Fandom High School

Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 17 Dec 2025 13:02:17 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

Class was in the Danger Shop, and your teachers were actually there. Isabela stood at the wheel of the increasingly improbable star ship, and Aphra was making a show of looking though a pair of electrobinoculars.

"It's our last class today, and we've trained you well for our maiden voyage through the stars." Had you Isabela? Had you? "Luckily, it should be easy sailing."

As if very subtly prompted Aphra waved her hands and yelled "Enemy fleet to starboard!"

Was she going to elaborate on which enemy it was? No, Aphra had far too many to pick one.

"To stations, crew," Isabela declared. "They'll never take us."

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 03 Dec 2025 13:17:51 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

Once more, the projector was set up on the deck of the space starship.

"Welcome back, hope you all enjoyed pondering your orbs!" Thank you for that greeting, Aphra.

"Today we'll be looking at the importance of your crew," Isabela said. "Because you can't get much done without a good crew at your back."

Yes, it was time. They'd honestly been very good holding off on it so far this semester.

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 26 Nov 2025 13:53:28 GMT

Posted by: jedigrammarians

There was a sign on the door of the Danger Shop today.

Class cancelled due to upcoming holiday.

HAPPY LIFE DAY! ENJOY YOUR ORBS!

What? What other holiday was Aphra going to celebrating this time of year?

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 19 Nov 2025 12:36:50 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

Today's class was in the computer lab. Why?

Well, Aphra was glad you asked. "Today we're going to be pirates in cyberspace," Aphra declared, with a wave of her arm that somehow drew even more attention to her electro-tattoo than usual.

"Cyberspace is a place of adventure and danger," Isabela declared, albeit not very convincingly because it wasn't like they'd actually be leaving the very safe computer lab now was it. "And porn."

"Not that we'd know anything about that." It wasn't the least convincing thing either of them had ever uttered in a class, but only because the bar was so very low. "Moving on..."

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 05 Nov 2025 13:48:05 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

Only one of your teachers was present today, and there was the projector set up. It didn't take a genius to figure out where this was going.

"Chelli had something terribly important to do," Isabela informed them. "So, sounds like a perfect time for a movie day."

Even if Aphra hadn't been absent, it would have rapidly become clear that Isabela had picked the movie.

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 29 Oct 2025 13:17:41 GMT

Posted by: jedigrammarians

"Everyone who stole the yacht, good job at figuring out the secret break assignment." There had not been a secret break assignment, but retroactively assigning one meant they didn't have to figure out a topic for this week.

"Everyone who didn't steal the yacht, explain why you didn't even try to be piratical." Isabela would not be accepting, but you stole it first as an excuse. She'd only taken it the once.

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 15 Oct 2025 12:18:09 GMT

Posted by: jedigrammarians

Yet again, Aphra and Isabela had a projector set up on the deck of the Danger Shop ship.

"So apprently there's going to be a whole thing with an island next week," Aphra started. "So we thought we get into why islands are important to pirates."

"Through film!" Because why have an actual lecture when this was much more effective?

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 08 Oct 2025 13:35:41 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

Today class was being held at Cafe Fina, because, yes, your teachers had once again finagled their expense reports to justify brunch.

"So, food," Isabela started. "Any kind of pirate has to eat, but the downside of the open seas or the wilds of space is that they tend to be somewhat lacking in places to catch a quick bite."

"And rations suck," was Aphra's very eloquent contribution. "Half the reason they last so long is no one wants to eat them."

"Which is why when pirates do make landfall, one of the first things they do with their ill gotten gains is make for the nearest place of merriment to help sate all their hungers." All of them.

Aphra gestured with her mimosa. "So we're skipping the rations and going straight to that for this class."

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 01 Oct 2025 14:10:28 GMT

Posted by: jedigrammarians

The ship was not in evidence today, and neither was one of your teachers. The other one was also halfway out the door.

"Listen, I have to go talk to Isabela about some of her life choices," Aphra said in a tone that implied that she couldn't believe that either. She was not supposed to be the responsible one. "You got a movie!"

