Sam Eagle (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
but_mostly_america) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomhigh2023-10-26 05:22 pm
but_mostly_america) wrote in fandomhigh2023-10-26 05:22 pm
Sam Eagle Presents: The Weird States of America, Thursday 10/26
Sam was not late how dare you at the front of the classroom, as usual.
The branded clothing from a variety of establishments (but not Hooters, Sam would never stoop so low as to advertise for owls) he was wearing was decidedly unusual. Especially considering Sam very rarely wore clothing at all!
"Today, students, we shall talk about a weird aspect of the state of Minnesota! There are, of course, many odd things about that state as there are odd things about all of them. But today we shall focus on one thing. One very large and famous thing. Yes, students, today we shall learn about The Mall of America!"
Sam, in all his branded glory, looked out over the students.
"Of course, it is nonsense to try to claim this mall is representative of our entire country. However, they do seem to value being American and I do appreciate that! Although the mall sells any number of items not American-made! Which is frankly appalling."
Sam, buddy, your branded gear was almost certainly all made in sweatshops in various countries.
"Not even all of the stores are American! I find this very offensive. An establishment claiming to be The Mall of America ought to be fully American! And of course the sheer size of the place is absurd. There is no excuse for it! If it were fully American they could have built something far more reasonable!"
The branded clothing from a variety of establishments (but not Hooters, Sam would never stoop so low as to advertise for owls) he was wearing was decidedly unusual. Especially considering Sam very rarely wore clothing at all!
"Today, students, we shall talk about a weird aspect of the state of Minnesota! There are, of course, many odd things about that state as there are odd things about all of them. But today we shall focus on one thing. One very large and famous thing. Yes, students, today we shall learn about The Mall of America!"
Sam, in all his branded glory, looked out over the students.
"Of course, it is nonsense to try to claim this mall is representative of our entire country. However, they do seem to value being American and I do appreciate that! Although the mall sells any number of items not American-made! Which is frankly appalling."
Sam, buddy, your branded gear was almost certainly all made in sweatshops in various countries.
"Not even all of the stores are American! I find this very offensive. An establishment claiming to be The Mall of America ought to be fully American! And of course the sheer size of the place is absurd. There is no excuse for it! If it were fully American they could have built something far more reasonable!"