http://certaintrouble.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] certaintrouble.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] fandomhigh2007-09-20 09:56 am
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US History- Thursday, September 20

Chuck entered the class seconds after the bell rang. “Hello, class.” He paused, as if expecting a response. When none came, he just looked annoyed.


“We’ll be talking about colonial life today.” He wrote “Colonial Life” on the board.

“The Puritans sailed to America the day after the Pilgrims left. Originally, they’d meant for the whole thing to be a race, but the Pilgrims had their map upside down, and sailed to Cuba first. Not wanting to be ruled by Castro (Castro has always ruled Cuba), they got their map right-side-up, and headed for America.” He wrote some dates down on the board as he spoke. It was dubious that the dates had anything at all to do with the topic at hand.

“There, the puritans met the Indians, and after the nerve-wracking siege of Tiras Minth, drove them out of their new homes, making the place more habitable. Eli Whitney, clever turnip that he was, built something called a wood chipper. The Puritans used this new invention to put the newly cut trees to good use. Mulch continues to be a respected American tradition to this day.

“To celebrate the feigned equality between the Indians and the Puritans, everyone celebrated the first Thanksgiving. The main course was to be roast eagle with all the trimmings, but due to a mix-up, the guests ended up eating turkey. And so a great tradition was born, and a noble beast saved from the chopping block and Eli’s wood chipper.”

Chuck stopped writing on the board. "Aaaaaaannnd I'm finished teaching for today. Any questions?"


OOC: Be ready in a shortly... Class is ready!

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