So now you had no pirate ship and no teachers.

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 24 Sep 2025 14:05:26 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

"Good news, everyone," Isabela announced, which was often a debatable fact where Isabela's announcements were concerned. "Today we'll be taking flight on the ship, so get to the rigging so we can set sail and catch the winds."

Yes, the winds of space. Famously a thing. Well, they were in the simulation at least, since once the sails were set, something filled them.

Once the ship had been sailing along those highly unscientific nebulae for long enough for the class to get a feel for it, Aphra gasped dramatically. "Asteroid field, dead ahead, Captain!"

"All hands on deck," Isabela called out, even though, lets face it, everyone was probably already right there. "We're going to need some fancy sailing!"

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 17 Sep 2025 14:01:53 GMT

Posted by: jedigrammarians

They were still on the completely-impossible-to -actually-be-a-space-pirate ship for a third class in a row, this time bobbing along through an entirely scientifically inaccurate nebula.

"Today we're going to be talking about the main reason anyone becomes a pirate, space or otherwise," Aphra told them by way of greeting. "People will tell many reasons why they might become a pirate, and some of them are even true."

"Freedom of the open sea, issues with authority, the fashion," Isabela listed off on her fingers. "But when it all comes down to it, it's the loot. Everyone wants a piece of that booty." Which probably explained why she was perched on top of a treasure chest.

"Today we're going to talk about the kind of things that a space pirate might consider loot," Aphra said. "And the friends we made along the way don't count, unless you literally made them and not just metaphorically."

"After that, we'll leave it to you to figure out how to divvy up your loot," Isabela said, standing and opening the chest to reveal it was full of chocolate coins.

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 10 Sep 2025 13:16:29 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

Class was in the Danger Shop again, and the not-actually-a-space-ship was present again, this time with deck chairs and a projector set up on its deck.

"Welcome back," Isabela greeted them cheerfully, because they were just not talking about last week, basically. "Space is full of darkness and terror, or so I'm told."

Mostly by Aphra, who, while not lying exactly, had no problems exaggerating those terrors to impress women or get a high rate of danger pay. "So today we'll be watching an instructional film about those terrors."

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Space Pirates! (Pirates in Space!) [Wednesday, 1st Period]

Wed, 03 Sep 2025 14:08:35 GMT

Posted by: jedigrammarians

Class was being held in the Danger Shop today, and for once Aphra and Isabela had been organised enough to actually set up the simulation in advance, because as it was, you were lucky that Chelli and Isabela even knew they had class, let alone that they were supposed to be the ones teaching it.

"So, space piracy," Chelli said after a long, awkward silence, and the slow, terrible realisation her name was on the wrong spot on the roster. "It's a thing."

"Luckily, as a pirate captain, I know all about piracy, " Isabela added confidently, despite the fact she'd been a pirate and a captain for roughly a week, and her crew had just abandoned her.

"And I know about space," Chelli said. "Because I'm from it." She wished she was there right now, actually.

"So between us, you'll learn all there is to know about space piracy," Isabela said, then dramatically pressed the button that she was relatively sure was the on switch for the magic room.

It was an a magnificent pirate ship and a majestic space backdrop faded into viewed. Unfortunately for reasons that had completely made sense (hilarious sense, even) at the time, it was not a starship.

Chelli looked at the ship for another long, awkward moment, and considered her options. Including arson.

"So...introductions?"

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Buckle Those Swashes, Tuesday 3rd Period

Tue, 15 Aug 2023 13:50:27 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

"So it's the final class!" Which Isabela and Aphra had not prepared for in the slightest. "Which means it's time for a daring and life-threatening task!" Because Isabela was good at improvising.

"Or you can watch a holo," Aphra suggested.

"That does seem like less effort." Such work ethic! "But we've already watched our usual one."

Aphra was already on her comm. "I'm sure there's plenty of suitable ones. We can just pick at random."

