Sign in
Re: Sign in
Re: Sign in
Re: Sign in
Re: Sign in
Re: Sign in
Re: Sign in
no subject
no subject
Re: Question authority
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
"Well, we all know that the fight would be over with a roundhouse kick to the face, but until that devastating finishing move, Washington would put up one hell of a fight." Mr. Noblet looked solemn. "He was no pansy. Washington killed his sensei in a duel... and never said why."
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
"Is it true that Jefferson started experiencing mission creep in the Declaration once he realized that, much like rental agreements, nobody was going to read past the first paragraph?"
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Re: Question authority
Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
[ooc: In other words, if you want a detention, look no further. He needs no reason save the sound of your voice to slap one on you.]
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
((She's in for it. Oh well.))
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
Re: Talk to Mr. Noblet after class
OOC
Anyway, citing my sources:
Dave Barry Slept Here, Dave Barry
Washington, Brad Neely (If you didn’t catch the reference, don’t worry. There is no honor in having seen that video.)
and, of course, the musical 1776. (Believe it or not, that's from where the facts came.)
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC
Re: OOC