fandomhigh | Good Omens...And Bad: Prophecy in Theory and Practice, Class Eight

Monday, October 23, First Period

The classroom doesn't look much different than it did during Parents Weekend, except for the addition of a large tropical fish aquarium against one wall. In it are swimming five very content looking fish. If it doesn't seem to have any significance to the topic of Prophecy, that's because...well, it doesn't. Aziraphale just likes the fish.

"Today we're going to cover several somewhat lesser utilized methods of divination. Specifically, we'll be talking about elemental methods and handful of what you could call the most common of the less common -- including my personal favorite, the reading of tea leaves. There's even a form of divination using specially designed computer programs, although that one is somewhat under dispute."

LECTURE:
Geomancy (earth)
Pyromancy (fire)
Hydromancy (water)
Aeromancy (atmopheric conditions)
Tasseography/Tasseomancy (tea)
Numerology (numbers)
Bibliomancy (books)
Cybermancy (computer programs)

Class Participation:
"In honor of our recent Parents Weekend experience, I'd like each of you to share one thing about the past three days that you wish you'd read a prophecy about beforehand."

Homework:
"To prepare for next week's class, I want you to write briefly about a historical personage associated with prophecy, telling whether you'd like to change places with that person, and why or why not."

Syllabus
Class Roster
Classes Linkdrop

[ooc: ~~As always, please wait for~~ OCD is up! Go!.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

The colorless part wasn't so surprising after the experience of Homecoming Weekend, but two-dimensional was a new one. "Er...well, I can certainly see why that make it difficult for you to attend class. Your absence is excused, Mr Anders. And you can get the homework assignment from one of your classmates and turn it in next week."

Well, no, the colorless part was kind of old hat to Anders by now, what with Becky and Miho, and the monochrome Sex Ed workshops. It had been the whole whitespace thing that had freaked him out. "Yeah, I'll do that. I'm really, really sorry, and I am never going to say 'Wow, this comic book really sucks you in' in front of the comic book again."

Aziraphale couldn't entirely hold back a little laugh at that. "It's quite all right, Mr Anders. Do you know...I really had never thought much about the dangers of talking in front of one's reading material before. I suppose you never know what you're going to learn here. Perhaps the administrators ought to consider offering a class on Fandom itself."

"Aw, but the mystery's half the adventure," Anders said. "I mean, these'll make great party stories for the rest of our lives. 'sides, I don't know if anybody has been able to figure most of these things out."

"True, I suppose it wouldn't be nearly as much fun if we knew ahead of time what to expect," Aziraphale chuckled. "What was it like, then...being part of a comic?"

"Emotionally exhausting," Anders said, the roll of his eyes saying far more than the words did. "I could have at least been reading a superhero comic or something, you know, then it would've been all running around and saving the world, but no, I had to be reading Unknowns in Eden instead, and all we did was argue and angst for days, and occasionally break furniture. Except for those two panels where we got the threatening phone call from Marcy Driver's organized crime syndicate . . ."

Actually, Aziraphale thought it sounded rather fascinating, but he could see where the superhero gig would have been much more attractive to Anders. Then again, days of arguing and angsting wasn't really all that unusual an occurance around Fandom.

"Well...that sounds as though it had promise, at least. Never actually got around to interacting with the organized crime syndicate?"

"They weren't really in this volume," Anders said wistfully. "It would've been a nice break from the emo, though, I mean, I do that enough."

"That is a shame," he agreed. "I suppose you could always consider it a learning experience. Normally I wouldn't imagine a person might want to know how to react to being suddenly made a character in a comic book story. But around here...who knows? Too bad it isn't something you can learn to control, though, isn't it? Might be interesting to go back and try out the next volume."

"That is not the superpower I'd like to have, if I had one," Anders grinned. "Not that I'm much of a reader, but I used to think I would've loved to jump into some of the stuff I did read --" he was pointedly avoiding the fact that this material was probably posted on the Internet -- "and be part of the story. I think I've changed my mind."

"Rather like that warning about getting what you wish for?" Aziraphale replied, chuckling. "Yes, I expect that the world is just perverse enough to not actually give you the story you want to be in, but something similar and yet not at all what you were hoping for. Just to teach you a lesson."

He thought about some of his favorite reading, and decided that while the 'historical novels' might not be so bad, he was fairly certain he'd just as soon avoid getting stuck in most of the prophetic works. They tended to be far too much about burning things up and raining unpleasant things from the sky.

"If the whole world isn't that perverse, Fandom sure is." Anders shook his head and started to stuff his books back into his backpack. "If there's anything that defies prophecy, I bet it's all the weird little things that happen here."

"Do you know," Aziraphale agreed, "I don't believe I've ever seen a single prophecy related to Fandom. It might be an interesting thing to find out. Perhaps I'll have to see if the library will let me into their Special Collection."

"Aw, Special Collections. I haven't been in there since I the time I got myself wedged into a shelf, way back during Zombie Weekend, and I wasn't exactly in the condition to look at the books at the time." Anders shook his head, a wistful smile quirking the corners of his mouth. "Gods. I've changed so much since then. It feels like a fr -- a lifetime ago. Which . . . I don't think I would have wanted to know about."

"I think we've all changed a great deal in the past year. But I think it's been good change for the most part, for myself at least." Aziraphale nodded at the little smile, knowing exactly what Anders meant. "Despite that I'm teaching a class on prophecy, I frankly think knowing the future is overrated. Not to mention dangerous, but I think the biggest danger is that if you know about it, how can you enjoy the novelty and surprise of what happens to you? You're always sure to be disappointed, because it can never live up to the image you paint in your mind. Prophecies in general are interesting, as long as they're about someone else, I think."

Good Omens...And Bad: Prophecy in Theory and Practice, Class Eight

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