Which was how the class ended up watching a bunch of randos' actual play.

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Buckle Those Swashes, Tuesday 3rd Period

Tue, 08 Aug 2023 13:41:42 GMT

Posted by: jedigrammarians

"We still have not apprehended our hat thief." Isabela felt it was vitally, vitally important to start with this. "Which leads to our subject today, drowning your sorrows."

"Booze is surprising vital to piracy, even in space where you'd think synthesising potable water would be one of the first things taken care of."

"Unfortunately, outside of this island most other parts of this world are ridiculously uptight about 'appropriate drinking ages'."

Did this mean that they were going to be something vaguely resembling responsible here.

"So today we're going to teach you about making fake IDs!"

No. No it did not.

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Buckle Those Swashes, Tuesday 3rd Period

Tue, 01 Aug 2023 13:44:02 GMT

Posted by: good_for_six

Once again class was being held on the deck of the Siren's Call, and both your teachers were there for the second week in a row.

"Whether at sea or in space, piracy relies upon instincts," Isabela started. "Honing them to be razor sharp so you can find loot or avoid trouble without even thinking about it."

"Of course honing those instincts requires danger," Aphra added. "Which can be hard in a place like this, which for all its weirdness is pretty peaceful and safe. Like, you can just tell this is going to be a pretty boring week, unless you count whatever's happening in the park tomorrow."

"How can you say that," Isabela asked aghast. "There is something deeply wrong on this island right now. Someone has stolen my hat!"

"Right your hat. Pretty much the worst thing that could happen. Okay, new class exercise kids, let's hunt down a hat thief."

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Pirating!, Monday, Period one

Mon, 21 Jun 2021 16:19:46 GMT

Posted by: betterthanaplan

"Right, so," Duke said, when it looked like everyone who was going to arrive had. "Seems like our resident actual for-real pirate is off doing important . . . pirating." He shrugged. "So you're stuck with me today. And I . . . have no real plans for this. Going by the seat of your pants is totally piratical, right?"

Sure. Why not?

"Anyway. It's our last week, I was very hungover yesterday, and I don't know about you, but chilling and watching a movie is about my speed right now. So, uh, here's an old classic. As interpreted by puppets. Enjoy."

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Pirating, Monday

Mon, 14 Jun 2021 17:42:06 GMT

Posted by: doesnotkneel

"Walking the plank!" Duke crowed. He was in a fine mood this morning. "Perhaps the most famous method of execution reputedly enjoyed by pirates of old. What do you say, Ed? You ever make a mutineer walk the plank?"

"It's actually not nearly as common as modern myths and fancies insist," Edward said, crossing his arms. He looked amused. "Mutineers are more likely to get a cutlass to the neck, or marooned on an island with no food or drink. But let's not let that get in the way of our class, shall we?"

"But we are making you walk the plank," Edward said, smirking. "Hope you did bring something to swim in properly."

"If you don't know how to swim. . . . ." Duke said, shrugging. "You'll get about thirty seconds to figure it out yourself before you suffer the indignity of being rescued."

"If you're wondering what this has to do with the class, well..." Edward smirked. "Plenty of pirates fall off the ship and have to swim right back to it."

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Pirating!, Monday, period 1

Mon, 07 Jun 2021 15:37:24 GMT

Posted by: betterthanaplan

“Sword fights,” Duke said, once the students had gathered. “Totally a classic pirate trope. Especially if you make use of all the fun deck levels.”

"A bit of swashbucklin' never hurt anyone," Edward said merrily. "Well. It's hurt no one worth talking about."

He held out an ornate, curved blade. "Specifically, the cutlass, as it's preferred by my people. Quite a handy thing for a bit of fencing, to the death or otherwise."

“We’ve got some wooden ones for you all to practice with. Ed, you wanna give them some tips?”

"A cutlass ain't no ordinary sword," Edward said, demonstrating a quick cut, a chop, and a parry. "It's lighter and more versatile than your big knightly blades and all that nonsense. Stay on the move when you fight. Move wide, slash quickly, embrace the chaos of it."

Another parrying move.

"Also consider your footwork," he said, as his feet moved nimbly across the room. "As I said, fast an' movin's the word. Practice a bit, then take turns fighting one another. Get a feel for it."

“Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee,” Duke said. “Have fun!”

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Pirating!, Monday

Mon, 31 May 2021 05:00:06 GMT

Posted by: doesnotkneel

"Well, I needn't tell you all that most pirates are not vegetables," Edward spoke dryly, as they met outside the Jackdaw. "And we do tend to do quite a bit more plundering than sitting around in lounge chairs."

"Which is admittedly probably where everything goes wrong," Duke said cheerfully. Giving Edward a shiteating smirk. "But also more fun."

"As you can see, the Jackdaw is still in fine shape, thank you," Edward said, "And my crew have no complaints about the plunder."

He cleared his throat.

"Speaking of which," he called, "Who would like to fire a cannon today?"

". . . Wait, fire it at what?" Duke asked. His boat was the only large, thematic target around here!

Edward clapped his shoulder with a merry hand. "The wide ocean, of course," he said. He turned to the Jackdaw. "OI! YOU LAZY LADS OF LEISURE! GET READY TO RAISE THE SAILS AND CAST OFF!"

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Pirating!, Monday, period 1

Mon, 24 May 2021 14:46:36 GMT

Posted by: betterthanaplan

"So you lot have made a whole lot of terribly wrong films about us," Edward said. He probably didn't need to bellow that much - filling this classroom with noise didn't take much projecting - but it amused him to do so. "Today, you'll watch one of them. Next week, I'll tell you just how awfully wrong they were."

He pointed at Duke. "This modern-day pirate has seen fit to choose a film. Let's see how he fared, shall we?"

“There is no way Edward knows me well enough to trust me with this task,” Duke said, smirking. “There are a lot of really terrible pirate movies, but after . . . about five minutes consulting a Wikipedia list, I present to you: our movie.”

That’s right, Edward. Have fun picking apart the accuracy of singing vegetables.

"Ah, Wikipedia," Edward said, "The finest oracle of the age, and by 'fine', I of course mean: predictably full of bollocks."

He made a dramatic gesture with his arm. "Please, sit and watch this ripe nonsense."

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Pirating!, Monday, period 1

Mon, 17 May 2021 14:34:36 GMT

Posted by: betterthanaplan

A message had gone out ~~handwavily~~ to meet at the port this week. When they got there they’d find their teachers standing in front of an old fashioned tall ship, its sails furled, rigging stretched all the way up the masts.

“Welcome back,” Duke said. “Or just . . . welcome in general.” Since two of their students were out of town last week.

"Welcome to Pirating, lads," said an amused Edward, clearly in his element. "This beauty of a brig's the Jackdaw, my ship, stolen right from amidst a Spanish treasure fleet."

He gave a dramatic wave with his arm.

"She's a nation to the worthy free. And today, you lot get to climb 'round her like fools."

Duke had to bite back the urge to add “allegedly” a Nader his breath at the mention of the ship being stolen.

Well. The statute of limitations should be long over on it, anyway.

“Basically you’re going to do a little obstacle course.” He pointed out the path along the boat. “Up to the forecastle, scale the rigging, swing over to the center mast, grab a flag from the crow’s nest, then head back down to the poop deck any way you want to. First to hand their flag off to one of us wins.” He grinned. “Cheating is encouraged.”

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Pirating! How To Get Stuff And Sail Good Doing It

Mon, 10 May 2021 14:22:09 GMT

Posted by: doesnotkneel

Hello, class! Neither of your teachers had actually applied to teach this class, but Edward, at least, didn't seem particularly fussed about it. Beyond the bit where they were in a classroom, when this class was clearly a better fit for running about outside causing trouble.

"Morning, lads," he called, his voice filling the room. "And welcome to 'Pirating'. Some sad old scholar will likely tell you that that ain't a word. Ignore them. Rule number one of piracy is: we do as we want and become who we like! Regardless of classroom conventions and dictionaries and all that rot!"

He stomped his foot once, smirking, and called, "My name is Edward Kenway, captain of the Jackdaw. Though if you ask the English, I've many a different name, and few of them flattering."

Well. Duke could at least agree with that rule. Though he was a bit distracted side-eying the class roster.

Specifically the two cops on said roster.

“And I’m just Duke,” he said, lifting his hand in a little wave. At least with Edward here he didn’t feel the need to do his own pirate-y accent.

Eh, if the two cops decided to make trouble, Edward would know how to deal with them. (And his accent wasn't piratey, bloody hell. He was Welsh, thank you very much.)

"Myself and my new compatriot here will be teaching you all about the ways of the pirate this semester, as ordained by the school moose," said Edward, all grins. "From climbing the rigging all the way to cuttin' off noses where necessary. Now, I'm afraid I haven't been on this island in some time, and so do not recognize your faces. Would you care for an introduction of your own?"

“That had better be hyperbole.” Duke rubbed the bridge of his nose and wondered what the hell the moose had gotten him into now.

“Introductions,” he agreed. “A first week tradition. Tell us, uh. Your name and what kind of pirate-y thing you want to learn.”

"Pirate-y," Edward concluded, "Is hereby declared a word, as well."

Oh, this would be fun.

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So You Want to Be a Pirate!, Wednesday, period two

Wed, 18 Dec 2019 05:18:34 GMT

Posted by: betterthanaplan

Duke was looking slightly less like a crazy person this week — but since his gremlin bite persona last week hadn't been quite as out of character as he might like to think, it was really only very slightly. He had a pirate hat on, and Polly Lobster (Duke would swear the porg itself had insisted on keeping the name) on his shoulder, and a piratey cutlass at his side.

"Welcome to the last pirate class!" he said, once the students had gathered. "You've all survived! Congratulations! I was thinking we could finish things off with a nice pirate party —"

His hat went flying backwards off his head and stuck onto the mast behind him, a short, rough-hewn arrow piercing right through it.

"— Or maybe we'll get attacked by enemy pirates." Duke turned to look at the enormous, palm-tree laden boats appearing out of the mist off their port bow. "Sure. That works."

A trio of little round creatures loomed at the prow of the enemy boat.

"Please tell me those aren't porg pirates." Duke squinted at them. "Ah. Nope. Coconut pirates. It's all good, Polly." Polly burbled and shifted to try to hide behind his hair as another volley of arrows rent the air.

"Well?" Duke asked his students. "What are you waiting for? Attack!"

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So You Want to Be a Pirate!, Wednesday, period two

Wed, 11 Dec 2019 07:50:52 GMT

Posted by: betterthanaplan

So a funny thing happened on the way to the Danger Shop today. Duke, under the questionable influence of what he'd foolishly thought was just a normal snow shower, had decided that he could heroically rescue the little shivering green thing he saw scuttle into a bush.

Which would be how he ended up in front of his class today, wearing a dish towel tied around his head as a bandana and leaning on a crooked stick as a crutch, which a very confused porg perched on his shoulder.

"Hello, my little cabin boys and girls!" he greeted boisterously, with a much more subtle yet still distinct pirate-y accent. "'Tis I, Long John Silver. I seem to have been summoned here to this fine ship to assist in teaching you all the ways of the sea! In particular. . . ." He dug around in his pockets, then looked at the porg. "Polly?"

The porg spat out a crumbled up piece of note paper.

"Thank you, Polly. You're a delightful lobster." He shook the excess porg spit from the paper and examined it. "Yes, in particular, according to this note, 'sea shanties finally dammit'." He handed the note back to the porg, who promptly ate it again. "Now, I don't know about this 'finally' business, but I do know a good jaunty tune or two. So we'll be singing one of those today. Aren't you all lucky! Let's begin."

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